brother, the prophet (saw) is a very kind and generous righteous person, if you say what you just typed, its enough and a very nice gift and he will forgive you because he will trust that the opportunity of you being able to see him will change you.
what, you think those who have a beard , mustaches, trouser upper than the ankel, quran etc, do you think those who have one or 2 or all of this to offer the prophet (saw), do you think they are perfect or what is the word to use, very good people, no brother, not all of them are. some of them are the best of us, but most of these people you will find are sheikhs. but the ones who do it for sunnah and show islam from the outside but not from the inside, im sure the prophet (saw) dont want them.
but you seem to have islam inside, inside is more important than outside. your heart, offer the prophet (saw) your heart, what you said, shows your iman inside. give him your personality, give him the shame you feel about not doing enough for islam, its better than giving him beard, mustaches, trousers etc, coz thats from your heart. beard, mustaches, trousers is just to show you follow sunnah, but if you dont have this doesnt mean you dont follow sunnah of the prophet (saw).
to all out there, accept who you are, and say 'i will offer the prophet (saw) my heart, my shame, my personality and the kind things i do for my family and friends' islam is not just about following quran and praying etc, its also about how you treat you family, friends, pets, relatives, poor, your job etc. im sure we all are mature enough and do practice all this.
lol, i said this but havent watched the video, i'll watch it now inshallah.
salam to all.