how to avoid hurting attitude ???

[saima abdullah]

Assalam Alaikum


I feel this is very good advice and If you could please forgive me for my ignorance and maybe someone could tell me exactly what zikar of astaghfirullah means and how I could do it??

sooo sweet of you sister
astaghfirullah is word to repent, and it means o Allah forgive me , Prophet S.A.W use to say this more then 70 times a day there are many other duws for repentance
love you for sake of Allah

 

[allah is with me]

well in order to finish anger u gotta take out the fire so thats how i take out mine......u mite use a different remedy but i find this 1 perfect for me cause else i mite end up saying something really bad on my dads face when he insults me infront of other people jz to show off his control over me......

you know what when my dad scolds me..
i go to my room, and shut the door, and i try to sleep....
but i love and miss my dad..

 

[podolski11]

you know what when my dad scolds me..
i go to my room, and shut the door, and i try to sleep....
but i love and miss my dad..

well u can sleep which is really good but i cant due to the fact my body is on fire and i aint joking i can actually feel as if my hands are burning due to my body heat....so well if i could sleep then i would but its jz too hot to take a nap although i do take nap after punching it all out.....it feels as if i jz took the weight of a grizzly bear of my shoulders and i actually feel cold after i do it

 

[allah is with me]

well u can sleep which is really good but i cant due to the fact my body is on fire and i aint joking i can actually feel as if my hands are burning due to my body heat....so well if i could sleep then i would but its jz too hot to take a nap although i do take nap after punching it all out.....it feels as if i jz took the weight of a grizzly bear of my shoulders and i actually feel cold after i do it

ya na!..
even i before would feel the same...
if some one whould hurt me , i would go up, and iwould find some glasses...
i would go there and punch the glasses, and such a bad blood....
my hands would be fractured..
but it hurts only for some days, and then it gets normal..
so i find something else

 

[ahmed_indian]

salam alaykum

what i do is when im angry...i go to my room, lock the door and keep punching the wall till i cool off with another pain which is the pain of blood coming from my knuckles

i'll give u an easy way.. go to the park. hold the tree and shout with full force.
until u get tired and feel anger is gone.

but try prophetic method: seeking refuge in Allah frm shaitan and drink water/make wudu.

 

[podolski11]

i'll give u an easy way.. go to the park. hold the tree and shout with full force.
until u get tired and feel anger is gone.

but try prophetic method: seeking refuge in Allah frm shaitan and drink water/make wudu.

lol...nearby people will think im a suicide bomber or something....hahhhaha

 

[um_mustafa]

well in order to finish anger u gotta take out the fire so thats how i take out mine......u mite use a different remedy but i find this 1 perfect for me cause else i mite end up saying something really bad on my dads face when he insults me infront of other people jz to show off his control over me......

Salams Brother ,
we are advised to sit down if we are angry, if that don't work to lie down , if that doesnt work take wudu, and ask Allah to protect you from the devil,
hope this helps.
w/salams

 

[phy_sabet]

peace upon u all

ALLAH said

وَلا تَسْتَوِي الْحَسَنَةُ وَلا السَّيِّئَةُ ادْفَعْ بِالَّتِي هِيَ أَحْسَنُ فَإِذَا الَّذِي بَيْنَكَ وَبَيْنَهُ عَدَاوَةٌ كَأَنَّهُ وَلِيٌّ حَمِيمٌ

34 Sûrat Fussilat
(They are Explained in detail) XLI


and the translation is"The good deed and the evil deed cannot be equal.

Repel (the evil) with one which is better (i.e. Allah ordered the

faithful believers to be patient at the time of anger, and to excuse those

who treat them badly), then verily! he, between whom and you there was

enmity, (will become) as though he was a close friend. "


Indeed in the Quran stories, there is a lesson for men of understanding

let`s have a tour

let`s start with this hard situation that the prophet Yusuf (Joseph) faced

when he want to restore his beloved brother by playing a trick that

his brother is a thief .. ponder what his brothers said

ALLAH said

قَالُوا إِنْ يَسْرِقْ فَقَدْ سَرَقَ أَخٌ لَهُ مِنْ قَبْلُ فَأَسَرَّهَا يُوسُفُ فِي نَفْسِهِ وَلَمْ يُبْدِهَا لَهُمْ قَالَ أَنْتُمْ شَرٌّ مَكَاناً وَاللَّهُ أَعْلَمُ بِمَا تَصِفُونَ

