myself

[misalat]

My name is Kanini,i am 13 going 14 female. I was brought up in a Christian community but lately i've been started to doubt my faith. I need a guiding light because i dont know where i'm going or where i am supposed to go. There is a muslim and a muslima in my class at school. They are teaching me the basics of the arabic language. I found a Qu'ran on my bookshelf, i feel that Islam is my calling but im not sure. I have believed in Jesus Christ all my life but lately i dont know what i believe in. I have just seperated myself from the church and i spend time reading the Qu'ran and wearing my version of a hijab because my family is predominately Chistian. My family was shocked. My brothers made fun of my hijab and i felt bad inside because they did not accept me. I now wear it when im alone in my room and i read the Qu'ran in seclusion. I doubt they even know that i read the Qu'ran. Although I have never worn a piece of revealing clothing, now i cover neck down and i donnot wear armhole shirts. My mother says i am one of the very few respectable women in my community.At this present point in time i am unstable in faith. If i ask for truth, every religion is the truth. My choice though is between Christianity and Islam.Really and truly, i want the truth, the real truth. I donnot want to be lead astray by lies and betrayal. In my quest for the truth i was awakened to the fact that the Unitarian sect of the Christian faith is very close to Islam. I have never been so confused in all my thirteen years than like now. Many times i pray to God to reveal the truth to me but i dont know what happens. More now than ever i wished that there were a religion that was both Christian and Islam, but that is impossible because they contradict each other. I only want this because it is hard to decide between them both. If i dont make a decision, i will probably live my life in the way i think God sees fit.The choice is hard. And even if i do chose Islam, who would buy my clothes and my hadith and all the et ceteras. All i want is the truth and a guiding light, i already have God.

This is really touching words ... May Allah S.W.T. guide you to the straight path :tti_sister:

 

[Raed]

One thing i want to tell all christians... you wont lose jesus christ, anyone who dosent beleive in jesus (peace be upon him) and his mother Mary is not muslim, we believe in them we love them... he is prophet from allah and the last prophet who come after him is Mohammed PBUH

 

[shaz_1999]

People have given you very good advice

I just want to say that make sure whatever you do its what you want to do not what people are saying or making you do

It has to be true in your heart, follow what you belive

With the Internet and Inshallah the help of people from this website you have the world at your fingertips to find out what you want and then you will know in your heart what to do

Hope you are well and please ignore the things people say if they are hurting you dont ever break down in front of them, if its what you want to do just do it

I am here for you to support you in any way I can sister

 

[Muslim-]

Now i really believe that i should stick to being a christian an start goin back to church or something, because islam is a very difficult religion that has no sort of enjoyment. It focuses on the herafter so much that it tends to forget about the here and now. Islam was also birthed in a male dominant society which gives women no sort of rights or independence. I donnot want o become a muslim cos ppl will think i am makin a mockery of islam bcos of my ways and customs.I also wouldnot like to displease Allah by being a bad muslim. I know your way of livin and thinkin to u does not need any "modernisation" but it needs to be relaxed a little,tiny bit, but i have no authority and i am sure at least some ppl enjoy isalm, i hope.

Although i might not be a muslima or plan to be one i will still cling to this site and maybe some day i will be able to be a good muslim. But until that day comes, i will be either a christian(not likely) or a muslim who dresses,draws and mix with people like an "infidel" A.K.A a bad muslim. I will still read the quran , hadith, pray,etc. but i will not really call myself a muslim so i dont disgrace the name of islam. If Allah says im 2 be a muslim, ill b 1 if not so be it. I really want 2 enjoy life which islam doesnt allow


Hope Allah makes a clear definite say in this situation

Ameen

Kanini (fren who needs alot of guidance)

Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Your first post was very inspiring from a 13 year old, inspiring because you are trying to search for the truth.

If you look at what Islam brought, you say in a very male dominant society, then how was it, that Aisha (RA) could be a scholar (Aalima)...

At the end of the day in your first post you said you want to search for truth, so search for the truth sincerely, and leave the rest to Allah. Yes there will be difficulties, but that doesn't mean we stop believing. That's what tests are for.

Also it's better being a bad Muslim then a disbeliever. Because atleast when you declare Shahadah and become Muslim, you atleast believe in the truth.

