Agree or ???

[revert2007]

Assalamualikum.This is my opinion and I do not want anyone to comment on my post.I am really tired of this whole situation of objecting.

Some of my friends are doctors and eventually they gave up their job once they got married. Their husband do not have problem with it but the reason they gave up is that their knowledge in Islam increased and they realised that no matter how smart a woman is,her job is in the house and not outside the house.You can study whatever you want because it is obligatory to seek knowledge.

But in the end you have to give up your job to raise you children and take care of your husband.

On the day of judgement,Allah is not gonna question the women how many patients did she cure or saved. He will question your duty as a wife and as a mother.Did u feed ur husband well?did u feed ur kids well?did u clean ur house well?

The key to enter jannah through her husband.

A woman who let her kids being raised by baby sitter or let the maid to do the cleaning and cooking,do u think she can enter jannah?

Then what is the purpose of being married in the first place?

Each of us have responsibility.so we should do our responsibility first.

our job is to raise the family,and men's job is to work and bring money.

Am not saying that all female doctors are bad but am alarming u that it is time for changes.

get prepared to be questioned on the day of Judgement.

If u want to work for a while till u get married then it is fine and i don't see anything wrong in it..but when u get married,give up ur job because ur family needs u more than the sick people need u.

There are many doctors who can cure the sick people...But it is ONLY YOU who can take care of ur family and not someone else.

 

[Loyal Servant]

Assalamualikum.This is my opinion and I do not want anyone to comment on my post.I am really tired of this whole situation of objecting.

Some of my friends are doctors and eventually they gave up their job once they got married. Their husband do not have problem with it but the reason they gave up is that their knowledge in Islam increased and they realised that no matter how smart a woman is,her job is in the house and not outside the house.You can study whatever you want because it is obligatory to seek knowledge.

But in the end you have to give up your job to raise you children and take care of your husband.

On the day of judgement,Allah is not gonna question the women how many patients did she cure or saved. He will question your duty as a wife and as a mother.Did u feed ur husband well?did u feed ur kids well?did u clean ur house well?

The key to enter jannah through her husband.

A woman who let her kids being raised by baby sitter or let the maid to do the cleaning and cooking,do u think she can enter jannah?

Then what is the purpose of being married in the first place?

Each of us have responsibility.so we should do our responsibility first.

our job is to raise the family,and men's job is to work and bring money.

Am not saying that all female doctors are bad but am alarming u that it is time for changes.

get prepared to be questioned on the day of Judgement.

If u want to work for a while till u get married then it is fine and i don't see anything wrong in it..but when u get married,give up ur job because ur family needs u more than the sick people need u.

There are many doctors who can cure the sick people...But it is ONLY YOU who can take care of ur family and not someone else.

Assalamualaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakutuhu.
JazakAllah Khayran for your reply dear. I agree with most of what uve said.
I personally belive that education is a life long investment. So I want to make the best use of whatever I have studied, am studying and InshAllah will study.
As I said, I agree with what u have to say. But this is just the positive side of life. All these situations will be taken into account only when I become a doctor and If get married, if I have children !
I know that we all expect a good life in our future, happily married with kids and soo on. We shouldnt forget that we are not going to get everything we long for. There is a possibility that I may never get married, or may never have children, or my husband dies or that we are divorced. As only ALLAH (SWT) knows whats in store for us, I believe we need to be prepared for every hurdle which might be awaiting us.
Even if I dont become a doctor, I would still like to be very educated and make myself financially strong. And inshAllah if I have a good husband and family in my future, I would like to use that money for other purposes.And If Allah wills, I would like to work at home.

I hope I havent offended you dear sister. But this is what I personally think.

 

[palestine]

I agree with you. I want to become a nurse, like drawing blood and basics stuff. not that i enjoy medicine much but just so that if i return to muslim lands i would be able to nurse the poor and those who are unable to take care of themselves or in cases of jihad. my main profession that i'd like to take upon is International relations and sociology. and journalism (minor), so that i can speak out for the muslims and so that i can study the islamic nations and help them in reviving this ummah by making them understand where they're going wrong. besides sociology was first discovered by a muslim man. so i love it.
wasalamu alaikum.