77 Sûrat Yûsuf
[(Prophet) Joseph) ] XII



and the translation is "They [(Yusuf's (Joseph) brothers] said: "If he steals,

there was a brother of his [Yusuf (Joseph)] who did steal before (him)." But

these things did Yusuf (Joseph) keep in himself, revealing not the secrets to

them. He said (within himself): "You are in worst case, and Allah knows best

the truth of what you assert!"


subhanALLAH

so what ever this person who hurting u are so close even if he is one of ur

family like brother or parents u have to forget and forgive like yusuf (PUH)

ALLAH said

)
قَالَ هَلْ عَلِمْتُمْ مَا فَعَلْتُمْ بِيُوسُفَ وَأَخِيهِ إِذْ أَنْتُمْ جَاهِلُونَ (89) قَالُوا أَئِنَّكَ لأَنْتَ يُوسُفُ قَالَ أَنَا يُوسُفُ وَهذَا أَخِي قَدْ مَنَّ اللَّهُ

عَلَيْنَا إِنَّهُ مَنْ يَتَّقِ وَيَصْبِرْ فَإِنَّ اللَّهَ لا يُضِيعُ أَجْرَ الْمُحْسِنِينَ (90) قَالُوا تَاللَّهِ لَقَدْ آثَرَكَ اللَّهُ عَلَيْنَا وَإِنْ كُنَّا لَخَاطِئِينَ (91)


قَالَ لا تَثْرِيبَ عَلَيْكُمْ الْيَوْمَ يَغْفِرُ اللَّهُ لَكُمْ وَهُوَ أَرْحَمُ الرَّاحِمِينَ

Sûrat Yûsuf
[(Prophet) Joseph) ] XII



and the translation is "

He(joseph) said: "Do you know what you did with Yusuf (Joseph) and his

brother, when you were ignorant?,They said: "Are

you indeed Yusuf (Joseph)?" He said: "I am Yusuf (Joseph), and this is my

brother (Benjamin). Allah has indeed been gracious to us. Verily, he who

fears Allah with obedience to Him (by abstaining from sins and evil deeds,

and by performing righteous good deeds), and is patient, then surely,

Allah makes not the reward of the Muhsinun to be lost,They said: "By Allah!

Indeed Allah has preferred you above us, and we certainly have been


sinners, He said: "No reproach on you this day, may Allah forgive you, and He

is the Most Merciful of those who show mercy! "


so forget the pain that is no thing compared with ur reward (ALLAH willing)

just smile and say gzak ALLAH khiran and trust me u r the winner and

he is the big looser


:salam2:

 

[podolski11]

Salams Brother ,
we are advised to sit down if we are angry, if that don't work to lie down , if that doesnt work take wudu, and ask Allah to protect you from the devil,
hope this helps.
w/salams

walaykum salam.....well every1 is telling me to cool down.....im actually really cooled down infront of people...no shouting, no rudeness etc....i hardly even speak(not post ) unless its important...but then why cant the *other* guy whos making me angry think that 1 day every1 will grow up and i wont b dependent on him and what if i shout at him infront of other people?......people jz dont take tension nowadays they get a little excuse to shout at u and they do it even if it is infront of guests.......i still consider it better to quietly deal with my issues with a wall that cant feel or understand pain

 

[palestine]

Asalamu alaykum - all of you have given such a good advice mashaAllah. but i know that when i get angry, i am unable to remember such steps and advices. and so do many other human beings. i'm not the kind of person that can say "i love you" or "i forgive you" in such situations. i take revenge. lol. i'm just being honest and i bet many other members are like that as well, or i go in my room and cry until i feel better. BUT do not FOLLOW MY SUGGESTION, follow that of the prophet s.a.w " Dont get angry, don't get angry, don't get angry", and remember "the strongest person is not the one who can wrestle, it is the one who can control his anger". the prophet s.a.w said that, and it may not be in exact quote. take care ukhti. maybe even say to the person "I leave you to Allah for what you're doing". maybe this will make them think or show them that they are causing you immense pain. asalamu alaykum.

