q8penpals
Junior Member
Salam
Ok, I need some CONCRETE serious advice for the holiday season.
My entire family and friend circle back home is Christian (although not all staunch practicers). I will receive Christmas cards and gifts no matter what (my family suspects I am Muslim, but they do not bring it up, so I do not either, just to keep peace). My husband gets them too, and they KNOW he is Muslim.
How do you deal without alienating your family or causing them to hate Islam? I see people posting here that they will not say "Merry Christmas" or even "Happy Holidays" because "it is like saying 'Happy Going to Hell'" or some such nonsense. It is a lot easier to say that when it is just your co-workers or fellow students, but when you ENTIRE family doesn't understand ("because we don't go to church on christmas anyway") ?
Personally, I do not go out of my way, other than sending gifts (I like to give gifts in general) and sending general Seasons Greetings cards to close family, like my 86 year old grandmother who would probably die on the spot if I told her I am Muslim.
And the thing is, I miss the "Christmas" that my family celebrates - not the religious Christmas. I miss decorating the house in pretty lights, making all sorts of cookies and sweets with my mother, wrapping gifts in pretty bows and ribbons, and the music of the season, especially the cutsie, traditional songs of Bing Crosby and the like.
Oh sure, some people will comment, well, do all the same things but do them for Eid - yeah, and with who? All by myself? I have no one other than my husband, and he doesn't like to bake, doesn't care about decorating the house (although he tells me I am free to decorate however and whenever I want), and I have no one to give Eid gifts to, other than my husband. And of course, their are no "Happy Eid" songs to play while deocrating.
It is not like I am doubting my religious beliefs, I guess I just have the blues right now. My home in the states (and even my apartment in Kuwait before becoming muslim) was always decorated for every single holiday (even green for St. Patrick's Day, and I am not Irish!) just because it made my house feel home-y. I loved having friends and family over, but even now, the friends I have in Kuwait are nearly all Christian (some way more Christian than I ever was) so they all go to Christmas parties.
My hsuband's family is so disjointed and dysfunctional (they put the "fun" in dysFUNctional! LOL!) and I don't speak Arabic, and most of them don't speak English, so there is nothing going on there. I am liked by all his family and get along fine with them, but no one ever just calls and asks me to come over or go shopping or anything like that - like what real friends or family would do.
oK, i am almost crying now sitting here, so I will stop.
Lsna
Ok, I need some CONCRETE serious advice for the holiday season.
My entire family and friend circle back home is Christian (although not all staunch practicers). I will receive Christmas cards and gifts no matter what (my family suspects I am Muslim, but they do not bring it up, so I do not either, just to keep peace). My husband gets them too, and they KNOW he is Muslim.
How do you deal without alienating your family or causing them to hate Islam? I see people posting here that they will not say "Merry Christmas" or even "Happy Holidays" because "it is like saying 'Happy Going to Hell'" or some such nonsense. It is a lot easier to say that when it is just your co-workers or fellow students, but when you ENTIRE family doesn't understand ("because we don't go to church on christmas anyway") ?
Personally, I do not go out of my way, other than sending gifts (I like to give gifts in general) and sending general Seasons Greetings cards to close family, like my 86 year old grandmother who would probably die on the spot if I told her I am Muslim.
And the thing is, I miss the "Christmas" that my family celebrates - not the religious Christmas. I miss decorating the house in pretty lights, making all sorts of cookies and sweets with my mother, wrapping gifts in pretty bows and ribbons, and the music of the season, especially the cutsie, traditional songs of Bing Crosby and the like.
Oh sure, some people will comment, well, do all the same things but do them for Eid - yeah, and with who? All by myself? I have no one other than my husband, and he doesn't like to bake, doesn't care about decorating the house (although he tells me I am free to decorate however and whenever I want), and I have no one to give Eid gifts to, other than my husband. And of course, their are no "Happy Eid" songs to play while deocrating.
It is not like I am doubting my religious beliefs, I guess I just have the blues right now. My home in the states (and even my apartment in Kuwait before becoming muslim) was always decorated for every single holiday (even green for St. Patrick's Day, and I am not Irish!) just because it made my house feel home-y. I loved having friends and family over, but even now, the friends I have in Kuwait are nearly all Christian (some way more Christian than I ever was) so they all go to Christmas parties.
My hsuband's family is so disjointed and dysfunctional (they put the "fun" in dysFUNctional! LOL!) and I don't speak Arabic, and most of them don't speak English, so there is nothing going on there. I am liked by all his family and get along fine with them, but no one ever just calls and asks me to come over or go shopping or anything like that - like what real friends or family would do.
oK, i am almost crying now sitting here, so I will stop.
Lsna