Suggestions Please

[aDYiNGdream]

:salam2:

Ever since my father passed away a couple of years ago, my family has gradually drifted apart. I realize now that he was the glue that stuck us together and may Allah grant him Jannatul Firdaws for that Ameen.
I want to change this and patch up the gaps that seem to be growing especially between my brothers. SO i thought of holding regular family meetings so we can discuss problems and try to resolve them as a family. The thing is I need help in starting it off....what should it consist of besides just the complaining? the organization? should i assign things to each member? stuff like that....any suggestions are welcome and much appreciated. JazakAllah Khair in advance.

 

[IbnAlAawam]

:salam2:

May Allah have clemence on your father. Why not also organise meetings where you will not necessarily discuss serious matters?

Why not go on holiday together too? Buy a holiday home or use the family home maybe?

If your family members are not pro-active, someone might have to be the pro-active one for the family: Being the link between your siblings, the new motor of the family. But you will need the good will of your family too.
So, loads of communication works...

 

[Durriyyah]

:salam2:

I would stick to more positive things when trying to join your family together. No one WANTS to get together to discuss difficult issues or complaints. Get the kids together or try to find something else that is fun. Get it in your routine to get everyone together once a month or so. Serious issues will come up on their own... take the time to try and enjoy each other!

:muslim_child:

 

[Aapa]

Salaam,

The process of grieving is very individual. People have different coping mechanisms. Some need company and others need to be very private. Among siblings it is difficult to talk openly. Each child has a significant and very private realtionship with his parent. Give your siblings a little space.
What my brother and sister and I do when we have a chance to be together is the three of us visit the gravesite. We do not take anyone else. This is our private time. We take flowers and burn incense. We unite as children of our father for a brief moment. We forget we are all middle-aged with our own responsibilites. It becomes a very special moment. It is only a moment. And then we go to a Pakistani resturant that he loved. This is very infrequent but it is a bonding experience...we hardly talk while we are at cemetary.
I am sharing this with you just as an idea.

 

[alkathiri]

:salam2:

I can just give you encouragement.

Dont give up sis ... When the going gets tough , the tough gets going.
May god make it easy for you