What should i do about this person??

sitifatimah84

New Member
Assalamualaikum WBT...

Hope all my sisters and brothers are in the best of health and iman...

I need your advice regarding this issue..


There is 1 of my colleague (non muslim) who is interested to marry me. He is 28yr old working in the same college with me. The day he saw me, my attitude n behavior towards other people, make him to fall in love with me. He said that he wants to marry me and willing to convert to islam (only if i promise to marry him).

He has change a little bit.. he stop going to temple, stop wearing red thread in his hand, stop wearing gold chain... i gave him some quran recitation video n he is listening to it... he said that he will do everything (praying, fasting, reading quran n etc) in future if he marry me. but the problem is that i am afraid how if he didnot do what he promise (regarding praying, fasting n etc)...

I did ask him, what if i didnt marry him, is he stil will convert to islam?? He said no.. He said the reason he convert is to marry me. If i didnt agree to marry him, he wont convert to islam. I know that if ALLAH opens heart of the person to embrace islam, definitely the person will do..

I dun have affection nor feelings towards him as i am searching for a soul mate that can guide me soo much in my deen ( i really want to be good and knowledgable in my deen).. now my question is what shoud i do about this person? Will i get sin bcoz i didnt agree to him?? Will i be questioned why i didnot make him to embrace to islam??

I did mention this issue to my parents and they said if he is really a good muslim (practising islam well), then they agree...but the problem is that he is not ikhlas to embrace islam.. he wants to convert if i agree to marry him... I am really really confuse.. This issue really make me feel worry,sad n etc...Please can somebody give advice/suggesstion regarding this issue?? I really really appreciate all your reply.. Thank you soo much...
 

aisha16

Junior Member
You should go with your heart. Know that might sound cheesy though...if you want to marry him marry him. You can't judge his intention...even though this is common...for men/women say they wanna convert just to marry a Muslim. Make istikaara...hope you make your best decision..
 

ilyas_eh

Used to be active here!
Shaytan is clearly playing with your weakness. If guidance is written for him, Islaam will come to him, no matter what.I dont know why you come to think that you will be a sinner. Think about it, a person doesnt realize the beauty/ truth of islaam but is ready to accept it just to marry you. what if tomorrow, naudhbillah, you get married to that guy and he doesn't find what he wanted with that new life of yours? Sometimes we have to be clever dear sister. You in your heart clearly know that this person is not your soul mate. They why give a second thought about this person? Forget him sister. may Allah give you the most pious and the most handsome guy.

I'm going to sound like a grandpa but the recent happenings are just scary. In an indian state, a person married a muslim girl and he converted, apparently. Then his old friends who are also part of some extremist organization slowly brainwashed him and to such an extent that he allowed his friends to come into his home and ill-behave with his wife. they even forced the poor muslimah to convert. the poor sister had to live with it until she have had enough.So she chose islaam over her husband and came back to her parents. But at the cost of what? She was married to this guy and had children with him. now may Allah protect her and her children.
 

Sister Zohra

Junior Member
Assalamu Alaikum,

I agree with brother Ilyas.

It's simple. He's not a Muslim and only wants to convert because of his infatuation towards you. Marrying him would not make sense. You are right to leave him. If he (sincerely) reverts to Islam and then asks to marry you, then there would be reason to consider his offer.
 

ahsanq8

Member
Assalamu Alaikum,

I agree with brother Ilyas.

It's simple. He's not a Muslim and only wants to convert because of his infatuation towards you. Marrying him would not make sense. You are right to leave him. If he (sincerely) reverts to Islam and then asks to marry you, then there would be reason to consider his offer.

he is a big shaitan .sister don’t marriage please now a days there is a Hindu society which deceiving Muslim girl by making her fool so please take care
 

muslimah2012

New Member
Assalamu alaikum sister
this isnt a question unless he becomes muslim
and becareful of those who become muslim just to marry
ofcourse you dont know whats in someones heart ... but the actions of their limbs is a good place to start looking
Allahu alem
 

kalamazoo

'Millat "IBRAHIM" {AleyhiSalaam}
Assalamualaikum WBT...

