Having BF & GF in Islam

[syed_saalim]

What does Islam say about having Boyfriends or Girlfriends?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What does Islam say about having Boyfriends or Girlfriends?



Islam strictly forbids us to have any kind of relationship with a Non-Mehram ( people you can get married to). Whether it’s just a friendship relationship or love relationship or even fianc? relationship.



Before Nikkah, no contacts should be indulged between a man and a woman. Cause; remember when two people are alone (a boy and a girl) the third person there is the Satan (Evil), who always encourages you to commit sins and as a result it leads to Jina/Fornication.



And as Muslims we must be knowing that Fornication or -----ery, (--- outside marriage) is Haram in Islam. It is considered to be one of the major sins.



Dear brothers and sisters in Islam, are we so pious that we can afford to carry these sins with us to the Hereafter? If you ask me, I’ll have to say no, because I know that, the weight of my sins are way heavier then my rewards, so therefore I can’t afford to commit those sins, and I am sure neither can you.



Many of us claim that they are not doing anything wrong, just by talking on the phone or chatting on MSN, writing mail or e-mailing, with their boyfriends or girlfriends. But we have to realize that, it is still wrong to do that, because we are still in contact with a non-mehram, which is again strictly prohibited in Islam.



And some others say that it’s ok if they talk to their fianc?© or future husband/wife, but what is the guarantee that, this person will end up being your life partner? Then why, waste our jewels or modesty, unnecessarily?



Allah Tallah has mentioned it to us that, “the jina of the ear is what you hear, the jina of the tongue is what you say, the jina of the mind is what you think, the jina of the hand is what you touch, and the jina of the eye is what you see”. Is it still not clear enough that by any sorts of contact we are still committing sins?



By saying “I love you” to any boy/girl, we are committing the jina of our tongue, by hearing something like that from someone, we are committing the jina of our ear, and so on.



So therefore, dear brothers and sisters, its time we wake up and open up our hearts and ears and turn back to Allah’s command. We can’t allow the devil to take over us. The person we sacrifices for the sake of Allah, surely Allah will grant them happiness.



This is especially for Women:



Allah Talla has given us (the women) the best jewel we could have, and that gets lost when we expose it in front of other men. The women’s bodies are like the rose petals and if touched or seened to much over and over again, it will loss its lustre. Would any of us keep our diamonds displayed in public? Then, why is it that we are displaying our bodies to others.



We have to remember that, whatever Allah Talla commanded us to do that is what is best for us.



AND LET ME REMIND U AGAIN CLEARLY THAT ……..



1: Kissing, not allowed in Islam



2: Huging, not allowed in Islam



3:Talking on the phone with non-mehram, not allowed in Islam



4: Writing mail,…. still not allowed in Islam





NOW IT SEEMS TO ME THAT THE POINT IS PRETTY CLEAR DON’T U THINK???



And remember to do Istikhara Salah before you decide to marry anyone, cuz Allah is All-Knowing, and He knows what we know not. Like a person by their Iman, not by how they look, or what they have or what they are.



This is a very simple test, you will FOrWaRd this message around, if you are a true believer and if you care for others.



May Allah Talla give us the ability to stay away from these evil acts and bless us with His Mercy and guide us on the right path. Ameen


By: © Syed Saalim

 

[jabba]

:salam2:
It's great that you posted your oppinion on here however, are you a scholar???NO as obvious as it is that having a gf/bf is haram you should give proof from quran and hadiths

 

[muslim forever]

:salam2:
som people need to chillout

 

[muslim forever]

:salam2:
if u dont like wat is being posted dont repli to it

 

[Umm_Ibrahim]

I think everybody knows we can't have bf or gf, we can't touch the opposite sexy before wedding, we can't even show ourselfs for they ! so yes it is obivious

 

[proudmuslimah]

The only thing I want to say in response to this posting is it is very difficult in this day and age to pursue marriage in a halal way. I believe it is very dangerous to marry someone without getting to know them first. Talking on the phone, talking through email, or meeting in a place with a chaperone to me is very important. The last thing I want for my brothers and sisters is to get into a marriage that is abusive or hurtful to them in any way.

It is especially difficult for converts to meet their life partners because they do not necessarily have family and friends to introduce them to the man/woman they will marry.

I support websites like qiran.com that help Muslims find their life partners in a modest way.

 

[junaid hasan]

Once i paste a opinion of a big scholar but there was no hadiths present . so one of my respected sister moderator delete that.

so i dont know how reliable source it is.

 

[jabba]

Once i paste a opinion of a big scholar but there was no hadiths present . so one of my respected sister moderator delete that.

so i dont know how reliable source it is.

well no hadiths and no verses from the Quran tell me anything

 

[jabba]

:salam2:
if u dont like wat is being posted dont repli to it

:astag: I could say the same to you, but I won;t :muslim_child:

 

[muslimah4ever]

Quran...