 

[saima abdullah]

peace upon u all

ALLAH said



34 Sûrat Fussilat
(They are Explained in detail) XLI


and the translation is"The good deed and the evil deed cannot be equal.

Repel (the evil) with one which is better (i.e. Allah ordered the

faithful believers to be patient at the time of anger, and to excuse those

who treat them badly), then verily! he, between whom and you there was

enmity, (will become) as though he was a close friend. "


Indeed in the Quran stories, there is a lesson for men of understanding

let`s have a tour

let`s start with this hard situation that the prophet Yusuf (Joseph) faced

when he want to restore his beloved brother by playing a trick that

his brother is a thief .. ponder what his brothers said

ALLAH said



77 Sûrat Yûsuf
[(Prophet) Joseph) ] XII



and the translation is "They [(Yusuf's (Joseph) brothers] said: "If he steals,

there was a brother of his [Yusuf (Joseph)] who did steal before (him)." But

these things did Yusuf (Joseph) keep in himself, revealing not the secrets to

them. He said (within himself): "You are in worst case, and Allah knows best

the truth of what you assert!"


subhanALLAH

so what ever this person who hurting u are so close even if he is one of ur

family like brother or parents u have to forget and forgive like yusuf (PUH)

ALLAH said



Sûrat Yûsuf
[(Prophet) Joseph) ] XII



and the translation is "

He(joseph) said: "Do you know what you did with Yusuf (Joseph) and his

brother, when you were ignorant?,They said: "Are

you indeed Yusuf (Joseph)?" He said: "I am Yusuf (Joseph), and this is my

brother (Benjamin). Allah has indeed been gracious to us. Verily, he who

fears Allah with obedience to Him (by abstaining from sins and evil deeds,

and by performing righteous good deeds), and is patient, then surely,

Allah makes not the reward of the Muhsinun to be lost,They said: "By Allah!

Indeed Allah has preferred you above us, and we certainly have been


sinners, He said: "No reproach on you this day, may Allah forgive you, and He

is the Most Merciful of those who show mercy! "


so forget the pain that is no thing compared with ur reward (ALLAH willing)

just smile and say gzak ALLAH khiran and trust me u r the winner and

he is the big looser


:salam2:

subhan Allah that's wonderful i read that before but its mircal of Quran that every time it come up with different angle n aspect, i have deep aspiration with surah e yousaf coz i believe it is the best solution to domestic problems but we need reminders
jasak Allah for reminding back :mashallah:
tabvarakAllahu fee alimik wa aamalik

 

[saima abdullah]

Asalamu alaykum - all of you have given such a good advice mashaAllah. but i know that when i get angry, i am unable to remember such steps and advices. and so do many other human beings. i'm not the kind of person that can say "i love you" or "i forgive you" in such situations. i take revenge. lol. i'm just being honest and i bet many other members are like that as well, or i go in my room and cry until i feel better. BUT do not FOLLOW MY SUGGESTION, follow that of the prophet s.a.w " Dont get angry, don't get angry, don't get angry", and remember "the strongest person is not the one who can wrestle, it is the one who can control his anger". the prophet s.a.w said that, and it may not be in exact quote. take care ukhti. maybe even say to the person "I leave you to Allah for what you're doing". maybe this will make them think or show them that they are causing you immense pain. asalamu alaykum.

jasak Allah sister on being honest, m not glorifying myself but i dont have heart that i could leave my loved ones on Allah, coz His revenge is greater then ours, and if my family will get pain i will get it too so May Allah forgive us all

 

[palestine]

jasak Allah sister on being honest, m not glorifying myself but i dont have heart that i could leave my loved ones on Allah, coz His revenge is greater then ours, and if my family will get pain i will get it too so May Allah forgive us all

MashaAllah great to know. take care, asalamu alaykum.

 

[nizar83]

aselemu aleikum, i can only reccommend you 1 thing..try to act exactly the same as the prophet did salalahu wa3alayhi weselem..

try to act and react like the sahaba did...such as aboe bakr siddiq and omar ibn khatab and uthman ibn affaan..radialahu anhum jamee3a

i say this because wolahi nobody has experienced hardness and cruel things like they did

im sure you will find comfort and plenty of calmness and wisdom in their attitudes inshallah

m3a selemma