Just follow the truth, and dont worry about what people call you, or start thinking about being a very good muslim.

Take the first step...we are human

 

[Bluegazer]

Hello Kanini,


There are several points [in your second post on this thread] that warrant an explanation.


1- You said the following:

mixing with males is haram exposing ANY part of the body is haram

You have to understand that if a woman conducts herself in an honourable way in front of men, and not be alone with them but be in a public space, then that's not considered forbidden.

For example, a woman wearing the hijab and loose clothing can go into the market and buy her needs, even if there are men in that market.

And the part of exposing "ANY" part of the body being forbidden needs further explanation. There's a difference of opinion even among knowledgeable and pious scholars about the need to cover the face. There are famous scholars [such as Muhammad Nassiruddin Al-Albani] who see that it's not an obligation for a woman to cover her face, but that if she does she will earn extra good deeds.


2- You posted the following:

A year ago dressing like a muslim as easy, but not now im 14. There are some things that u just cant dress modestly for. Running (atletics), swimming. Wearing somthing above ur knee is already violation and running is alot shorter that that. In the swimming pool nothing is allowed except the one pice or 2 piece bathing suit. I live in Barbados, a Caribbean island between North and South America, so it reallllly hot. Im not an Indian neither am i of Indian descent so if anyone c a black person wearin hijab, ur like some sorta outcast or omen. The indians i live here with would consider me an "indian wanna-be" and would never accept me into the muslim community. so if i did bcome a muslima i would have to go abroad to marry.

There are several points here:

a) Not being able to play some sports doesn't mean you can't turn to other sports. I'm sure you can find closed swimming pools and choose a time when only women swim. Also, you can walk in a fast pace instead of run. I'm sure there are other sports that don't involve forbidden acts in Islam.


b) If you think it's hot in Barbados, don't you think it was hot [and still is hot] in Mecca and in Arabia and North Africa? Practicing Muslim women there still wear the hijab.


c) If the Muslims there in Barbados accept you and welcome you as their sister in Islam, then that's great. But if -God forbid- they don't, then remember that accepting Islam is an act you do to please God Almighty alone and no one else. It is He who created you and it is He who will judge you on the Day of Judgment, not those Muslims in Barbados you're so concerned about. For Him to be pleased with you is more important than the pleasure of the entire population of this planet.


3- You posted the following:

Arabic is increasingly difficult 2 understand as bajan (corruption of english) being my mother tongue

You'll be required to know enough Arabic to perform the daily obligatory prayers, and that's achievable and has been done by many reverts to Islam who had absolutely no knowledge of the Arabic language before becoming Muslims.


4- You posted the following:

Now i really believe that i should stick to being a christian an start goin back to church or something, because islam is a very difficult religion that has no sort of enjoyment. It focuses on the herafter so much that it tends to forget about the here and now. Islam was also birthed in a male dominant society which gives women no sort of rights or independence. I donnot want o become a muslim cos ppl will think i am makin a mockery of islam bcos of my ways and customs.I also wouldnot like to displease Allah by being a bad muslim. I know your way of livin and thinkin to u does not need any "modernisation" but it needs to be relaxed a little,tiny bit, but i have no authority and i am sure at least some ppl enjoy isalm, i hope.


Although i might not be a muslima or plan to be one i will still cling to this site and maybe some day i will be able to be a good muslim. But until that day comes, i will be either a christian(not likely) or a muslim who dresses,draws and mix with people like an "infidel" A.K.A a bad muslim. I will still read the quran , hadith, pray,etc. but i will not really call myself a muslim so i dont disgrace the name of islam. If Allah says im 2 be a muslim, ill b 1 if not so be it. I really want 2 enjoy life which islam doesnt allow

There are several points here:

a) You said, "I really want 2 enjoy life which islam doesnt allow" and "Now i really believe that i should stick to being a christian an start goin back to church or something, because islam is a very difficult religion that has no sort of enjoyment. It focuses on the herafter so much that it tends to forget about the here and now."


Just because there are more restrictions in Islam and more emphasis on the hereafter doesn't mean that Islam doesn't allow us to enjoy this life. There are rules and limits in Islam, and within these limits, we are free to enjoy this life.


