i need some advice please??

[safaa27]

Assalam Alikum,

My name is Dominique also know as Safaa. I am a 21 year old independet person living in Jersey City, NJ USA. I grew up in a Catholic family, I wasn't as so religious because I did not know anything about being Catholic. We go to church every sunday and eat lunch after and that was all. As i moved here to the US it was just me, so I went through alot from moving to California to New Jersey was a big step then I had encounter more issues in my life that I couldn't handle. My life was going down the drain at that point until I met Ahmed, he is now my fiance inshaalllah my soon to be husbund. He talked about Islam alot and me being a open and great listener it brought me closer. He had friends that were muslim and would help me out with my question, I wanted to convert with out Ahmed knowing because I wanted everyone to know that I converted for me and Allah, no one else. Once he had found out he wanted to take me to the mosque and take my shahada. It was a wonderful feeling after my shahada especially all the sister congratulating you. I love being muslim.

I grew up just having my mom around and haing step dad and half sisters and so on. I had recently tried to look for my father that I only have met once in my whole life. He was a major drug dealer and was so into the game he was murderd. It is such a sad story that I waited this long to look for him, he had passed april 24th 2004 I wated for 5 years till I did this and I am really sadden about it. To make things really confusing and sad; my dad was killed by a muslim. When I finally got to talk to my uncle (my dads brother) he said these words that I can never forget "your people killed your father" what can I say to that? My whole dads side despites muslim people because of what happend. I really dont know how to feel about this situation please help me understand more? Thank you for reading this long entry.

Alikum Salaam
-Safaa
:tti_sister:

 

[DataZak]

Your uncle was just angry. So angry that he seemed to forget that your late father dealt in a haram substance.

Stay close with your mother and stepfather and stepsisters. Also look to your Muslim husband for support (erm, are you two married yet?). Leave your father's side of the family for now. They are so angry they will not listen to your no matter what you say.

 

[safaa27]

But it hurts me so much especially i just converted, it crushed my heart.

im getting married soon insha allah.

 

[shichemlydia]

salam sister

salam alikoum sister,
hope you are doing well,
in fact islam is not about titles, this man who killed yor father is called a muslim perhaps because he is from an arabic speaking country that is all. i am sure if he was a real muslim, he would not do that except by mistake....because a real muslim knows very well how big is the killing of human beings. look for the islamic rulling on killing the people (regardless of their religion)
usually drug dealers are killed by their friends (other drug dealers)
we in muslim countries see this happen from time to time and those who are either killing or being killed have nothing to do with islam, they do not pray, they drink wine, they do not fast...
try to show your uncles the rulling on killing innocent humanbeings...and hopefully they will understand.
may allah make your marriage succeful and a big step towards a happy life full of love and joy, and hope that your husband will give you a brighter picture about muslims ...ameen

 

[ahmed_indian]

,

may Allah make ur path towards His pleasure and paradise easy. Ameen.

dont worry too much sister, almost every convert have to go thru these tough times. be polite, alert and keep ur trust in Allah.

maybe ur uncle is just using an excuse to hate muslims. others use excuses like, 'muslims are terrorists', 'muslims are backward', etc.

ask ur uncle that as ur dad was a drug dealer, dont he think that many lives might have destroyed because of him? and had police killed ur father, will ur uncle hate the christians as well?

Allah says in chapter 29 of Quran:

(Do people think that they will be left alone because they say: "We believe," and will not be tested.

And We indeed tested those who were before them. And Allâh will certainly make (it) known (the truth of) those who are true, and will certainly make (it) known (the falsehood of) those who are liars, (although Allâh knows all that before putting them to test).

 

[stargazer]

salam sister

I appreciate for your endurance to remain on the true path.

Long time ago I realized one important thing. When you are misrepresented or falsely accused and you try everything you can to convince the others that you are innocent and the people seem not to beleive it how does it feel? terrible off course. you are grieved in your spirit. but know this sister no matter what, if Allah the almighty god knows that you are innocent you do not have to convince to anybody after you have tried enouth. Because Allah is bigger and should be more important to all of us.

As for a muslim killing your father, we should judge islam by the quran. and the quran says that if someone kills an innocent human being unless it be for murder or for creating corruption in the land, it is as though he has killed the whole humanity. And if someone save a life, it is as though he has saved the whole humankind. s
What you need right now is endurance and wait for Allah's help and soo it would come.
Allah say:
When My servants ask thee concerning Me, I am indeed close (to them), I respond to the prayer of every supplicant when he calleth on Me

wassalam.

 

[hayat84]

Salam ukhty,it's a sad story.THe first problem of non- muslims is that they believe to be perfect and superior.They don't reflect that all the Human Beings are involved in this terrestial and sometimes problematic life.The murderer is not a muslim,even if he says to belong to Islam,it's a "kafar-billah" everyone who reject his islamic rules for vices and ignorance,so that everyone who claims to be a muslim,but he's "kidnapped"from something "haram"for him,it authomatically far him from the Way to Allah(SHT).I know a man who often prays his salat,but he also often drinks wine:<is he a muslim?Not at all>But as Allah says:Verily allah Is Who forgives.It could be a catholic man,that who killed your father,and so what could they tell you?Maybe there is no perfect muslim in this World,otherswise,why should we live here and suffer for the others' mistakes?Don't worry sister,the Justice belongs to Allah and only to Him.The murderer will face to Allah at the Day of Judgement and he will explain the reason of his behaviour.Don't pay attention to them who accuse you to be a muslim women,because Allah knows the human's heart as good as He knows all the rest of Universe,because He's Allah the Great,the King,the Wise...He's everything you may think.Pain,as love,are two opposed feelings that Allah SHT posed into Human heart to test our patient and mercy,but remember that one day everything will finish and neither the family nor the money will do nothing in front of the strenght of Allah:it will remain us only our actions.

 

[True_Sultan]

salam alikoum sister,
hope you are doing well,
in fact islam is not about titles, this man who killed yor father is called a muslim perhaps because he is from an arabic speaking country that is all. i am sure if he was a real muslim, he would not do that except by mistake....because a real muslim knows very well how big is the killing of human beings. look for the islamic rulling on killing the people (regardless of their religion)
usually drug dealers are killed by their friends (other drug dealers)
we in muslim countries see this happen from time to time and those who are either killing or being killed have nothing to do with islam, they do not pray, they drink wine, they do not fast...
try to show your uncles the rulling on killing innocent humanbeings...and hopefully they will understand.
may allah make your marriage succeful and a big step towards a happy life full of love and joy, and hope that your husband will give you a brighter picture about muslims ...ameen

I agree, wait tilll there anger cools down and then explain to them the meaning, and ask your uncle, how sure is he that the so-called killer is Muslim? Even if he was a muslim he isnt now (notice the word "was" as it is against the value of islam to murder, unless certain curcumstances presume it to be the only option, just like the whole thing about eating pork only when thats the only food source)

Stay Strong my true beautiful sister, Allah will help you

 

[safaa27]

Asalaam Maalikum.

Thank you very much to all borthers and sisters who replied it made me cry because you guys made me understand more about whats going on. STARGAZER I have heard that Surah before in a Islamic class thank you for reminding me it really means alot. To everyone else thank you.