Letting go
- Thread starter Aapa
- Start date
Ershad
Junior Member
Assalamu Alaikkum wa rahamatullahi wa barakatuhu,
Some precious advice from Ibn al-Qayyim al-Jawziyyah
Reactions to Undesirable Destiny
If the servant experiences something that he hates, he should adopt six views:
One: to acknowledge monotheism. The Will of Allah should be done, and whatever He does not wish should never be done.
Two: to believe in the justice of Allah, and that the judgement of Allah is to be done and His judgement is just.
Three: to believe in mercy: that His mercy concerning this destiny will prevail more than His anger and vengeance.
Four: to believe in wisdom and that all destiny is according to His wisdom. He did not predestine anything without reason.
Five: to praise Allah. Indeed, to Allah all perfect praise is due.
Six: to be servants of Allah. The person is a mere servant of Allah. The orders and judgements of His Lord are to be done to him as he is His servant. He is under the authority and judgements of Allah as well as His religious judgements.
Some precious advice from Ibn al-Qayyim al-Jawziyyah
Reactions to Undesirable Destiny
If the servant experiences something that he hates, he should adopt six views:
One: to acknowledge monotheism. The Will of Allah should be done, and whatever He does not wish should never be done.
Two: to believe in the justice of Allah, and that the judgement of Allah is to be done and His judgement is just.
Three: to believe in mercy: that His mercy concerning this destiny will prevail more than His anger and vengeance.
Four: to believe in wisdom and that all destiny is according to His wisdom. He did not predestine anything without reason.
Five: to praise Allah. Indeed, to Allah all perfect praise is due.
Six: to be servants of Allah. The person is a mere servant of Allah. The orders and judgements of His Lord are to be done to him as he is His servant. He is under the authority and judgements of Allah as well as His religious judgements.
Hajjerr
He is Dhul-Jalali Wal-Ikram
salam aleikum wa rahmatulahy wa barakatuh.
I wanted to add..if these advices work for me, inchallah will help other brothers and sister also:
Happiness is the only goal on earth that all people without exception are seeking to attain. Believers and unbelievers alike seek to be happy, but each party is using different methods.
However, only believers can achieve genuine happiness. All forms of happiness attained without a firm belief in God, the Almighty, are mere illusions.
The following are tips for the attainment of happiness:
1. Know that if you do not live within the scope of today, your thoughts will be scattered, your affairs will become confused, and your anxiety will increase. These realities are explained in the following hadith:
“When you are in the evening, do not expect to see themorning, and when you are in the morning, do not expect to see the evening.” (Saheeh Al-Bukhari)
2. Forget the past and all that it contained, focus on the present.
3. Do not completely preoccupy yourself with the future and then discard the present. Be balanced in life, prepare yourself adequately for all situations.
4. Do not be shaken by criticism; instead, be firm. Be sure that in proportion to your worth, the level of people's criticism rises. Also, make good use of criticism in discovering your shortcomings and faults, and let it drive you toward self-improvement.
5. Have complete faith in God and perform good deeds; these are the ingredients that makeup a good and happy life.
6. If you desire peace, tranquility, and comfort, you can find it all in the remembrance of God.
7. You should know with certainty that everything that happens, occurs in accordance with the divine decree.
8. Do not expect gratitude from anyone.
9. Train yourself to be prepared for the worst possibility.
10. Perhaps what has happened is in your best interest, even though you may not comprehend how that can be so.
11. Everything that is decreed for the believer is the best for him.
12. Enumerate the blessings of God and be thankful for them.
13. Remember that you are better off than many others.
14. Relief comes from one hour to the next. Indeed, with each difficulty there is relief.
15. In both times of hardship and ease, one should turn to supplication and prayer, either patiently contented or thankful.
