THINGS ONLY A MOM CAN TEACH

suryani

Junior Member
:SMILY335:
My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION:
"Just wait until your father gets home."

My Mother taught me about RECEIVING:
"You are going to get it when we get home!"

My Mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE:
"What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you... Don't talk back to me!!"

My Mother taught me LOGIC:
"Because I said so, that's why."
&
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

My Mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE:
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

My Mother taught me to THINK AHEAD:
"If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a good job."

My Mother taught me ESP:
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you're cold?"

My Mother taught me HUMOR:
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT:
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

My Mother taught me about GENETICS:
" You're just like your father."

My Mother taught me about my ROOTS:
"Do you think you were born in a barn?" OR
"Close the door, do we look like we live in barn?"

My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE:
"When you get to be my age, you will understand."

My Mother taught me about JUSTICE:
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you. Then you'll see what it's like."

My Mother taught me RELIGION:
"You better pray that it will come out of the carpet."

My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL:
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

My mother taught me FORESIGHT:
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

My mother taught me IRONY:
"Keep crying and I'll *give* you something to cry about."

My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS:
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"

My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM:
"Will you *look* at the dirt on the back of your neck!"

My mother taught me about STAMINA:
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is finished."

My mother taught me about WEATHER:
"It looks as if a tornado swept through your room."

My mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS: "If I yelled because
I saw a meteor coming toward you, would you listen then?"

My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY:
"If I've told you once, I've told you a million times: Don't Exaggerate!!!"

My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE:
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

My mother taught me about BEHAVIOUR MODIFICATION:
"Stop acting like your father!"

My mother taught me about ENVY:
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!"
 

Sister_X

Junior Member
mashaAllah this list is funny...These are very famous with my mother, may Allah grant her a house paradise.

:

My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE:
"When you get to be my age, you will understand."
..........
My Mother taught me about JUSTICE:
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you. Then you'll see what it's like." .......

...................
My mother taught me IRONY:
"Keep crying and I'll *give* you something to cry about."

Thanks for sharing that.
 

umm hussain

Junior Member
Asalam alaikum

That is so hilarious, trust me I do not normally find 'jokes' funny but I can relate to a lot of those so maybe that is why, from my mum and what I say to my children as well.
 

samiha

---------
Staff member
Assalamu alaykum.

Yea and Masha'allah, I love them sooo much. May Allah reward all the Mothers in the world for all they do!

nice though... :)

wasalam
 

Jihan

Junior Member
so true and funny... i fond this to be the funniest because i just realized that's the sort of things my nother used on me as a child:
&
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
 

rony

Junior Member
As-salam, it's really funny and true. I believe all mom's are same. They always teach us something. Allah made them the best teacher of this world.
 

Aapa

Mirajmom
Salaam,


And to this day when I am unsure in this world the first person I call is :
mummy
mommy
mama
amma

because of all the varities of love we know..this is the most unselfish..excuse me while I go call her...
 

umm hussain

Junior Member
Some more really funny ones I think are
'if you keep jumping around/doing that and you hurt yourself you better not cry because I will smack you really hard because I have already told you stop.

Being told to stop crying just after getting a good whacking or else you will get another one ...lol?

Back home we used to be told to go and pick our own tree branch to be hit with and if you pick a small one be guaranteed that you will be sent to break off a bigger one after being threatened with the back of the hand if you do not. lol...

My mum once said I will hit you so hard you will get out through the window, well I guess due to the impact of the punch.lol...I started laughing and so did she.

If my sister got a beating and we started laughing or rubbing it in we would surely get our share. She{my mum that is} would then turn to the laughing ones and say something like 'what are you laughing at, don't you feel sorry for your sister, what sort of person has no love for their sibling' and then beat us up as well.

Don't you just hate it when they tell you to wait till dad comes home and mom calls for me, in this case to explain to my dad what I have actually done...lol..Where do you start when you know which ever way you expalin it the beating is due. If you dont speak loud enough you are told to repeat and stop crying because he cant hear you properly and he has not even done anything yet but of course you know that as soon as he has finished eating he surely will.

I remember my dad saying to my sister 'don't worry your leg will be fine when you get to school' after she came up with some of her many excuses to miss school and it miraculously healed when she found she had no option but to go to school.

LOL, good old days. I am laughing now but it was not so funny when it was happening and definitely no hard feelings to my parents. I love them to bits they only wanted the best and I see myself doing/saying what my mum and in some cases dad used to do.

Oh yeah this reminds me as well, when my hubby sent his mom some money and after about a week he phoned to find out how things were and the conversation turned to something like 'just because you are sending me the money now you think you can tell me what to buy...lol basically just know I used the money and how I spent it should not be an issue you spent a lot of my money when you were growing up
 

Albint_Almuslima

Im Proud 2 B Me!
suryani; said:
My mother taught me IRONY:
"Keep crying and I'll *give* you something to cry about."[/qoute]


Yo!! This woman is MAD GHETTO!!! Thats what im talking about!!

If u aint crying for a reason i will give u a reason to cry for!! LOL
 

wannabe_muttaqi

A MUSLIM BROTHER
Funny post.........after reading the posts i feel all Mom's are the same.

May ALLAH SWT make all the kids to love and respect their mom. Ameen.
 
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