Surah An-Nisa Ayah 25:

"If any of you cannot afford to marry a free believing woman, let him marry one of his own slave girls who is a believer; Allah knows how good you are in your faith. You all belong to one and the same community so marry them with the permission of their family and give them their dowry so that they may live a decent life in wedlock and not live as prostitutes or look for SECRET ILLICIT RELATIONSHIPS. Then, if after marriage they commit adultry, they shall be given half the punishment prescribed for a free adulteress. The concession of such a marriage is for those of you who fear that they might commit a sin (if they do not get married), but it is better for you to practice self-restraint. Allah is Forgiving, Merciful.

 

[jamafg]

There is the proof you asked for:
Couple agrees to meet in chaperoned, group environment. Umar related that the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, "Not one of you should meet a woman alone unless she is accompanied by a relative (mahram)" (Bukhari/Muslim). The Prophet (peace be upon him) also reportedly said, "Whenever a man is alone with a woman, Satan (Shaytan) is the third among them" (Tirmidhi). When young people are getting to know each other, being alone together is a temptation toward wrongdoing. At all times, Muslims should follow the commands of the Qur'an (24:30-31) to "lower their gaze and guard their modesty...." Islam recognizes that we are human and are given to human weakness, so this rule provides safeguards for our own sake.

*Removed*

:salam2:
It's great that you posted your oppinion on here however, are you a scholar???NO as obvious as it is that having a gf/bf is haram you should give proof from quran and hadiths

 

[jamafg]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PdzH9YrE-y0

The only thing I want to say in response to this posting is it is very difficult in this day and age to pursue marriage in a halal way. I believe it is very dangerous to marry someone without getting to know them first. Talking on the phone, talking through email, or meeting in a place with a chaperone to me is very important. The last thing I want for my brothers and sisters is to get into a marriage that is abusive or hurtful to them in any way.

It is especially difficult for converts to meet their life partners because they do not necessarily have family and friends to introduce them to the man/woman they will marry.

I support websites like qiran.com that help Muslims find their life partners in a modest way.

 

[must91]

please be in the bounds

Yes shaking hands with a non-mahram is like holding fire in your hands. It is certainly not part of the Islamic culture. There is also this hadiths whereby our Nabi Muhammad (SWS) is repored to have said and the best understood meaning of that is when there are two (male & female non maharam) alone, the third one is shaitaan.

However before drawing conclusions one must refrain from opinions that makes Islam look like a society of heartless strangers - certainly without any human feelings.

Islam gives people the right to choose and make decisions for themselves.

I am forgetting whether it was Jabir (ra) or Abdullah bin Jabir (ra) said that there lived a beautiful girl across the road and he used to admire her secretly but when he heard our Nabi Muhammad (SWS) say if you love someone you must let the person know. He therefore went and told the girl of his feelings and it ended up in their nikah.

Once the Nabi of Allah (SWT) Muhammad (SWS) was travelling with his cousin - the son of Hamza (ra) who was quite young compared to the age of the Prophet (SWS). The young sahabi was very handsome and the pair was suddenly passed by a beautiful girl riding on a camel. Soon the Nabi of Allah noticed that he had lost his young cousin. the two young people were engaged in exchanging glances. Imagine with the Prophet (SWS) and yet exchanging glances with a non mahram. so what did the Prophet (SWS) do? a big thundering slap and some cold harsh words, no. The Rahmatullil-alameen (SWS) very lovingly tilted his cousins cheek to the other side making him realize that it was not appropriate.

Islam has given us the right and freedom to evrything but at the same time has set out our limits. It is only when we transgress these limits which are known as hudud -us- shar'ee that makes us sinners and unIslamic.

 

[arabiantxn]

What does Islam say about having Boyfriends or Girlfriends?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What does Islam say about having Boyfriends or Girlfriends?



Islam strictly forbids us to have any kind of relationship with a Non-Mehram ( people you can get married to). Whether it’s just a friendship relationship or love relationship or even fianc? relationship.



Before Nikkah, no contacts should be indulged between a man and a woman. Cause; remember when two people are alone (a boy and a girl) the third person there is the Satan (Evil), who always encourages you to commit sins and as a result it leads to Jina/Fornication.



And as Muslims we must be knowing that Fornication or -----ery, (--- outside marriage) is Haram in Islam. It is considered to be one of the major sins.



Dear brothers and sisters in Islam, are we so pious that we can afford to carry these sins with us to the Hereafter? If you ask me, I’ll have to say no, because I know that, the weight of my sins are way heavier then my rewards, so therefore I can’t afford to commit those sins, and I am sure neither can you.



Many of us claim that they are not doing anything wrong, just by talking on the phone or chatting on MSN, writing mail or e-mailing, with their boyfriends or girlfriends. But we have to realize that, it is still wrong to do that, because we are still in contact with a non-mehram, which is again strictly prohibited in Islam.



And some others say that it’s ok if they talk to their fianc?© or future husband/wife, but what is the guarantee that, this person will end up being your life partner? Then why, waste our jewels or modesty, unnecessarily?