16. Calamities should strengthen your heart and reshape your outlook in a positive way.
17. Do not let trivialities be the cause of your destruction.
18. Always remember that your God is Oft-Forgiving.
19. Assume an easy-going attitude and avoid anger.
20. Life is bread, water, and shade; so do not be perturbed by a lack of any other material thing.
“And in the heaven is your providence and that which you are promised.” (Quran 51:22)
21. A daunting evil that seemingly will happen usually never occurs.
22. Look at those who have more afflictions and be grateful that you have less.
23. Bear in mind the fact that God loves those who endure trials with steadfastness, so seek to be one of them.
24. Constantly repeat those supplications that the Prophet, may the mercy and blessings of God be upon him, taught us to say during times of hardship.
25. Work hard at something that is productive, and cast off idleness.
26. Do not spread rumors and do not listen to them. If you hear a rumor inadvertently, do not believe it.
27. Know that your malice and your striving to seek revenge are much more harmful to your health than they are to your antagonist.
28. The hardships that befall you atone for your sins, if you endure with patience.
:tti_sister:
http://www.islamreligion.com/articles/2407/
:salam2:
I wanted to add..if these advices work for me, inchallah will help other brothers and sister also:
Happiness is the only goal on earth that all people without exception are seeking to attain. Believers and unbelievers alike seek to be happy, but each party is using different methods.
However, only believers can achieve genuine happiness. All forms of happiness attained without a firm belief in God, the Almighty, are mere illusions.
The following are tips for the attainment of happiness:
1. Know that if you do not live within the scope of today, your thoughts will be scattered, your affairs will become confused, and your anxiety will increase. These realities are explained in the following hadith:
“When you are in the evening, do not expect to see themorning, and when you are in the morning, do not expect to see the evening.” (Saheeh Al-Bukhari)
2. Forget the past and all that it contained, focus on the present.
3. Do not completely preoccupy yourself with the future and then discard the present. Be balanced in life, prepare yourself adequately for all situations.
4. Do not be shaken by criticism; instead, be firm. Be sure that in proportion to your worth, the level of people's criticism rises. Also, make good use of criticism in discovering your shortcomings and faults, and let it drive you toward self-improvement.
5. Have complete faith in God and perform good deeds; these are the ingredients that makeup a good and happy life.
6. If you desire peace, tranquility, and comfort, you can find it all in the remembrance of God.
7. You should know with certainty that everything that happens, occurs in accordance with the divine decree.
8. Do not expect gratitude from anyone.
9. Train yourself to be prepared for the worst possibility.
10. Perhaps what has happened is in your best interest, even though you may not comprehend how that can be so.
11. Everything that is decreed for the believer is the best for him.
12. Enumerate the blessings of God and be thankful for them.
13. Remember that you are better off than many others.
14. Relief comes from one hour to the next. Indeed, with each difficulty there is relief.
15. In both times of hardship and ease, one should turn to supplication and prayer, either patiently contented or thankful.
16. Calamities should strengthen your heart and reshape your outlook in a positive way.
17. Do not let trivialities be the cause of your destruction.
18. Always remember that your God is Oft-Forgiving.
19. Assume an easy-going attitude and avoid anger.
20. Life is bread, water, and shade; so do not be perturbed by a lack of any other material thing.
“And in the heaven is your providence and that which you are promised.” (Quran 51:22)
21. A daunting evil that seemingly will happen usually never occurs.
22. Look at those who have more afflictions and be grateful that you have less.
23. Bear in mind the fact that God loves those who endure trials with steadfastness, so seek to be one of them.
24. Constantly repeat those supplications that the Prophet, may the mercy and blessings of God be upon him, taught us to say during times of hardship.
25. Work hard at something that is productive, and cast off idleness.
26. Do not spread rumors and do not listen to them. If you hear a rumor inadvertently, do not believe it.
27. Know that your malice and your striving to seek revenge are much more harmful to your health than they are to your antagonist.
28. The hardships that befall you atone for your sins, if you endure with patience.
:tti_sister:
http://www.islamreligion.com/articles/2407/
:salam2:
finding light
Ya Rab! Forgive me..