Hope all my sisters and brothers are in the best of health and iman...

I need your advice regarding this issue..


There is 1 of my colleague (non muslim) who is interested to marry me. He is 28yr old working in the same college with me. The day he saw me, my attitude n behavior towards other people, make him to fall in love with me. He said that he wants to marry me and willing to convert to islam (only if i promise to marry him).

He has change a little bit.. he stop going to temple, stop wearing red thread in his hand, stop wearing gold chain... i gave him some quran recitation video n he is listening to it... he said that he will do everything (praying, fasting, reading quran n etc) in future if he marry me. but the problem is that i am afraid how if he didnot do what he promise (regarding praying, fasting n etc)...

I did ask him, what if i didnt marry him, is he stil will convert to islam?? He said no.. He said the reason he convert is to marry me. If i didnt agree to marry him, he wont convert to islam. I know that if ALLAH opens heart of the person to embrace islam, definitely the person will do..

I dun have affection nor feelings towards him as i am searching for a soul mate that can guide me soo much in my deen ( i really want to be good and knowledgable in my deen).. now my question is what shoud i do about this person? Will i get sin bcoz i didnt agree to him?? Will i be questioned why i didnot make him to embrace to islam??

I did mention this issue to my parents and they said if he is really a good muslim (practising islam well), then they agree...but the problem is that he is not ikhlas to embrace islam.. he wants to convert if i agree to marry him... I am really really confuse.. This issue really make me feel worry,sad n etc...Please can somebody give advice/suggesstion regarding this issue?? I really really appreciate all your reply.. Thank you soo much...


asalaam aleykum

sister;
siti fatima 84

With No doubt You are well aware of your DIN ;
and as stated because he wants you; and YOU want him otherwise he will have no power to force you.
Therefore as safe precautions Please Heed parents advices.

Allah Maaki
 

hayat84

I'm not what you believe
:salam2:
when the moment will come,your heart will speak for you.if I were at your place,I would haven't accepted any purposal of marriage from a guy who tries to "enchant" you with the old story of "you are beautiful,I like what you like,I'll do anything for you",'cause many times it is a trick to make you fall in love of the wrong person.it happened to me in the past,when I was attracted from the material and not from the spiritual.
sister,that guy maybe when you'll be married with him won't never practise Islam,maybe he'll restart wearing gold chains and he'll teach hip hop music to his children.you as muslimah must have more that 2 eyes,'cause your beautiness has amazed that guy,he maybe doesnt love you,he maybe feels those stomach pains when he looks at you because he wishes to obtain something else.
even if in the Quran is written that a man must be muslim,nowhere is written that you should accept his purposal,if you don't like him.if you want to risk,it's difficult to come back to your steps.be an example of Imaan and don't be too close to this guy,'cause Shaytan awaits for a your false-step:wasalam:
 

sitifatimah84

New Member
Thank you soo soo much for all ur replies my dear sister n brothers :)...

Alhamdullillah.I am very very greatful for the kind advice, suggestions and heart touching wishes :). All of you made me to 'open my eyes' now.. Really this issue borthering me so much, but now after reading all your advices, it is a great relieve :).. Now i can happily ignore & avoid him...InsyaALLAH will do what is the best for me and my deen :)..

Jazakallahukhair and thank you soo much again :)
 

a_stranger

Junior Member
:salam2:

Dear sister sometimes when a man like a woman he promise to do anything to get her but when he get her things will be different , to practice Islam to pray ....to fast need a true Iman and a good satisfaction ........it is clear that this man don't have such motivation ........so no don't marry him. May Allah guide all of us to his way.
 

rahman2040

Junior Member
:salam2:
sister u have given Dawa of Islam to him,,, thats enough. now he is questionable in hereafter.
i dont think that excuse of him is a valid one. i can sense his heart is not alighted even now, true heart would have accepted truth till now.
 
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