 

[revert2007]

Not even a complimentary comment? You got it right, sister. You understand your priorities as a Muslim woman. May God bless you and your family.

Compliment is like chopping my head.
Just make dua for me and that is more than enough

 

[mahussain3]

There is a possibility that I may never get married, or may never have children, or my husband dies or that we are divorced. As only ALLAH (SWT) knows whats in store for us

.

Dear Sisi there in no doubt in that that we never knows what over future holds and we should always be ready and prepare for everything and should be ready to face any difficult situation,but the possibilities you have included here is something which being a girl you should not think about(note:This doesn't mean in any way that you are a girl so you should be under your husband-Hyderabadi sonch,no its not like that),what I want to say you is just be positive and have a positive attitude for every thing and for every problem encountered in your life.Pls dont think that way.You may think like "I will become a gynaecologist and will serve the women etc".,b'cos there are not so many Female doctors and in most cases our muslim women have to consult to a male doctor many a times for such cases,so just have this kinds of thoughts in your mind pls dont think in a negative way that "IF I HAVE TO SUPPORT MY FAMILY,IF MY HUSBAND DIES etc..."
Hope you'll not get angry on your brother for such a reply ...
Forgive me if I am wrong anywhere and do correct me.

Note: for women service to her Husband and to her children is superior to Jihad.

 

[revert2007]

Assalamualaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakutuhu.
JazakAllah Khayran for your reply dear. I agree with most of what uve said.
I personally belive that education is a life long investment. So I want to make the best use of whatever I have studied, am studying and InshAllah will study.
As I said, I agree with what u have to say. But this is just the positive side of life. All these situations will be taken into account only when I become a doctor and If get married, if I have children !
I know that we all expect a good life in our future, happily married with kids and soo on. We shouldnt forget that we are not going to get everything we long for. There is a possibility that I may never get married, or may never have children, or my husband dies or that we are divorced. As only ALLAH (SWT) knows whats in store for us, I believe we need to be prepared for every hurdle which might be awaiting us.
Even if I dont become a doctor, I would still like to be very educated and make myself financially strong. And inshAllah if I have a good husband and family in my future, I would like to use that money for other purposes.And If Allah wills, I would like to work at home.

I hope I havent offended you dear sister. But this is what I personally think.

You did not offend me my dear.Of course education is very important and never give up ur studies.even if it is not medical studies,study anything that can secure ur life.as u said we never know the future and we never know how long our marriage will last since the divorce rate is very high.if one day anything happen to us and we are left alone,then this scroll that we have will be a great help for us.I am just speaking in general that all women get married and have children.and when that happen to u,consider about what i have said. I myself is a university graduate and i have been wondering what can i do with my education.well to be honest i am using my knowledge in daily life

for the time being do what u think is right and go for it.when u get married inshaAllah u can reconsider everything.there is nothing to loose though

 

[revert2007]

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[mahussain3]

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I completely agree with you dear

 

[ShyHijabi]

Hmmm well obviously I am going to biased on this one as I am completing my medical school soon, insh'Allah. I find it humurous that some here have maids and nannies and are not employed yet feel it would be bad for employed females to use these same options.

Are people not aware that Rasool (peace be upon him) was actually set to the desert to be raised by nannies (wet nurse) while his mother was still alive? There was no shame in having people assist in caring for your young as well as having servants around the house. Kadijah (RA) ran her own business for most of her life and it was her wealth that made the spread of Islam possible in the beginning. (Rasool stated this fact himself) There were women who actually FOUGHT in the jihads as well as treated the fallen in battle.

I will most likely be depending heavily on my mother in law to help with the upbringing of my children as she is very understanding about the demands of medicine. Folks actually think that a person will not gain credit for SAVING lives on judgement day??? Really? I respectfully disagree. I think every aspect of our lives will be examined and weighed, not just one facet.

Being a mother is very important and there is no higher calling. But that is not to say that a woman cannot do anything else. Islam recognizes females for their minds, their skills, and their overall worth. When a woman is sick or injured who is best to treat her? The scholars unanimously agree that the best option is another Muslim female. How can there be female Muslim physicians if they all quite their jobs in medicine when having children/getting married? This is called a logical fallacy, the creation of a rule that will cancel out another rule.

