1. Abu Sarah
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    Abu Sarah Allahu Akbar Staff Member

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    Love

    Praise be to Allaah.

    Islam came to close the doors that lead to evil and sin, and is keen to block all the means that may lead to corruption of hearts and minds. Love and infatuation between the sexes are among the worst of problems.

    Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in Majmoo’ al-Fataawa (10/129):

    Love is a psychological sickness, and if it grows strong it affects the body, and becomes a physical sickness, either as diseases of the brain, which are said to be diseases caused by waswaas, or diseases of the body such as weakness, emaciation and so on. End quote.

    And he (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in Majmoo’ al-Fataawa (10/132):

    Loving a non-mahram woman leads to many negative consequences, the full extent of which is known only to the Lord of people. It is a sickness that affects the religious commitment of the sufferer, then it may also affect his mind and body. End quote.

    It is sufficient to note that one of the effects of love of a member of the opposite sex is enslavement of the heart which is held captive to the loved one. So love is a door that leads to humiliation and servility. That is sufficient to put one off this sickness.

    Ibn Taymiyah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in Majmoo’ al-Fataawa (10/185):

    If a man is in love with a woman, even if she is permissible for him, his heart remains enslaved to her, and she can control him as she wishes, even though outwardly he appears to be her master, because he is her husband; but in fact he is her prisoner and slave, especially if she is aware of his need and love for her. In that case, she will control him like a harsh and oppressive master controls his abject slave who cannot free himself from him. Rather he is worse off than that, because enslavement of the heart is worse than enslavement of the body. End quote.

    Attachment to the opposite sex will not happen to a heart that is filled with love of Allaah; it only affects a heart that is empty and weak, so it is able to gain control of it, then when it becomes strong and powerful it is able to defeat the love of Allaah and lead the person into shirk. Hence it is said: Love is the action of an empty heart.

    If the heart is devoid of the love and remembrance of the Most Merciful, and is a stranger to speaking to Him, it will be filled with love of women, images and listening to music.

    Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in Majmoo’ al-Fataawa (10/135):

    If the heart loves Allaah alone and is sincerely devoted to Him, it will not even think of loving anyone else in the first place, let alone falling in love. When a heart falls in love, that is due to the lack of love for Allaah alone. Hence because Yoosuf loved Allaah and was sincerely devoted to Him, he did not fall into the trap of love, rather Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

    “Thus it was, that We might turn away from him evil and illegal sexual intercourse. Surely, he was one of Our chosen, (guided) slaves”

    [Yoosuf 12:24]

    As for the wife of al-‘Azeez, she was a mushrik as were her people, hence she fell into this trap. End quote.

    The Muslim must save himself from this fate and not fall short in guarding against it and ridding himself of it. If he falls short in that regard and follows the path of love, by continuing to steal haraam glances or listening to haraam things, and being careless in the way he speaks to the opposite sex, etc, then he is affected by love as a result, then he is sinning and will be subject to punishment for his actions.

    How many people have been careless at the beginning of this problem, and thought that they were able to rid themselves of it whenever they wanted, or that they could stop at a certain limit and not go any further, until the sickness took a strong hold and no doctor or remedy could help?

    Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in Rawdat al-Muhibbeen (147):

    If the cause happens by his choice, he has no excuse for the consequences that are beyond his control, but if the reason is haraam, the drunkard had no excuse. Undoubtedly following one glance with another and allowing oneself to keep thinking about the person is like drinking intoxicants: he is to be blamed for the cause. End quote.

    If a person strives to keep away from the things that lead to this serious sickness, by lowering his gaze and not looking at haraam things, not listening to haraam things, and averting the passing thoughts that the shaytaan casts into his mind, then after that something of the evils of this sickness befalls him because of a passing glance or a transaction that is basically permissible, and his heart becomes attached to a woman, there is no sin on him for that in sha Allaah, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

    “Allaah burdens not a person beyond his scope”

    [al-Baqarah 2:286]

    Ibn Taymiyah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in Majmoo’ al-Fataawa (11/10):

    If that does not result from carelessness or transgression on his part, then there is no sin on him for what befalls him. End quote.

    Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in Rawdat al-Muhibbeen (147):

    If love occurs for a reason that is not haraam, the person is not to be blamed, such as one who loved his wife or slave woman, then he separated from her but the love remained and did not leave him. He is not to be blamed for that. Similarly if there was a sudden glance then he averted his gaze, but love took hold of his heart without him meaning it to, he must, however, ward it off and resist it. End quote.

    But he must treat his heart by putting a stop to the effects of this love, and by filling his heart with love of Allaah and seeking His help in that. He should not feel too shy to consult intelligent and trustworthy people for advice or consult some doctors and psychologists, because he may find some remedy with them. In doing that he must be patient, seek reward, remain chaste and keep quiet, and Allaah will decree reward for him in sha Allaah.

    Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in Majmoo’ al-Fataawa (10/133):

    If he is tested with love but he remains chaste and is patient, then he will be rewarded for fearing Allaah. It is known from shar’i evidence that if a person remains chaste and avoids haraam things in looking, word and deeds, and he keeps quiet about it and does not speak of it, so that there will be haraam talk about that, whether by complaining to another person or committing evil openly, or pursuing the beloved one in any way, and he is patient in obeying Allaah and avoiding sin, despite the pain of love that he feels in his heart, just as one who is afflicted with a calamity bears the pain of it with patience, then he will be one of those who fear Allaah and are patient, “Verily, he who fears Allaah with obedience to Him (by abstaining from sins and evil deeds, and by performing righteous good deeds), and is patient, then surely, Allaah makes not the reward of the Muhsinoon (good‑doers) to be lost” [Yoosuf 12:90]. End quote.
  2. louise_soso
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    louise_soso Junior Member

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    mashallah thnx for shareing this
  3. hayat_yahya
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    hayat_yahya Junior Member

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  4. Asja
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    Asja Pearl of Islaam

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    :salam2:

    Mashallah. May Allah bless you dear brother for sharing with us.

    :wasalam:
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    bari Junior Member

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    :salam2:

    Jazak Allah khairan. Very infomative.
  6. tariq353
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    tariq353 Junior Member

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    :salam2:

    jazak allahu khair....

    wa salam
  7. JenGiove
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    JenGiove Junior Member

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    :salam2:

    I'm sorry but I'm quite confused. Is this saying that loving your wife/husband is BAD?
  8. shaheeda35
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    shaheeda35 strive4Jannah

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    :ma:Jazakallahu Khairan!:hijabi:
  9. Asja
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    Asja Pearl of Islaam

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    No, it is not bad to love your husband, because it is halal relationship, which Allah has gave like a blessing.:shymuslima1: I think this is refering on not loving someone outiside of marriage, because that can lead to haram between man and women, and zina Astagfirullah. May Allah protect us from that. Ameen

    I hope Inshallah, it does not write nowhere in the post of brother " Abu Sarah" that it is wrong Astagfirullah. And Allah knows the best.
  10. JenGiove
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    JenGiove Junior Member

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    :salam2: Sweet Sister,



    That's a no-brainer....:)



    This is the part that concerned me the most and what I need help understanding:

    I hope someone is able to enlighten me cause something is just not making it easy for me to understand this. I can understand avoiding "falling in love" with someone who is not halal to you <though how you figure out if you want to marry that person if you don't know if you love him is still something I struggle to understand..but accept> but loving your wife/husband...even Mohammad loved Aisha and spoke about it publicly.
  11. Umm Abdullah
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    Umm Abdullah Junior Member

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    MashaAllah! Jazaak'Allah kheyr brother.
  12. Bawar
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    Bawar Struggling2Surrender

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    Just as sister JenGiov, I also struggle with the ibn Taymiah's opinion that one should not love even his/her spouse. This is perhaps his opinion rather than an Islamic fact.

    Secondly, issues of slavery and masters have been abolished by Islam before all other systems in the world then why is this article talking about husband being the master? Can you imagine running a peaceful family under the concept of master and slave instead of love in this day and age?

