friendless......

Seeking Allah's Mercy

Qul HuwaAllahu Ahud!
:salam2:
i hope all my brothers and sisters are happy and in good health.And under Allah 's love and mercy.

well guys my problem is that i hav trouble making friends.the girls here have only three kinds of interests;
1.movies jewelry and clothes(all inspired by indian movies)

i just can't bear to stand near them.

2.boys.........this is cute and that one is cool.urgh.they act as if boys are some other specie....

they completely digust me.

3.girls who think they are center of the world....rude sort.

i kick them away.


now if i get on talking terms v can't get along.they talk like crazy.i always hav the urge to point them out,at times i do and then well,they gat irritated.
need ur hlp nd advice fast.

so i felt pretty lonely when i not near TTi.i ve made friends here.but i have a problem here too.some of them are guys.and it feels good to talk to them they nice and respect ful,unlike the rest of their specie.but is it alright to talk to them.considering the PM stuff is over looked by admin.
 

saima abdullah

my life iz 4 Allah
Asalam o alykum wr wb
alhumdulillah sister m very good in making friends it takes me mins to make friends even at doctors clinic i make friends...
and the open secret behind this i love humans really i do, i will advice you never see others as bad guys you never know what Khair (good) Allah has bestowed him/her. (gender segregation should be kept in mind even if you are interacting with boys even of purpose of deen).
don't hate people hate sins
keep you heart sincere for you humans (except enemies of Allah S.W.T always keep grudge for them)
avoid to think negative about people. no one is perfect not even you.
love is like water it pave its way.. so my sister try to make friends in humble way ........
there a hadith i don't remember exact words, a believer loves and gets love i cant recall the rest of hadith i wll try to search it for you inshaAllah
i want to be your friend :hearts::hearts::hearts:
love you for sake of Allah azza wa jal
 

slaveofAllah88

Slave of Allah (swt)
aslam o aliakum sister, i understand ur concerns and sister Saima said it really beautifully

but view others as u want them to view u, if u start picking out mistakes they will pick out mistakes too, no one is perfect in life but u goto ignore something and show them somethings.

Im not sure this works in the west, like i broke ties with all my friends girls or boys after becoming more religious due the problem of them commiting haram infront of me, if u feel like u r tempted to become a part of haram then dont be in their company but if its just small social issues u can always re-direct their attention
 

ahmed_indian

to Allah we belong
its better to be alone than to have bad friends. bcoz ppl's influence can really change one's character.

but make Dua's and try to find some good ones. inshallah there must be some good muslimahs in ur place who keep Allah and His pleasure the main aim in thier lives eg. in masjid, etc.

may Allah help u in ur search.
 

a_stranger

Junior Member
:salam2:

I think when we muslems have a better relation with our creator (Allah) swt then it will be easier to have good relation with his creatures since Allah swt teaches us to feel humble , to forgive , to wash our hearts from envy and arrogance , to love for others what we love for ourselves, to say a good word always ,to smile and help ..........this can make our relations with others better .......but keeping in mind no mixing between genders only in halal. LOve of Allah swt and Taqwa can change our whole attitude. But change will not be like magic it need a time :salah:
 

allah is with me

Rabana Wa laqal Hamd
umm..i know it is very tough...
see sister if you make friends with those kind of people, then they will try to make you like them..
and after all we are human , we might get tempted..
so, its better you be far from them...
or else try to make them like you (islamic)...
and if they dont wanna..
then pray for them to allah' to give them hidayah'. and also pray that you get an islamic friend....
i hope i helped
 

saima abdullah

my life iz 4 Allah
its better to be alone than to have bad friends. bcoz ppl's influence can really change one's character.

but make Dua's and try to find some good ones. inshallah there must be some good muslimahs in ur place who keep Allah and His pleasure the main aim in thier lives eg. in masjid, etc.

may Allah help u in ur search.
:salam2:
i will disagree with you a bit, sorry in advance
i believe you must not isolate yourself in religious people
claiming ourselves daaee (caller towards deen) we have to mix up with common masses as Allah has bestowed us with little more know-how of deen e Islam then others, so its our foremost duty to convey this by all of our means, the point you raised is about influence or peer pressure, its very simple we should be strong enough from inside so we can go inside different social circles to convey the message of deen coz we are answerable for this, being a student its golden opportunity to change people around you... so don't miss this, i will tell you the tip to avoid the social mass
i was listening to Dr. Asrar Ahmad, Subhan Allah he gave a very beautiful example of dawat e deen (call toward deen) as water cycle ,
now you know how it works
when a person went for dawah in common people its like water flowing in the rivers and lakes it give benefit to others and also carry dirt and waste from different kind of land, its depends on lands what gets, the grassy lands gets full benefit and get more fertile and helps water in filtration process where as the deserts and barrens make the water dirty but the water follow there as well
so the caller of deen convey the message to all As our Beloved Prophet S.A.W did, He rehmatulil alimeen presented deen before his worse enemies as well, and in the next phase of this cycle the water fell into sea and the sunshine make it hot to evaporate, and the dirt is distal with this heat,
and when a momin come back to Allah through Quran and additional night prayers (i don't do this my self) it evaporate all what he or she has faced all day long and also some good company like this forum make tazkiya (purification of soul) easy for you...now the cloud is ready to rain again mataran tayiyaba (pure water's rain)
so my dear sisters and brother why we always look for support why don't we make our self strong enough to give support to others believe me if you will help Allah in his case He will never lead you to astray and He will inshaAllah fix your feet on His way .:astag::astag::astag:
i have hard of a pious OLD man (be aware old man) who use to go in red light ares for dawah , and he gathered so khair even from there..many prostitutes repent because of him, and in collages there are innocent girls and boys are under cultural influence with out knowing results , tell others what you know about deen even a ayyah .wamma ayleena illal balagh (and only duty on us to convey)
:wasalam:
 

