Hope this helps..
Iddat
by Mufti Ebrahim Desai, Darul Ifta – Madrasah In'aamiyyah, Camperdown; www.ask-imam.com
Things Not Permissible During Iddat
A woman observing the Iddat of death should neither go out of the house nor remarry, nor indulge in beautifying herself through make-up. During Iddat, all these things are Haraam (Forbidden) for her.
Hadith
The Holy Prophet (Sallallahu Alayhi wa sallam) has said that it is not permissible for a believer to mourn for anyone for more than three days, except the widow whose period of mourning (when not pregnant) on the death of her husband is four months and ten days.
Observing a Period of Mourning is Waajib
RULES:
* It is necessary (Waajib) upon every adult and sane Muslim woman to observe Iddat (mourn) the death of her husband. It is not necessary upon a woman who is a disbeliever, insane or did not attain puberty.
* It is Haraam (strictly prohibited) to make an express proposal of marriage to a woman observing the Iddat of Death. It is also Haraam to contract a Nikah with such a woman. Such a nikah will be null and void.
* It is Haraam upon a female observing Iddat to apply perfume; to don ornaments, jewellery or decorations of any sort; to wear eye makeup, such as Kohl (antimony) or galena; to chew or apply colour on the lips, teeth or gums; to apply oil on the head; to comb the hair (in order to beautify herself); to use henna; to wear silken or other gaudy dresses.
* It is permissible to bath and wash the hair during Iddat.
Using Beauty Aids as Medicine
RULES:
* If there is a need to apply oil to the head because of a headache or lice, only such oil may be used that has no scent.
* If there is a need to use Surma (antimony) as a balm for the eyes, it will be permissible. In such a case it should be applied at night and cleared in the morning.
*A female in Iddat will be excused to wear silken clothes due to itchy skin.
Leaving the Home Due to Necessity
* It is compulsory upon the divorcee or widow to complete the Iddat in the same home which was her permanent residence at the time of divorce or her husband's demise. However, if does not have enough money to pay basic needs, shelter and food, she will be excused to leave the house during daytime to work. She should ensure that she adheres to the laws of Hijaab and spends the nights at her house. It is also imperative that, during the day, she returns home immediately upon being free from her work. Spending any time outside the house over and above that which is necessary is not permissible. If her employment takes up some part of the night as well, she will be excused, but she should spend the major part of the night at her own home.
* A woman who owns a cultivated land, farm, property or business which requires her personal attention and management and there is no family member available to assist her, she will be excused to leave the house.
If such a place is equivalent to the distance of Safar (88 kms. or more), then she may travel there with her Mahram (person with whom marriage is permanently unlawful).
* If a woman observing the Iddat of Death is ill and it is not possible to arrange for a house-call by a physician, or if there arises an emergency for her admission to a hospital, it will be permissible to take her to a hospital or another city if there is a need.
Shifting Residence During Iddat Under Compelling Circumstances
RULES:
* woman may move to another home in order to complete the Iddat in the following situations:
* If the house was rented and she does not have the means to pay the rent.
* If her share of the house which she had inherited from her husband is insufficient for her to live in and the other inheritors do not allow her to use their share.
* If she cannot observe Purdah in the home.
* Any such situation in which her life, wealth or chastity are not safe.
* If the house in which she is observing Iddat collapses, or there be the danger that it will.
* If there is a strong apprehension that she is likely to lose her honour, life, property or health if she stays there.
* If she fears living alone and she does not have a trustworthy person to live with her. If the fear is not severe, then it will not be permissible to move out of the house.
* Similarly, if the house in which she is passing her Iddat be haunted and she has a strong fear of demons, so much so that she cannot bear the very thought of living in a haunted house, or there is some open evidence of harm caused by such evil presence.
In a situation where shifting from the house of Iddat is permissible, it is necessary the woman shift to the closest possible house where her life, wealth and chastity are safe. Unless necessary, she should not move to a more distant house. She should pass the remaining days of her Iddat in the house to which she shifted.
A Woman on Journey at the Time of Her Husband's Demise
Different situations have different rulings, the details of which follow:
* If a woman receives the news of her husband's death, whilst she is on Safar and was within 88 km from her hometown, she should immediately return home and complete her Iddat there, irrespective of how far her destination is. This applies whether or not she has a Mahram with her.
* If she had already covered 88km, then
A).If her destination is within 88 km, she may continue her Safar and upon reaching the destination, she should complete her Iddat there, whether or not she has a Mahram with her.
B).If her destination is more than 88 km away and
a).if the place is uninhabited she has the choice of either returning to her hometown or continuing her journey to her destination and complete her Iddat there. It is advisable for her to return to her hometown.
b).if it is an inhabited place where she could stay, she should remain there.
* If in case no. II.B.1, en route to her hometown or her destination, she passes by such an inhabited town where she could stay and her life, wealth and modesty are safe, she should stay there and complete her Iddat.
Negligence of Iddat
Many widows and divorced women do not observe the laws of Iddat. Going out openly, visiting Bazaars and attending social functions are activities undertaken in absolute disregard to this injunction of the Shariah. That is a major sin.
Leaving the House Without a Sharíi Reason
The excuses under which going out of the house during Iddat are permissible have been listed earlier on. If a situation of a different nature arises under which going out of the house appears to be necessary, the situation should be discussed with a trustworthy Aalim in order to ascertain the Shar'ee validity of the excuse.
Many women observing Iddat leave the house on flimsy excuses, such as to show up at a meeting, ceremony, function, etc.
Going Out in Iddat Without Valid Excuse Does Not Annul the Iddat
Some people assume that the Iddat of a widow who comes out of the house without a valid excuse breaks the Iddat and it would be necessary for her to commence her Iddat again. That is incorrect.