Thank you Sister Hajjerr for the above. Very useful tips....
a_stranger
Junior Member
:salam2:
Thank you sister hajjer
Do not expect gratitude from anyone
This is a most useful advice, for us muslems : we should seek Allah's pleasure and Janna that is why we should not bother if somebody didn't thank our efforts ..........let us remember:
لِيُوَفِّيَهُمْ أُجُورَهُمْ وَيَزِيدَهُم مِّن فَضْلِهِ إِنَّهُ غَفُورٌ شَكُورٌ 35:30
35:30 For He will pay them their meed, nay, He will give them (even) more out of His Bounty: for He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Ready to appreciate (service).
Translation of the meanings of Quran.
Thank you sister hajjer
Do not expect gratitude from anyone
This is a most useful advice, for us muslems : we should seek Allah's pleasure and Janna that is why we should not bother if somebody didn't thank our efforts ..........let us remember:
لِيُوَفِّيَهُمْ أُجُورَهُمْ وَيَزِيدَهُم مِّن فَضْلِهِ إِنَّهُ غَفُورٌ شَكُورٌ 35:30
35:30 For He will pay them their meed, nay, He will give them (even) more out of His Bounty: for He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Ready to appreciate (service).
Translation of the meanings of Quran.
Tomtom
Banned
ADVICE FOR DR. Aapa
For crying out loud stop moping around and go and find a decent guy and get married. Your sons are grown up and soon they will start a family of their own and you will need somebody in your old age. Human beings are made male and female, one completes the other, we are all meant to have relationships no matter how hard we try to deny it. Loneliness is a curse from shaytaan, one is able to praise and worship Allah Subhana Wa Ta'ala with a satisfied and happy heart. Love is a blessing and the people who have it are really blessed indeed.
For crying out loud stop moping around and go and find a decent guy and get married. Your sons are grown up and soon they will start a family of their own and you will need somebody in your old age. Human beings are made male and female, one completes the other, we are all meant to have relationships no matter how hard we try to deny it. Loneliness is a curse from shaytaan, one is able to praise and worship Allah Subhana Wa Ta'ala with a satisfied and happy heart. Love is a blessing and the people who have it are really blessed indeed.
strive-may-i
Junior Member
Cats eyes, death, otherness of lover, death...
I recollect something I read elsewhere. And the poet speaks about why owning cat is good.
What this person has to say about cat, and better still death and that strange phrase "Otherness of lover, otherness is not neglect..." Anynbody who says something agreeable about death and hereafter, i realize more now, is worth reflecting...
I recollect something I read elsewhere. And the poet speaks about why owning cat is good.
Disclaimer: I dont see it as an advice to women. count me on that!
What this person has to say about cat, and better still death and that strange phrase "Otherness of lover, otherness is not neglect..." Anynbody who says something agreeable about death and hereafter, i realize more now, is worth reflecting...
Assalaam walaikum,
I do not have the blues..I am very selective right now. I know what I want. It makes the pool a tad bit smaller.
One of the issues is the independence factor. I am extremely independent. There are a few things I want to do in life that call for more independence. And I have responsibilities besides my sons, my mother.
So, although marriage is on my mind..it is on the back burner...
cats..had a kitten who could not stop having litters...
ended up with dogs, cats, everyone elses kids, fish, stray human beings
for a while I thought I was running a halfway home.
Thanks for the sweet thoughts.
InshaAllah, the time will come...for some unknown reason I want to visit the South Pole and see pink dolphins on the way there.
I do not have the blues..I am very selective right now. I know what I want. It makes the pool a tad bit smaller.
One of the issues is the independence factor. I am extremely independent. There are a few things I want to do in life that call for more independence. And I have responsibilities besides my sons, my mother.
So, although marriage is on my mind..it is on the back burner...
cats..had a kitten who could not stop having litters...
ended up with dogs, cats, everyone elses kids, fish, stray human beings
for a while I thought I was running a halfway home.