I have been blessed with a very understanding husband who actually prefers me to stay in medicine rather than quite and become a housewife exclusively. Why? Because he knows the ummah is seriously lacking in female professionals and our women are being forced to go to kuffars and worse, male kuffars and expose their awra for treatment. Like I said this is simply another point of view from someone who is juggling school, marriage, and insh'Allah, one day children. There is no absolute on this, it is a matter of each woman's skills and strengths.

 

[mahussain3]

Because he knows the ummah is seriously lacking in female professionals and our women are being forced to go to kuffars and worse, male kuffars and expose their awra for treatment. Like I said this is simply another point of view from someone who is juggling school, marriage, and insh'Allah, one day children. There is no absolute on this, it is a matter of each woman's skills and strengths.

This is what I was trying to explain it to sis royal servant

 

[revert2007]

I am not saying that it is forbidden to have maids.I myself have maids .So why would i say such things if i myself have maids?In islam it is permissible to have maid if the wife really can't cope up with all the house work.

But we shouldn't compare what has been done 1430 years with todays world.those day marriage at young age is permissible but these days u need to be at least 17 or 18 to get married.so this the proof that what was done that time is not similar to what is being done today.

women during the prophet's time isnt the same as this time.those days no fitnah but this day there is even on internet when u do not see each other.

if the woman is really sick and she is not capable of doing the house work and she has many kids and need someone to help her then i don't find any wrong reason in this.But with the intention of neglecting the responsibility of the house just for the sake or job,then i don't think it is right.

whether other women see male doctors or female doctors shoulnd't be an issue.

by the way many females prefer male doctors.when i was pregnant and there is only one day for female doctors but none of the female patients want to see the female doctors.they were asking for the male gynie.i myself prefer a male gynie.

in islam it is permissible for male to see ur awra for the treatment reason.

if not where in quran did it say that female cannot be treated by male?there is no such verse.even there is no fatwa about female must go to female doctors even though there are options.

for a woman,house comes first because the ummah of islam is being build by us(women).

just because we are doing something that doens't mean it is ok in Islam or we should say that is the best.for certin situation it can be considered but we cannot come to a conclusion that it is no big deal for women to work.it is a great deal by the way.if all the women can stop working and stay at homen,men will have better opportunity in raising the family.

in Islam,from inner garments to the outer garments,food and every single thing even as small as the niddle should be bought from the husband's money.when the female work,she only keeps the money for herself and it is not ok for her to spend her money to buy food for her husband.

so who better go to work?the man who support the family or the woman who save the money and never know if she will use it or not.

i can talk from different angle as well as a modern woman.but i do not want to do so because I am Muslimah.that is my simple answer.all my answer should be related to islam.i can't give answer acording to what people want to hear or soothing their ear.

when we read islamic books about being good housewife,check out what the scholors have to say about it.check out what the quran said about it.

by the way have we ever thought about the fitnah?which is more important?having female doctors even it is not necessary or avoiding fitnah?

if people think my husband is the reason that am nt working then it is not true.once my son starts to go to school,i have the choice to go to work.but I do not want and I have strictly told him about this.

if i were to work,i will work from home helping my father in law with his university stuffs(he is a professor).

i have the options as well.anyway what is best for me might not be best for others because it depends on their culture and the way of thinking.but i myself can only speak what islam says.i have done studies and all i read and listen said the best place for a woman is home.the rest is up to each individual to make ur choice according to ur situation.

again plz remember that the key for a woman to enter jannah is to jihad in her house and please her husband.not by going out and searching money.

 

[Loyal Servant]

Assalamualaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakutuhu
JazakAllah Khayr for ur replies. There is just one thing I want to make it clear again, which I have previously written in my first post. The main purpose behind myself wanting to work is not Money or Time Pass or any such reason. Apart from being financially stable, there is a lot more I want to do which is not related to any material reasons. InshAllah, if I become a doctor I will try to set up a clinic at home, get some helpers for my professional work and try my level best to fulfill my duties as a wife and a mother.

And brother mahussain, I am not thinking negatively. Its just that im trying to be safe just incase that happens. It can happen to anybody and we need to be prepared.

