Saifu deen
Alhamdullah..
:salam2:
Terrible Bus Accident
There was a terrible bus accident. Unfortunately, no one survived the accident except a monkey which was on board and there were no witnesses. The police try to investigate further but they get no results. At last, they try to interrogate the monkey. The monkey seems to respond to their questions with gestures. Seeing that, they start asking the questions. The police chief asks, "What were the people doing on the bus?" The monkey shakes his head in a condemning manner and starts dancing around; meaning the people were dancing and having fun. The chief asks, "Yeah, but what else were they doing?". The monkey uses his hand and takes it to his mouth as if holding a bottle. The chief says, "Oh! They were drinking, huh??!" The chief continues, "Okay, were they doing anything else?" The monkey nods his head and moves his mouth back and forth, meaning they were talking. The chief loses his patience, "If they were having such a great time, who was driving the stupid bus then?" The monkey cheerfully swings his arms to the sides as if grabbing a wheel.
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College Grad's Starting Salary
Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Person asked a young engineer who was fresh out of MIT, "What starting salary were you thinking about?" The Engineer said, "In the neighborhood of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." The interviewer said, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5 weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years - say, a red Corvette?" The Engineer sat up straight and said, "Wow! Are you kidding?" The interviewer replied, "Yeah, but you started it."
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Offer Legal Advice
Taylor was desperate for business, and was happy to be appointed by the court to defend an indigent defendant.
The judge ordered Taylor, "You are to confer with the defendant in the hallway, and give him the best legal advice you can."
After a time, Taylor re-entered the courtroom alone.
When the judge asked where the defendant had gone, Taylor replied, "You asked me to give him good advice. I found out that he was guilty, so I told him to split."
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A Love for Material Goods
A lawyer was driving his big BMW down the highway, singing to himself, "I love my BMW, I love my BMW." Focusing on his car, not his driving, he smashed into a tree. He miraculously survived, but his car was totaled. "My BMW! My BMW!" he sobbed.
A good Samaritan drove by and cried out, "Sir, sir, you're bleeding! And my god, your left arm is gone!"
The lawyer, horrified, screamed "My Rolex! My Rolex!"
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Terrible Bus Accident
There was a terrible bus accident. Unfortunately, no one survived the accident except a monkey which was on board and there were no witnesses. The police try to investigate further but they get no results. At last, they try to interrogate the monkey. The monkey seems to respond to their questions with gestures. Seeing that, they start asking the questions. The police chief asks, "What were the people doing on the bus?" The monkey shakes his head in a condemning manner and starts dancing around; meaning the people were dancing and having fun. The chief asks, "Yeah, but what else were they doing?". The monkey uses his hand and takes it to his mouth as if holding a bottle. The chief says, "Oh! They were drinking, huh??!" The chief continues, "Okay, were they doing anything else?" The monkey nods his head and moves his mouth back and forth, meaning they were talking. The chief loses his patience, "If they were having such a great time, who was driving the stupid bus then?" The monkey cheerfully swings his arms to the sides as if grabbing a wheel.
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College Grad's Starting Salary
Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Person asked a young engineer who was fresh out of MIT, "What starting salary were you thinking about?" The Engineer said, "In the neighborhood of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." The interviewer said, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5 weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years - say, a red Corvette?" The Engineer sat up straight and said, "Wow! Are you kidding?" The interviewer replied, "Yeah, but you started it."
----------------------------------------------------------------
Offer Legal Advice
Taylor was desperate for business, and was happy to be appointed by the court to defend an indigent defendant.
The judge ordered Taylor, "You are to confer with the defendant in the hallway, and give him the best legal advice you can."
After a time, Taylor re-entered the courtroom alone.
When the judge asked where the defendant had gone, Taylor replied, "You asked me to give him good advice. I found out that he was guilty, so I told him to split."
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A Love for Material Goods
A lawyer was driving his big BMW down the highway, singing to himself, "I love my BMW, I love my BMW." Focusing on his car, not his driving, he smashed into a tree. He miraculously survived, but his car was totaled. "My BMW! My BMW!" he sobbed.
A good Samaritan drove by and cried out, "Sir, sir, you're bleeding! And my god, your left arm is gone!"
The lawyer, horrified, screamed "My Rolex! My Rolex!"
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( Keep on smiling!!!).....
HAHAHAHAH....
