i wanted to share something with you

nyerekareem

abdur-rahman
:salam2:

this is a story that i wanted to share with you all here. it's a personal story, but it's a story that i feel is important to share. isha'ALLAH it may help someone who may be in the position that i have been in.

as a muslim, i have been taught that i should always be grateful for my life and for everything that i have. whether i have much or if i have little. that i should praise ALLAH SWT during the good times and the bad.

even though that i know these things, at times i find myself failing to implement these concepts in my life. so what happens to me then? i begin to get jealous of those that have much, i lose faith when calamity strikes me, and i fall deeper and deeper into sin and fitna.

while all of this is taking place; the sinning and losing of iman; i am trying to figure out why ALLAH SWT isn’t answering my supplications, my tearful pleas. it had been going for some time before realizing something very important. i realized that i needed to look into the mirror and analyze myself. what i found out was that i was indeed a hypocrite. i believed in everything that this beautiful way of life; the way of islam, however i was or had been doing things contrary to islam. all this time, i had failed to realize how blessed i truly was to have been exposed to the haqq of islam, yet while being shown the road to paradise; i was still driving down the road to hellfire.

so i began thinking about the definition of islam and muslim. i knew that they really meant to submit and one who submits. you see, i was a muslim in my belief, but i wasn’t a muslim in practice. that isn’t the way that ALLAH SWT wants mankind to be. if i’m splitting the two, that means that i’m fighting; which would be the opposite of submission. things weren’t going my way in life because i was failing to do something very important. the thing that i was forgetting was that i need to submit to ALLAH SWT. then and only then can i really be a muslim and please ALLAH SWT. the main thing with this submission, is that it requires our trust in ALLAH SWT. i believed in ALLAH SWT. i was never an atheist, but i needed to BELIEVE IN ALLAH SWT.

why would ALLAH SWT, hear my prayers and grant me things when i have been disobedient to Him? upon realizing all of this, my faith has increased. it has increased because i know that all i have to do is submit and place my trust in ALLAH SWT. when we ask ourselves why has so much bad befallen us, let’s be honest with ourselves and look in the mirror and ask ourselves if we have really been submitting ourselves.

insha’ALLAH i hope that ALLAH SWT keeps me close and ever mindful of my need to submit to Him and that all muslims keep their iman strong or strengthen their weak iman. ameen
:wasalam:
 

sky_012

Junior Member
SubhanAllah sister

My most sincere thanks to you for posting and sharing your story with us here

you are truely blessed Mashallah you have realized it, and are sharing it with us, im going through the same phase and i feel i should start looking at myself, really your story is an eye opener for me and i pray Allah SWT Guide me as well, sothat i can proudly say, im submitted to ALlah


Allah SWT bless you dear sis

:wasalam:
 

nyerekareem

abdur-rahman
:salam2:

jazakallah khayr for your replies. i had been having so many problems and have been very depressed and it had been taking me out of practicing islam. when things were going well for me, i was praying five times a day and everything else that we muslims are obligated to do. however, when things went bad or weren't going my way, i didn't pray or anything as if i were telling ALLAH SWT that if he wasn't giving me what i wanted, i wasn't going to give Him what he wanted from me. i was actually challenging ALLAH SWT and actually believing that i could win. :astag: i wasn't doing that intentionally, but my behavior definitely showed that's what it was.

i think about surah inshirah, because it kind of touches on how we pray or ask for things when we are in need and how when our needs our granted, we shouldn't forget the remembrance of ALLAH SWT.

thank you all again.
:wasalam:
 
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