 

[Loyal Servant]

You did not offend me my dear.Of course education is very important and never give up ur studies.even if it is not medical studies,study anything that can secure ur life.as u said we never know the future and we never know how long our marriage will last since the divorce rate is very high.if one day anything happen to us and we are left alone,then this scroll that we have will be a great help for us.I am just speaking in general that all women get married and have children.and when that happen to u,consider about what i have said. I myself is a university graduate and i have been wondering what can i do with my education.well to be honest i am using my knowledge in daily life

for the time being do what u think is right and go for it.when u get married inshaAllah u can reconsider everything.there is nothing to loose though

JazakAllah Khayr sister.
Yes, as the HOLY QURAN and all the Islamic Books mention, women are the best at home. InshAllah, once I get married i can reconsider everything and device out new methods within the islamic limits, and still be able to do what I want to. InshAllah.

 

[mahussain3]

Assalamualaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakutuhu
JazakAllah Khayr for ur replies. There is just one thing I want to make it clear again, which I have previously written in my first post. The main purpose behind myself wanting to work is not Money or Time Pass or any such reason. Apart from being financially stable, there is a lot more I want to do which is not related to any material reasons. InshAllah, if I become a doctor I will try to set up a clinic at home, get some helpers for my professional work and try my level best to fulfill my duties as a wife and a mother.

And brother mahussain, I am not thinking negatively. Its just that im trying to be safe just incase that happens. It can happen to anybody and we need to be prepared.

Yes Dear sister,
we need to be prepared for anything and everything in our life,and even we are not talking about the money or any materialistic thing.And I know you are not thinking negatively but have a positive idea behind every reason,just similar to what you said that you will establish a clinic in your home but not if my husband dies or sumthing lyk dat,hope you got my point.Anyways All my du'as and support is with you dear sister,hope we haven't misunderstood anyone here in this thread.May Allah ( Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala) makes things easy for you,and May you achieve all what you have planned and what you deserve,Ameen.

 

[hana*]

Salam

How come there are so few Muslims that seem really interested in becoming teachers? If there were more good, Muslim teachers, there would be more opportunities for good Muslim schools; good Muslim schools should results in more good Muslims.

I think so many people concentrate on the "top" careers of engineering and medicine (ie, also very high salary jobs) and forget that there WOULD BE NO engineers or doctors without teachers.

thats so true sis i agree with you, but there are reasons for this. here in UK for example currently it is very difficult to get a post as a school teacher, particularlly primary school- i read an article saying 500 people apply for one post. i know this shouldnt stop anyone (i went through 'i want to be a teacher phase' ) i think we need more muslim teachers, particularlly hijabi Muslim teachers so that they can represent Islam (by their character and conduct) to the new generation of children and young adults.

 

[hana*]

there have been very good comments put forward by shyjihabi, ayman1 and revert07. i think at the end of the day family comes first and foremost and a man will not stop her wife going out to work. however, will she manage a full time position then the cooking and cleaning and taking care of the kids?

when i first qualified as a pharmacist i thought this is great, but now i have come to understand that when i become a wife and mother: my husband and children are priority and theres no point in having children if we are going to leave them in day care: the first 5 years of a child are the most important years of its life and the mother is the first school for its child. this paves the decisions and personality of the child.

in islam, women are lucky- they are not obliged to work or spend any money on the family- thats the mans role. the typical woman living in UK is expected to work full time, contribute to the mortgage, help pay the bills and then go home cook and clean and then raise her children... she is next to self-destruction. societys problems are all as a result of no proper family structure: we have drunk teenagers as young as 13, pregnant girls of the same age, theft, joy-riding etc etc all as a result of no family srtucture if you ask any disturbed teenager they will say that there was nobody home for me when i needed them the most- both parents are out working or too exhausted to listen or, in many cases they are divorced. woman here fought so hard to be mans co-equal and yet there still it discrimination in pay over the sexes.

while the woman in islam has the right to work and in professions such as medicine will gain enormous reward from saving peoples lives- what about our own families? who is there for them? we need to start from home if we are to improve society- it starts from home.

 

[ShyHijabi]

by the way many females prefer male doctors.when i was pregnant and there is only one day for female doctors but none of the female patients want to see the female doctors.they were asking for the male gynie.i myself prefer a male gynie.