The following is an incident that happened to the Prophet [peace be upon him] which shows the moderation of the religion of Islam. I shall first post it in Arabic, then I'll post its translation into English, so that Arabic speaking brothers in Islam may correct the translation if I was mistaken:


جاء ثلاث رهط إلى بيوت أزواج النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم ، يسألون عن عبادة النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم ، فلما أخبروا كأنهم تقالوها ، فقالوا : أين نحن من النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم ؟ قد غفر الله له ما تقدم من ذنبه وما تأخر ، قال أحدهم : أما أنا فإني أصلي الليل أبدا ، وقال آخر : أنا أصوم الدهر ولا أفطر ، وقال آخر : أنا أعتزل النساء فلا أتزوج أبدا ، فجاء رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم فقال : ( أنتم الذين قلتم كذا وكذا ؟ أما والله أتي لأخشاكم لله وأتقاكم له ، لكني أصوم وأفطر ، وأصلي وأرقد ، وأتزوج النساء ، فمن رغب عن سنتي فليس مني )


A group of three men came to houses of the wives of the Prophet [peace be upon him] asking how the Prophet worshiped (Allah), and when they were informed about that, it's as if they thought it was little and said, "Where are we from the Prophet [peace be upon him] as his past and future sins have been forgiven."

Then one of them said, "I offer Salat (prayer) throughout the night forever."

The other said, "I observe Saum (fast) throughout the year and will not break my Saum."

The third said, "I keep away from the women and will not marry forever."


Allah's Messenger [peace be upon him] came and said, "Are you the same people who said so-and-so? By Allah, I am more afraid of Allah than you and [..........]; yet I observe Saum and also do not observe Saum, I do offer Salat and do sleep and I also marry women. So he who does not follow my Sunnah (legal ways) [in religion] is not from me (not one of my followers)."


[Collected by Al-Bukhari and Muslim and translated by Dr. Muhammad Muhsin Khan -with modifications by myself-, Al-Lu'lu'wal-Marjan..Arabic English, A Collection of Agreed upon Ahadith from Al-Bukhari and Muslim, Volume One, Hadith no. 885, pages 442-443, published by Dar-us-Salam Publications, Riyadh, Saudi Arabia, First Edition 1995 AD - 1416 AH]


The dotted lines between two brackets [........] is to show my inability to translate the phrase وأتقاكم له, since it also generally means the Prophet's fear of God Almighty, but there must be a subtle difference that I cannot translate.


God Almighty said:

" Indeed, Qarun was from the people of Moses, but he tyrannized them. And We gave him of treasures whose keys would burden a band of strong men; thereupon his people said to him, "Do not exult. Indeed, Allah does not like the exultant. But seek, through that which Allah has given you, the home of the Hereafter; and [yet], do not forget your share of the world. And do good as Allah has done good to you. And desire not corruption in the land. Indeed, Allah does not like corrupters." "

[Translation of the meanings of the Qur'an 28:76-77]


"Say, "Who has forbidden the adornment of Allah which He has produced for His servants and the good [lawful] things of provision?" Say, "They are for those who believe during the worldly life [but] exclusively for them on the Day of Resurrection." Thus do We detail the verses for a people who know. Say, "My Lord has only forbidden immoralities - what is apparent of them and what is concealed - and sin, and oppression without right, and that you associate with Allah that for which He has not sent down authority, and that you say about Allah that which you do not know." "

[Translation of the meanings of the Qur'an 7:32-33]


b) You said, "Islam was also birthed in a male dominant society which gives women no sort of rights or independence."


When Islam came, it forbade the killing of female newborn babies, it gave women the right to inherit and it limited the number of wives a man can marry to four. These are not the only positive changes Islam has brought to the status of women.


And what does the Bible have to say about women?

"I find more bitter than death
the woman who is a snare,
whose heart is a trap
and whose hands are chains.
The man who pleases God will escape her,
but the sinner she will ensnare."

Ecclesiastes 7:26 (New International Version)


"while I was still searching
but not finding—
I found one upright man among a thousand,
but not one upright woman among them all."

Ecclesiastes 7:28 (New International Version)


The following is what Paul wrote, and its recorded in the Bible:

"A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent. For Adam was formed first, then Eve. And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the woman who was deceived and became a sinner."

1 Timothy 2:11-14 (New International Version)


What did God Almighty say about this matter?