    I have to say, i disagree with the above two points.
  13. Asja
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    Asja Pearl of Islaam

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    I also hope that Inshallah, some brother or sister can explain better this issue of love between husband and wife, because I have to say that I dissagree with opinion of respected Sheikh of Islaam, as I have never find in Quraan or Sunnah that it is forbidden to love your husband, as there is nothing wrong in that Alhamdulilah, but it was left like something good and natural from Allah subhan wa teala.

    I belive it is only a opinion of Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (raheemehullah),and that it does not have its support in Quraan or Sunnah.

    And Allah and His messanger sallahu alayha wa saalam knows the best.

    May Allah guide us all.

    :wasalam:
  14. Aroosak
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    Aroosak Junior Member

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    Salaam

    I believe in this context it means that love for anything or anyone without being for the sake of Allah subhana wa t'ala would never lead to something good. Even when we have love for our spouse we should always do it with the foremost purpose to please Allah and to earn more blessings from Him. Same with all of our actions from the smallest to the greatest sacrifices inshAllah for Allah's sake only. :hijabi:
  15. MohammedMaksudul
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    MohammedMaksudul May Allah Forgive us

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    اسلام عليكم و الرحمت ا لله وا بركاته

    I guess you have missed this part. And probably the Sheikh tried to mean that no heart should love anything else more than Allah and a heart which is in filled with love of Allah has no enslavement to any other than Allah. And because of the love of Allah a man/woman will do what pleases Allah, which also includes loving one's family, mother, wife, etc. But if one's heart is filled more with the love of a human more than the love of Allah, then the heart will be biased towards that person which can lead to transgression. For example, a man loves his wife so much to that extent that it is stopping him from going to fight for the sake of Allah, which might have then become obligatory on him. If a person is in deep love with someone he/she might often overlook what is right or wrong to do for the sake of love towards the other person. Allah knows best.
  16. Asja
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    Asja Pearl of Islaam

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    Assalamu allaicum wa raahmatullah wa baarkatuhu

    May Allah reword you respected brother for your explination. Alhamdulillah I know that we should love our husband, mother, father, our family or other Muslims for the sake of Allah, because everything what we do for the sake of Allah it last for forever, while what is not done in His name it can never be good SubhanAllah. We Muslims are trought to do everything for Allah sake Only.

    Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in Rawdat al-Muhibbeen (147):

    If love occurs for a reason that is not haraam, the person is not to be blamed, such as one who loved his wife or slave woman, then he separated from her but the love remained and did not leave him. He is not to be blamed for that. Similarly if there was a sudden glance then he averted his gaze, but love took hold of his heart without him meaning it to, he must, however, ward it off and resist it. End quote.


    Dear brother, I was not refering on Sheikh Ibn al-Qayyim ( Raheemehullah) opinion , but I was cofused regarding the opinion of Sheikh Ibn Taymiyah
    ah ( rahmehullah) , which are completely diffrent, and Allah knows the best.But the most importante is that it is only a opinion,and that we have all answers in Quraan and Sunnah.


    Ibn Taymiyah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in Majmoo’ al-Fataawa (10/185):


    Attachment to the opposite sex will not happen to a heart that is filled with love of Allaah; it only affects a heart that is empty and weak, so it is able to gain control of it, then when it becomes strong and powerful it is able to defeat the love of Allaah and lead the person into shirk. Hence it is said: Love is the action of an empty heart.


    I need to say that I aslo dissagree with this fatwa and opinion of Sheikh Ibn Taymiyaah ( May Allah have mercy on him), as it is natural that one feel attachment to opposite gendre although that Muslim does love Allah, and that is why Allah subhan wa teala is ordering to us Muslims, to cover ourselves- for us Muslim women, to lower our gazes and not allowing free mixing of man and woman. May Allah forgive me if I could not understand this part as well,and increase our knowledge. Ameen summa ameen :tti_sister:

    :wasalam:

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