ahmed_indian

to Allah we belong
:salam2:
i will disagree with you a bit, sorry in advance
i believe you must not isolate yourself in religious people
claiming ourselves daaee (caller towards deen) we have to mix up with common masses as Allah has bestowed us with little more know-how of deen e Islam then others, so its our foremost duty to convey this by all of our means, the point you raised is about influence or peer pressure, its very simple we should be strong enough from inside so we can go inside different social circles to convey the message of deen coz we are answerable for this, being a student its golden opportunity to change people around you... so don't miss this, i will tell you the tip to avoid the social mass

but actually sister, everybody is not strong in faith. and i've seen daees meet all kinds of muslims for dawah but still they stick to their pious friends. they dont mix up with non-practicing muslims.

i have experienced decrease in iman when mixing with my less-islamic friends. so the first thing for me is to safeguard my own iman. many muslims went to US, UK that they'll give dawah but unfortunately fell into their life of glitter.
 

saima abdullah

my life iz 4 Allah
but actually sister, everybody is not strong in faith. and i've seen daees meet all kinds of muslims for dawah but still they stick to their pious friends. they dont mix up with non-practicing muslims.

i have experienced decrease in iman when mixing with my less-islamic friends. so the first thing for me is to safeguard my own iman. many muslims went to US, UK that they'll give dawah but unfortunately fell into their life of glitter.
we have to trust in Allah otherwise everyone will take care of his /her own emaan then who will do the dawah and in any case she have to go in collage and Allah can also give her helper from there inshaAllah just dare your self to put a step ahead
:wasalam:
 

Seeking Allah's Mercy

Qul HuwaAllahu Ahud!
Asalam o alykum wr wb
alhumdulillah sister m very good in making friends it takes me mins to make friends even at doctors clinic i make friends...
and the open secret behind this i love humans really i do, i will advice you never see others as bad guys you never know what Khair (good) Allah has bestowed him/her. (gender segregation should be kept in mind even if you are interacting with boys even of purpose of deen).
don't hate people hate sins
keep you heart sincere for you humans (except enemies of Allah S.W.T always keep grudge for them)
avoid to think negative about people. no one is perfect not even you.
love is like water it pave its way.. so my sister try to make friends in humble way ........
there a hadith i don't remember exact words, a believer loves and gets love i cant recall the rest of hadith i wll try to search it for you inshaAllah
i want to be your friend :hearts::hearts::hearts:
love you for sake of Allah azza wa jal

:jazaak: for ur reply sis
sis, its not that i don't luv them.or that i view ppl negatively. i was trying to explain the hurdles.or our difference.its just that soon they start viewing me pretty badly.naturally at times i get hurt.:shymuslima1:

so to avoid this i stay away 4rm girls who shw any of the above mentioned symptoms.unless they approach me for help.hwever i still will try to act more on ur advice.

P.S.by the way the problemo is solved i 'll tell u how, soon..........:SMILY139:
 

Seeking Allah's Mercy

Qul HuwaAllahu Ahud!
aslam o aliakum sister, i understand ur concerns and sister Saima said it really beautifully

but view others as u want them to view u, if u start picking out mistakes they will pick out mistakes too, no one is perfect in life but u goto ignore something and show them somethings.

Im not sure this works in the west, like i broke ties with all my friends girls or boys after becoming more religious due the problem of them commiting haram infront of me, if u feel like u r tempted to become a part of haram then dont be in their company but if its just small social issues u can always re-direct their attention

i like ppl to tell me when i'm wrong bro.................how else will i kno my mistakes.but yeah well every body is not me.i'll try harder to improve the situation.
 

