LoL Assalamu Alyku msister Isra, it's been a while now. I've always meant to PM you for a couple of weeks now, but I thought I made you get upset after what I said long time ago, and I thought you were still going to be upset with me so I haven't talked to you. During those days, I was going on a a low Eman, untill I finally rose up, and I rose up against Fitnah like what I've always wanted to do, but I never was able to completely stop it. The thing with Fitnah at my school is that I'm tired as heck by the end of the day, and then my mind beomes a target for Waswas and I just felt so weak in my head that I couldnm't stop it from plunging into my head. But Mashallah it was last wek when I sincerely asked Allah to firgive me for whatever I've done and then through tears I asked Allah to help me, to make my Eman stronger, to make me call for him when I need help in my Eman, and to lift me up when I feel like I'm going down.
So then it was Monday when I was in school (yesterday as we call it LoL) and then during the end of the day as useal, my head was spinning Waswas plunging into my head, into my mind, I put my head in my hands and asked Allah that I'm in a tiem most distressed, to help me and bring me up in his light, and to make my mind get stronger and my Eman (which goes low when my mind espeically feels weak) and so at that instant, I felt the spinning stopping and I felt better. Mashallah from now on I got a great weapon that I can use when something's whispering in my mind. I call on Allah my Rabb and my Aziz (and my Habib) to help me.
Subahanallah my Eman stays strong from now on and my head (and mind) doesn't feel weak for long anymore, and all the time Allah's bringing me up Subhanallah.
Assalamu Alykum, Jazakallah Kyr for your duas.
