Muslimah-S
Seek The Almighty
Have a laugh
Husband says; "When I'm gone you'll never find another man like me".
Wife replied; "What makes you think I'd want another man like you!"
When I was young I used to pray for a bike, then I realized that God doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness.
In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbours listen.
Teacher: Work hard to get ahead
Student: I've already got one
Man: I could go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: Yes, but would you stay there?
Man: I offer you myself.
Woman: I am sorry I never accept cheap gifts.
Man: I want to share everything with you.
Woman: Let's start from your bank account.
The Perfect Son.
A: I have the perfect son.
B: Does he smoke?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: Does he drink whiskey?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: Does he ever come home late?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he?
A: He will be six months old next Wednesday.
The doctor to the patient: 'You are very sick'
The patient to the doctor: 'Can I get a second opinion?'
The doctor again: 'Yes, you are very ugly too...'
Patient: Doctor, I have a pain in my eye whenever I drink tea.
Doctor: Take the spoon out of the mug before you drink.
PUPIL: "Would you punish me for something I didn`t do?"
TEACHER:" Of course not."
PUPIL: "Good, because I haven`t done my homework."
Father: What did you do today to help your mother?
Son: I dried the dishes
Daughter: And I helped pick up the pieces.
A man receives a phone call from his doctor.
The doctor says, "I have some good news and some bad news."
The man says, "OK, give me the good news first."
The doctor says, "The good news is, you have 24 hours to live."
The man replies, "Oh no! If that's the good news, then what's the bad news?"
The doctor says, "The bad news is, I forgot to call you yesterday."
Q: Which is faster, heat or cold?
A: Heat, because you can catch a cold.
Husband says; "When I'm gone you'll never find another man like me".
Wife replied; "What makes you think I'd want another man like you!"
When I was young I used to pray for a bike, then I realized that God doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness.
In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbours listen.
Teacher: Work hard to get ahead
Student: I've already got one
Man: I could go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: Yes, but would you stay there?
Man: I offer you myself.
Woman: I am sorry I never accept cheap gifts.
Man: I want to share everything with you.
Woman: Let's start from your bank account.
The Perfect Son.
A: I have the perfect son.
B: Does he smoke?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: Does he drink whiskey?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: Does he ever come home late?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he?
A: He will be six months old next Wednesday.
The doctor to the patient: 'You are very sick'
The patient to the doctor: 'Can I get a second opinion?'
The doctor again: 'Yes, you are very ugly too...'
Patient: Doctor, I have a pain in my eye whenever I drink tea.
Doctor: Take the spoon out of the mug before you drink.
PUPIL: "Would you punish me for something I didn`t do?"
TEACHER:" Of course not."
PUPIL: "Good, because I haven`t done my homework."
Father: What did you do today to help your mother?
Son: I dried the dishes
Daughter: And I helped pick up the pieces.
A man receives a phone call from his doctor.
The doctor says, "I have some good news and some bad news."
The man says, "OK, give me the good news first."
The doctor says, "The good news is, you have 24 hours to live."
The man replies, "Oh no! If that's the good news, then what's the bad news?"
The doctor says, "The bad news is, I forgot to call you yesterday."
Q: Which is faster, heat or cold?
A: Heat, because you can catch a cold.
