:salam2:
Some of you know me that im a pretty depressing person (dont let my profile picture fool you for what I really am ). Today I had a physics test which I failed which made me a more depressing person . At the start of junior year i made a commitment to study harder which I did . This test If you taught it to a 3 year old he would pass it , its very easy . The reason why I failed it is because I plugged in all the data ( and there were so many of them ) and when finish putting everything I decided to review everything in the table data and then I found something wrong and I was shocked and starting to freak out because one wrong then everything is . Which means I have to erase everything and do the whole calculations again and I freaked out because there were other stuff I had to do on the test that I didnt do yet and didnt have time . And then I found another mistake on the data which made my feelings drain . From then onwards I knew I was going to fail and all because of a simple calculation error .
Weeks before the test I asked allah to help me in my junior year (because its a very important year ) , even this morning when I prayed fajr I asked allah to help me so why allah didnt help me by finding this mistake sooner then later . It was because of that simple mistake I failed the test . So why allah didnt make me notice the error sooner before . I wonder If this was a test from allah . If it is why test me on a school test ? why dont test me like make me loose my ipod or money ?
Im really sad now guys . now I know the urging feeling to commit suicide . This school year is very important to me I cannot do bad this year and this test just made me feel like jumping of a building .
And also why doesnt allah answer my prayers on personal ones . Ive been asking for this dua for at least 2 years and allah has never answered
it and still asking allah for it . Its not a possesion or anything like that , that im asking for , its something in my mind that I want allah to fix . I cant do anything to fix it nor can doctors so only allah can because I think hes the one who made that way . So why when I ask the same dua for so long and allah doesnt answer it ?
and please bro/sis answer my first question to thx
:salam2:
:salam2:
i understand what you are going through right now. many of us have experienced periods of depression. one thing that i learned is that there is somebody always doing worse than we are. and that we have much to be thankful for. at times my iman can weaken a bit, but alhamdulillah it get's strong again when i think about what ALLAH SWT has given me. currently we are in the month of ramadan, we are blessed by this. can you imagine how many people that have lost their souls wish they could be alive to fast on this year's ramadan? there have been many things that i have prayed for that ALLAH SWT has not given me, yet at the same time there have been many things that have been answered. but most importantly brother we have to understand and accept the will of ALLAH SWT. it was my dream to be a lawyer, but i am now 28 years old, i have bills, have a job, and i've dropped out of college. i undestand and i accept that it isn't the will of ALLAH SWT to make me a lawyer. yet, my life is still good, i can still say alhamdulillah because i do have bills, but i have a job that i can afford to pay my bills, and i make good money for not having finished college. i would be making much more as an attorney, but i have everything i need with what ALLAH SWT has provided.
brother don't think about suicide. is life so bad that the hellfire would be a relief? dear brother you know better than this. i have read many of your posts and i know that you are brilliant. remember this: a person that has suffered much in this life that finally gets entrance into jannah will be asked if he ever suffered in this life; and he will say no. just think of the man that has had everything but died an unbeliever or a sinner, he will be sent to the hellfire and will be asked if he ever received any good in his life, and he will reply that he had not. dear brother my point is that we have to be able to say alhamdulillah during our good times and during calamity.