Thanks for the sweet thoughts.
InshaAllah, the time will come...for some unknown reason I want to visit the South Pole and see pink dolphins on the way there.
finding light
Ya Rab! Forgive me..
I recollect something I read elsewhere. And the poet speaks about why owning cat is good.
QUOTE]
:salam2:
I have a cat, he is very comforting. I got him in order to fill my loneliness hole and he definitely has. He is so arrogant, does what he wants but the best thing is his silence! And he loves me
And Sabah Al Khair to all. I wish you all a blessed day. Keep me in your duas today.
Living one hour at a time - good advice. Sieze the day!
Aisya al-Humaira
الحمدلله على كل حال
Assalamu'alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh,
This is such a powerful statement, Mashaa Allaah. Thought I'd share it here.
Yup, you know the source.
This is such a powerful statement, Mashaa Allaah. Thought I'd share it here.
Yup, you know the source.
strive-may-i
Junior Member
:salam2:
'Yasmin Mogahed' is quite a good thing for the netizens (...read English crowd). She covers aspects beyond theory. Presents in a manner that's more effective in reaching to people. May her writing be from her Imaan. Because if its her Imaan, then, there is good news for us all, she will get better, and make us better in our Imaan too....
May Allah Guide her even more, and let not whisper of Shaytaan, influence her, may she remain among the righteous ... Ameen!
'Yasmin Mogahed' is quite a good thing for the netizens (...read English crowd). She covers aspects beyond theory. Presents in a manner that's more effective in reaching to people. May her writing be from her Imaan. Because if its her Imaan, then, there is good news for us all, she will get better, and make us better in our Imaan too....
May Allah Guide her even more, and let not whisper of Shaytaan, influence her, may she remain among the righteous ... Ameen!
Aisya al-Humaira
الحمدلله على كل حال
In response to Brother Strive:
It is one thing to have the ability having insights on every single matter that happened which will give rise to the wisdom. Being able to reflect through every creations of God that will then lead back to God Himself.
And it is another thing to have the eloquence of conveying that insights to others that will definitely touch their hearts. It is always that when words that come from the heart; a clean and humble heart will, inshaa Allaah, touches the heart of the recipients.
Combined the two, that are what make the words so powerful and make one to sit back; thinking about it again and again!
May Allaah gives all Believers such skills, Ameen!
It is one thing to have the ability having insights on every single matter that happened which will give rise to the wisdom. Being able to reflect through every creations of God that will then lead back to God Himself.
And it is another thing to have the eloquence of conveying that insights to others that will definitely touch their hearts. It is always that when words that come from the heart; a clean and humble heart will, inshaa Allaah, touches the heart of the recipients.
Combined the two, that are what make the words so powerful and make one to sit back; thinking about it again and again!
May Allaah gives all Believers such skills, Ameen!
Zaii
LifeIsAStruggle____
Asalaamu alaikum, its been such a lonh time since ive been on this thread. I am so glad I came across this thread,this is what I have been looking for. Its Allah's Will I read this. I thank sister aapa nd all those who replied.
To love is to give and to give is to love.
May Allah give us the strength to love Him only and to love everything for his sake Aameen.
Once again,jazakhAllah khair for this post sis aapa and to everyone who replied.
Love you all for the sake.of Allah
Salam alaikum
To love is to give and to give is to love.
May Allah give us the strength to love Him only and to love everything for his sake Aameen.
Once again,jazakhAllah khair for this post sis aapa and to everyone who replied.
Love you all for the sake.of Allah
Salam alaikum
finding light
Ya Rab! Forgive me..
Everything that is being written on this thread is really great advice and it is something that we can take with us and use IN OUR FUTURE. We have loved and lost. Now it is time to learn. So we do. Now we know what to do differently in our future.
BUT! How do you get over the loss... As Aapa has written here... When you have done nothing wrong. When we feel victimised... What brings peace? And more importantly how long does it take! (personal experience needed to answer this question)