Preference has no holding when it comes to being a proper Muslim. The scholars all say that a woman must go through these steps when seeking medical treatment, first a female Muslim, then a female who is not a Muslim, a male who is Muslim, and dead last is a male who is not a Muslim. This isn't about preference but Shariah.

INsh'Allah I will continue to please my husband and also be a doctor, he has encouraged me in this sense. If we need to hire a maid and maybe a Muslimah to help out with some hours of childcare I don't think that is a bad thing.

And I think even though the women lived over 1400 years ago we can still look to their lifestyle and imitate it. I would LOVE to be able to have the strength and wisdom of Kadijah. (RA) She lived during a time of great fitnah and struggle and still managed to run a business and raise her family, mash'Allah. Money is not an issue but trying to help my fellow Muslimahs is very much a goal of mine. Insh'Allah one day I will go to the third world countries and provide medical treatment to my Muslim sisters.

 

[hana*]

Preference has no holding when it comes to being a proper Muslim. The scholars all say that a woman must go through these steps when seeking medical treatment, first a female Muslim, then a female who is not a Muslim, a male who is Muslim, and dead last is a male who is not a Muslim. This isn't about preference but Shariah.

INsh'Allah I will continue to please my husband and also be a doctor, he has encouraged me in this sense. If we need to hire a maid and maybe a Muslimah to help out with some hours of childcare I don't think that is a bad thing.

And I think even though the women lived over 1400 years ago we can still look to their lifestyle and imitate it. I would LOVE to be able to have the strength and wisdom of Kadijah. (RA) She lived during a time of great fitnah and struggle and still managed to run a business and raise her family, mash'Allah. Money is not an issue but trying to help my fellow Muslimahs is very much a goal of mine. Insh'Allah one day I will go to the third world countries and provide medical treatment to my Muslim sisters.

that is a fantastic ambition and alhamdulilah that youre husband is supportive. i wish i could do the same, ive always wished to do something to help Muslims

 

[arzafar]

Hmmm well obviously I am going to biased on this one as I am completing my medical school soon, insh'Allah. I find it humurous that some here have maids and nannies and are not employed yet feel it would be bad for employed females to use these same options.

Are people not aware that Rasool (peace be upon him) was actually set to the desert to be raised by nannies (wet nurse) while his mother was still alive? There was no shame in having people assist in caring for your young as well as having servants around the house. Kadijah (RA) ran her own business for most of her life and it was her wealth that made the spread of Islam possible in the beginning. (Rasool stated this fact himself) There were women who actually FOUGHT in the jihads as well as treated the fallen in battle.

I will most likely be depending heavily on my mother in law to help with the upbringing of my children as she is very understanding about the demands of medicine. Folks actually think that a person will not gain credit for SAVING lives on judgement day??? Really? I respectfully disagree. I think every aspect of our lives will be examined and weighed, not just one facet.

Being a mother is very important and there is no higher calling. But that is not to say that a woman cannot do anything else. Islam recognizes females for their minds, their skills, and their overall worth. When a woman is sick or injured who is best to treat her? The scholars unanimously agree that the best option is another Muslim female. How can there be female Muslim physicians if they all quite their jobs in medicine when having children/getting married? This is called a logical fallacy, the creation of a rule that will cancel out another rule.

I have been blessed with a very understanding husband who actually prefers me to stay in medicine rather than quite and become a housewife exclusively. Why? Because he knows the ummah is seriously lacking in female professionals and our women are being forced to go to kuffars and worse, male kuffars and expose their awra for treatment. Like I said this is simply another point of view from someone who is juggling school, marriage, and insh'Allah, one day children. There is no absolute on this, it is a matter of each woman's skills and strengths.

that's a fair point. Besides it's never too bad to have a doctor at home.
However, i have seen a lot of doctors among my close relatives and boy they have some tough schedules. like leaving the house at 2 a.m.
In the end it all depends upon how you manage it. It's difficult but certainly possible and as you rightly pointed out, somebody has to do it.

 

[fada_all]

salam alikum

im out of work now after marriage ..but i voted for other because i usee to work as an assitant of direction