Seeking Allah's Mercy

Qul HuwaAllahu Ahud!
:salam2:
i will disagree with you a bit, sorry in advance
i believe you must not isolate yourself in religious people
claiming ourselves daaee (caller towards deen) we have to mix up with common masses as Allah has bestowed us with little more know-how of deen e Islam then others, so its our foremost duty to convey this by all of our means, the point you raised is about influence or peer pressure, its very simple we should be strong enough from inside so we can go inside different social circles to convey the message of deen coz we are answerable for this, being a student its golden opportunity to change people around you... so don't miss this, i will tell you the tip to avoid the social mass
i was listening to Dr. Asrar Ahmad, Subhan Allah he gave a very beautiful example of dawat e deen (call toward deen) as water cycle ,
now you know how it works
when a person went for dawah in common people its like water flowing in the rivers and lakes it give benefit to others and also carry dirt and waste from different kind of land, its depends on lands what gets, the grassy lands gets full benefit and get more fertile and helps water in filtration process where as the deserts and barrens make the water dirty but the water follow there as well
so the caller of deen convey the message to all As our Beloved Prophet S.A.W did, He rehmatulil alimeen presented deen before his worse enemies as well, and in the next phase of this cycle the water fell into sea and the sunshine make it hot to evaporate, and the dirt is distal with this heat,
and when a momin come back to Allah through Quran and additional night prayers (i don't do this my self) it evaporate all what he or she has faced all day long and also some good company like this forum make tazkiya (purification of soul) easy for you...now the cloud is ready to rain again mataran tayiyaba (pure water's rain)
so my dear sisters and brother why we always look for support why don't we make our self strong enough to give support to others believe me if you will help Allah in his case He will never lead you to astray and He will inshaAllah fix your feet on His way .:astag::astag::astag:
i have hard of a pious OLD man (be aware old man) who use to go in red light ares for dawah , and he gathered so khair even from there..many prostitutes repent because of him, and in collages there are innocent girls and boys are under cultural influence with out knowing results , tell others what you know about deen even a ayyah .wamma ayleena illal balagh (and only duty on us to convey)
:wasalam:
the example is beautiful.:ma:
 

BinKhadija

An Akhu
It's the same everywhere, sister. Not many practising Muslim friends. Don't worry about this small test of patience; keep remembering Allah Azwa'jl when you are alone.

If we try really hard we can make good Muslims our friends. I have been there!
Wa'alykum salaam.
 

Seeking Allah's Mercy

Qul HuwaAllahu Ahud!
umm..i know it is very tough...
see sister if you make friends with those kind of people, then they will try to make you like them..
and after all we are human , we might get tempted..
so, its better you be far from them...
or else try to make them like you (islamic)...
and if they dont wanna..
then pray for them to allah' to give them hidayah'. and also pray that you get an islamic friend....
i hope i helped
actually i did had an islamic sort of friend:hijabi:..............well things hav changed she's still my friend.its complicated i'll explain soon.i didn't mention her in my post for certain reasons,but actually she ws the basic reason of my post.
 

Seeking Allah's Mercy

Qul HuwaAllahu Ahud!
its better to be alone than to have bad friends. bcoz ppl's influence can really change one's character.

but make Dua's and try to find some good ones. inshallah there must be some good muslimahs in ur place who keep Allah and His pleasure the main aim in thier lives eg. in masjid, etc.

may Allah help u in ur search.

exactly brother that why i keep my distance.................for the fear of being changed myself.but i think i need to trust my self now:shymuslima1:
 

Seeking Allah's Mercy

Qul HuwaAllahu Ahud!
:salam2:

I think when we muslems have a better relation with our creator (Allah) swt then it will be easier to have good relation with his creatures since Allah swt teaches us to feel humble , to forgive , to wash our hearts from envy and arrogance , to love for others what we love for ourselves, to say a good word always ,to smile and help ..........this can make our relations with others better .......but keeping in mind no mixing between genders only in halal. LOve of Allah swt and Taqwa can change our whole attitude. But change will not be like magic it need a time :salah:
:jazaak:nice advice brother.i'll try my best to make it a way of my life:inshallah:
 

Seeking Allah's Mercy

Qul HuwaAllahu Ahud!
It's the same everywhere, sister. Not many practising Muslim friends. Don't worry about this small test of patience; keep remembering Allah Azwa'jl when you are alone.

If we try really hard we can make good Muslims our friends. I have been there!
Wa'alykum salaam.
:jazaak:its really kind of u bro .................tells me i'm not the only one with a problem like this.
 

FreedomFighter

Junior Member
:wasalam:

i have a friend too who was like that. when she first came, like the things that you mentioned. just stayed away from her, but eventually we are sort of friends. but before that things happened and we got into an argument, well the argument was sort of started by me, but if i didnt start it, she would always think she was right and that girl would have still got kind of bullied. but it didnt go tooo far, no fighting :D she was shocked i didnt support her. but anyway you sis just stay away from these kind of people, especially if they are many they will mock you and stuff. just ignore them and find some good friends. oh ya and you said the problem is solved, so inshaAllah do tell us.
 

Seeking Allah's Mercy

Qul HuwaAllahu Ahud!
:wasalam:

i have a friend too who was like that. when she first came, like the things that you mentioned. just stayed away from her, but eventually we are sort of friends. but before that things happened and we got into an argument, well the argument was sort of started by me, but if i didnt start it, she would always think she was right and that girl would have still got kind of bullied. but it didnt go tooo far, no fighting :D she was shocked i didnt support her. but anyway you sis just stay away from these kind of people, especially if they are many they will mock you and stuff. just ignore them and find some good friends. oh ya and you said the problem is solved, so inshaAllah do tell us.

:jazaak: sis, for ur kind post.i'll tell my story rite away.:biggrin:by the way ur friend is something like mine.only that we have reached an understanding where we are able to respect each others point of view.:hijabi:
 
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