Allah Tallah has mentioned it to us that, “the jina of the ear is what you hear, the jina of the tongue is what you say, the jina of the mind is what you think, the jina of the hand is what you touch, and the jina of the eye is what you see”. Is it still not clear enough that by any sorts of contact we are still committing sins?



By saying “I love you” to any boy/girl, we are committing the jina of our tongue, by hearing something like that from someone, we are committing the jina of our ear, and so on.



So therefore, dear brothers and sisters, its time we wake up and open up our hearts and ears and turn back to Allah’s command. We can’t allow the devil to take over us. The person we sacrifices for the sake of Allah, surely Allah will grant them happiness.



This is especially for Women:



Allah Talla has given us (the women) the best jewel we could have, and that gets lost when we expose it in front of other men. The women’s bodies are like the rose petals and if touched or seened to much over and over again, it will loss its lustre. Would any of us keep our diamonds displayed in public? Then, why is it that we are displaying our bodies to others.



We have to remember that, whatever Allah Talla commanded us to do that is what is best for us.



AND LET ME REMIND U AGAIN CLEARLY THAT ……..



1: Kissing, not allowed in Islam



2: Huging, not allowed in Islam



3:Talking on the phone with non-mehram, not allowed in Islam



4: Writing mail,…. still not allowed in Islam





NOW IT SEEMS TO ME THAT THE POINT IS PRETTY CLEAR DON’T U THINK???



And remember to do Istikhara Salah before you decide to marry anyone, cuz Allah is All-Knowing, and He knows what we know not. Like a person by their Iman, not by how they look, or what they have or what they are.



This is a very simple test, you will FOrWaRd this message around, if you are a true believer and if you care for others.



May Allah Talla give us the ability to stay away from these evil acts and bless us with His Mercy and guide us on the right path. Ameen


By: © Syed Saalim

As ancient traditional and backward this might sound. Its true and there is a reason for it to be said. I pray that allah guides us on the straight path and for those who are soul searching help them with a ritchous spouse. come on ppl stop fighting

 

[dna1987]

Yes shaking hands with a non-mahram is like holding fire in your hands. It is certainly not part of the Islamic culture. There is also this hadiths whereby our Nabi Muhammad (SWS) is repored to have said and the best understood meaning of that is when there are two (male & female non maharam) alone, the third one is shaitaan.

However before drawing conclusions one must refrain from opinions that makes Islam look like a society of heartless strangers - certainly without any human feelings.

Islam gives people the right to choose and make decisions for themselves.

I am forgetting whether it was Jabir (ra) or Abdullah bin Jabir (ra) said that there lived a beautiful girl across the road and he used to admire her secretly but when he heard our Nabi Muhammad (SWS) say if you love someone you must let the person know. He therefore went and told the girl of his feelings and it ended up in their nikah.

Once the Nabi of Allah (SWT) Muhammad (SWS) was travelling with his cousin - the son of Hamza (ra) who was quite young compared to the age of the Prophet (SWS). The young sahabi was very handsome and the pair was suddenly passed by a beautiful girl riding on a camel. Soon the Nabi of Allah noticed that he had lost his young cousin. the two young people were engaged in exchanging glances. Imagine with the Prophet (SWS) and yet exchanging glances with a non mahram. so what did the Prophet (SWS) do? a big thundering slap and some cold harsh words, no. The Rahmatullil-alameen (SWS) very lovingly tilted his cousins cheek to the other side making him realize that it was not appropriate.

Islam has given us the right and freedom to evrything but at the same time has set out our limits. It is only when we transgress these limits which are known as hudud -us- shar'ee that makes us sinners and unIslamic.

I've never read those two hadtihs you just wrote out. Great post; thatnks for writing it Salam alaikum.

 

[amina88]

Thank you for the reminder but what I love about Islam is that it's a religion for all times, not something stuck in the past and only relevant to the ancient people.

 

[aynur7]

if we marry someone who doesn't share the same values with us what we should we do?

 

[jamafg]

if we marry someone who doesn't share the same values with us what we should we do?

Salaam sister,
First of all I wish you all the best and pray that you follow Islam as the teaching of our beloved Prophet PBUH (SUUNAH & QUR'AN), and not as some sectarian branch tell you. I hope you understand what I mean, because I can’t tell you directly.

Now came to your question regarding our partner who doesn't share the same values with us; I would advise if our partner is a Muslim, then we have to remember him the right path of Islam. If after that he still don’t understand or changed, then let him as he like. But only if he does not stopping us from the correct way of practicing your faith. Or if he does not doing haram with us.
But in case if he forces us from practicing Islam as teaching or our Prophet PBUH, then we have to divorce him. Because in the Day of Judgment, everyone will answer just for them self of what we did in our life. So if our partner does something haram, and we follow or stay indifferent, then we will be accountable for. That’s why is best to choose the right person before we marry.
Allah bless all Muslims and put us into the right path. Ameen