I need an open ear please hear my Jihad

[duahallah]

i need an open ear. im a 2year revert and still not quite familiar with the quran as i should be. many problems burden me such as my mom dislikes and misunderstands me embracing islam. im trying to begin school with no finances and no job. not to mention a family of slaker who live hand to mouth and are ready to degrade you and beg for your last. my friends dont understand my plight. and to top it off a palistinian has fallen in love with me.:shymuslima1:

his name is ammar and he is 22. he saw me at my uncle abuallis house and for six months tried to find out who i was in secret fearing that abualli would be furious of his intrest in me.:arabi1:

i had never dated out of my country or race not that i had a problem, but the combonation was overwhelming. i gave it a shot and now he wants to get married. it's only been two months and i fear its way to early. so i say wait and he says now.:fighta:

his dad wants him to marry soon so he can die knowing he is in good hands. so before i could speak ammar begins making plans and told his entire family of me. his mom is expecting a wedding but he has no consent from either of my parents. my bag of burdens is full enough. my mom would have a fit if she even knew i was dating him let alone speaking of marriage. my dad is fine with it and has given him the green light solong as i can finish college and marry afterwards.

i maid a mistake and said inshaallah that we could marry a month from now if all is well.
im 18 and my life is yet to begin. he promises that i am free to hang with my friends and live on campus solong as i devote myself to him only. my restriction are not many which make me want to marry but still i have fear that i might not be right for him considering our differences. but he does not care.

he is financialy stable and has good intent behind his every move, but i am just finding my self and i need time to feel the world on my own and gain worth for my self. i must learn to love myself before i can love anyone else but maybe this is allahs way of helping me by sending a person who can show me and guide me.

i need to seriously look in my self and find the answer by listening to wat allah is telling me. but my mind and heart our in two different places and i cant bring them together. :shake:
somone please give your opinion it would be greatly appreciated!!!:tti_sister:

 

[BintMuhammad]

Assalamu alaikum,

Insha Allaah you are in the best of health and eeman.

We all know that when a woman marries, she has just saved herself from the fitna of this dunya. That is ofcourse if you marry someone who has the DEEN. So before anything else, you have to make sure that this person has religious commitments. See Attributes of the ideal Muslim husband

If he atleast have the religious commitment and the manners then Insha Allaah go for it. Ofcourse, do not forget to ask Allaah swt for guidance.

May Allaah swt give us the best of everything in this world and in the hereafter AMEEN.

 

[Karima]

Asalamualikum,

Follow your instincts. Your gut feeling. Your heart.

Sallam

 

[TheHumbleWun]

Asalaamalikum sister,

Try reciting Salat-I-Istikhara. It' usually good to say when you have a decision to make and you don't know what to do or which to pick. It's like a divine GPS system, whenever you get lost or don't know which route to take Allah swt will help you choose the right direction for you.

http://islam.about.com/blistikhara.htm

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rj6FkONLyL8&mode=related&search=

 

[Basicofislam]

:salam2: Personally i would say one should wait to get married. 18 is too young for our times. 20-21 i would say go ahead. Has he finished his education??? If not please tell him to finish it before talking about marriage

 

[Southrn_Muslimah]

:salam2:

Have you asked your prospective husband a good set of questions with certain situations? I would not marry blindly without thoroughly getting to know the person. It may take a year or two to truly know someone. There are those cases though where people marry young and survive Only Allah (swt) can help you out here though. Just do that prayer that Brother TheHumbleWun gave you information about.