"And "O Adam, dwell, you and your wife, in Paradise and eat from wherever you will but do not approach this tree, lest you be among the wrongdoers." But Satan whispered to them to make apparent to them that which was concealed from them of their private parts. He said, "Your Lord did not forbid you this tree except that you become angels or become of the immortal." And he swore [by Allah ] to them, "Indeed, I am to you from among the sincere advisors." So he made them fall, through deception. And when they tasted of the tree, their private parts became apparent to them, and they began to fasten together over themselves from the leaves of Paradise. And their Lord called to them, "Did I not forbid you from that tree and tell you that Satan is to you a clear enemy?" They said, "Our Lord, we have wronged ourselves, and if You do not forgive us and have mercy upon us, we will surely be among the losers."

[Translation of the meanings of the Qur'an 7:19-23]


I'd also like to add the following verses of the Qur'an:

"Indeed, the Muslim men and Muslim women, the believing men and believing women, the obedient men and obedient women, the truthful men and truthful women, the patient men and patient women, the humble men and humble women, the charitable men and charitable women, the fasting men and fasting women, the men who guard their private parts and the women who do so, and the men who remember Allah often and the women who do so - for them Allah has prepared forgiveness and a great reward."

[Translation of the meanings of the Qur'an 33:35]


"And their Lord responded to them, "Never will I allow to be lost the work of [any] worker among you, whether male or female; you are of one another."

[Translation of the meanings of the Qur'an 3:195]


"The believing men and believing women are allies of one another. They enjoin what is right and forbid what is wrong and establish prayer and give zakah and obey Allah and His Messenger. Those - Allah will have mercy upon them. Indeed, Allah is Exalted in Might and Wise."

[Translation of the meanings of the Qur'an 9:71]


There's even a verse in the Qur'an which shows how God Almighty directly responded to a Muslim woman's prayer:


"Certainly has Allah heard the speech of the one who argues with you, [O Muhammad], concerning her husband and directs her complaint to Allah . And Allah hears your dialogue; indeed, Allah is Hearing and Seeing."

[Translation of the meanings of the Qur'an 58:1]



c) You said, " I donnot want o become a muslim cos ppl will think i am makin a mockery of islam bcos of my ways and customs.I also wouldnot like to displease Allah by being a bad muslim." and, "But until that day comes, i will be either a christian(not likely) or a muslim who dresses,draws and mix with people like an "infidel" A.K.A a bad muslim."


The greatest sin is refusing to enter the religion of Islam. A "bad" Muslim is still a Muslim. If this Muslim repents before he dies, God will forgive him. If he does not, and his sins outweigh his good deeds, then it is up to God Almighty. He may forgive him and admit him to Paradise, or He may punish him in Hell. But a Muslim who does enter Hell will not abide there forever. He will serve a certain time there, and then will be released from Hell and will enter Heaven. Mind you, I'm not in any way belittling the punishment of Hell. Any sane person will try to avoid even one second in Hell.


A non Muslim who has received the message of Islam in its true form and then dies as a non Muslim will enter Hell forever.


So, a bad Muslim is most importantly still a Muslim, and he's in a much better condition than any non Muslim.


In the end, I leave you with the following verses of the Qur'an:

"Say, [O Muhammad], "If your fathers, your sons, your brothers, your wives, your relatives, wealth which you have obtained, commerce wherein you fear decline, and dwellings with which you are pleased are more beloved to you than Allāh and His Messenger and jihād [i.e., striving] in His cause, then wait until Allāh executes His command. And Allāh does not guide the defiantly disobedient people."

[Translation of the meanings of the Qur'an 9:24]


Regards,

Bluegazer

 

[Min-Fadhli-Rabii]

Hi Kanini,
I believe is God who is guiding to search for the truth...coz there so many people of your age and older than you ,they are not searching for the truth.
If you want to know the true religion,one way is by watching vidoes on youtube of debates between Islam and non-islamic religion by Ahmad Deedat ,Dr Zaik Naik .

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lYYjoOFlzvE

Also you can visit these website about comparative religion:

http://www.beautifulislam.net/

http://www.irf.net/irf/main.htm

http://www.usc.edu/dept/MSA/fundamentals/pillars/

http://www.beautifulislam.net/


God bless you.