:salam2:
After reading a variety of opinions, I couldnt help but post a reply. Please pardon my long answer but couldn’t find a way to make it any briefer without loosing the clarity.
Alhamdulillah that He has guided us to the religion of Islam. A religion that brings peace and tranquility by submission to Allah.
Alhamdulillah, Allah has made it a religion of ease..... ease for those who submit their hearts to it and hardship for those whose hearts are not settled on it yet. The evidence is oft repeated theme in the Quran such as about salah: Wa innaha la kabiratun illa 3all khashieen... (Verily it, i.e the prayer, is burdening except those who fear Allah) While I sort of understood this concept for a long time, specially when it is time to wakeup for early fajar. So I knew that I have a weakness that needs to be corrected. And same applies to other aspect of Islam.
Allah made rules marriage, divorce, dowry. inheritance and all the other rules as a mercy and ease for us, as a means of regulating islamic communities, to bring peace and tranquility - When we submit to it with a full submission. And when we have reservations the same solutions become a hardship and a curse on us. Just look around in our muslim world, in every country from Africa to Indonesia, where these very solutions have become like insurmountable burdens on us. It is because our selective acceptance of the rules of islam and practice whatever our nafs feels we should submit. It is clearly reflected in the general meaning of the ayah "will you believe in a part of the book and reject a part of the book? What is the recompense of those who do so except humiliation in this world and in the hereafter they will be put to the most severe torment" (TMQ: Almaidah)
Does this mean that every sister has to agree that she be “happy” if her husband wants to have a second wife – no. Every person has his/her own preferences in what Allah has made halal. As an individual you may take whatever from the permissible that is more applealing to you leave aside what is not. It is not necessary that you rush into everything Allah has made halal. It is evidenced by the fact that Ralsulullah
did not prefer to eat desert-lizard meat, which is permissible. But by the same token if something is halal, but you prefer not to do it - do not say I will never-ever do it. Because saying it is like making a halal thing as haram over yourself. Evidence: When the Prophet said that he will never eat honey again – Allah said to him “Why are you making some thing haram that Allah has made it halal for you” (TMQ Attahreem). Also the most difficult issue of disliking or not accepting any part of what has been revealed and legislated in Islam. Evidence: Allah describes the hypocrites/disbelievers by expression like “this is because they dislike some of what Allah has revealed”. Same goes for putting additional restriction be our own perceptions, such as saying about a halal thing that it is acceptable only under such and such a situation. For example multiple marriages are acceptable only when there are more women than men, or only when the first wife consents and so on. This comes under the oft repeated theme in the quran ma laka bihi min sultan “no authority have you in it”
Again, Islam is total submission and whole hearted submission – it is a source of mercy and tranquility for those who submit and source for unease for those who don’t. Those who submit – Allah makes the path of islam easy on them (We will make easy for them the path of ease (i.e islam) TMQ AlLayl 7) and those who don’t Allah makes the crooked path seem very difficult on them (We will make easy for them the path of difficulty (i.e evil) 7 TMQ AlLayl 10 ). So each one of us look at our ownselves and decide where we stand?
And Allah knows best