how to advice my mother?

[iAmAnonymous]

My mother is a good natured lady but very sentitive.

Due to family and financial problems, she has become irritated. Now she shouts, use bad language, curse.

When I tell her not to use foul words or curse, she think that I am also against her and dont understand her.

When she speaks about her family members bad qualities, I try to avoid as I fear backbiting, but she think that my Islam is moving me away from her.

What should I do?

 

[Nayyararsi]

What do you mean that your islam is taking her away from you.Are you a revert.

 

[wannabe_muttaqi]

Assalamu Alaikum

:salam2: ,
No matter what, you have to be humble with your mother. She might be wrong but you have to be patient and tell her in the best possible manner. you cannot confront her at any time.

 

[stargazer]

Yeah I understand your situation. But you need to clarify, are you a revert. You have the right to disobey only when they command against a commandment of Allah. Allah is the guide. So if you want her to be guided Allah will only guide her. Not you or me. But be kind to her as the Quran mentions, not to say uf to your mother. So if you be kind to her then she will come to see that you are different ever since you start to obey the laws set by Allah.

 

[asmi huma]

salaam alaikum,
i can completely understand ur situation sistr.
i agree with stargazer......
coming to bacbiting stuff u shud be as calm as one can be. 1st listen to calmly n make her understand only wen u think she ll listen to u otherwise ur intension of hellping her will missfire.......the point is that may be ur mothr has gone thru alot jst wait it will pass......

 

[iAmAnonymous]

What do you mean that your islam is taking her away from you.Are you a revert.

I am not a revert but practicing Islam more.

Yeah I understand your situation. But you need to clarify, are you a revert. You have the right to disobey only when they command against a commandment of Allah. Allah is the guide. So if you want her to be guided Allah will only guide her. Not you or me. But be kind to her as the Quran mentions, not to say uf to your mother. So if you be kind to her then she will come to see that you are different ever since you start to obey the laws set by Allah.

I dont argue with her. But when I advice her not to use bad language and dont curse relatives much, she thinks I am siding with her relatives and agree with their wrong attitude towards my mother.

For example she asks me, arent her relatives bad or disgusting people. I keep quite due to Allah's fear regarding backbiting...so she becomes sad and angry with me.

Pls pray for her.

 

[stargazer]

You are in a hard situation. I pray for ur mother. She has some aqeedha problem. You have to find something that will soften her heart and become humble to Allah. It might happen one day god willing when may be she hears a verse from Quran or a preaching from a scholar or may Allah will make it possible through you. So keep trying and be hopeful. Whatever happens comes from Allah and it happens for good. Keep praying

 

[A gift]

there is no(muslim) mother in this world would hate that her son\daughter parctice their deen ISLAM . may be she is angry about something else women feel distracted at some point of their life so you should be there for her and dont show this comppassion towards those who she doesnt like .if your mother doesnty like them you should (must)stay away from them

 

[fada_all]

salam alikom

i totally understand you ukhti , i agree with stargazer n sis gift , yet i advice you dear ukhti to do this thing when you see your mother is very nervous don't talk with her at that time absolutely..just keep silent and never try to advice her when she is in such situation ,no one in her place will accept any interfer from any other, either being sensitive or not ukhti , if you want to talk with your mother talk with her when she is ok happy in a clever way ,bear in mind her sensitivity .for example this is not good for your health ...and things like this ukhti and then when she reacts and answers you tell her politey this is not good according to allah swt and his prophet saaa, if it doesn't work with her ,bring her a lecture and tell her please listen to this it is very good ......and like this ukhti , and whenever you pray ask allah swt to guide her ukhti and the most important thing is TO BE PATIENT ............ukhti im talikng with you because i have faced the same situation wallahi but alhmadolillah i solved it with a great success with allah's help ..but it was not my own mother .... just be patient and clever

may allah guide her and all of us to the right path ameeennnnnnnn