Help! 15 and homeless by Sunday!

[zinirah]

My guardian that i am staying with wants to force me to do things that is haram~ and the other day she said to me under my house i will force you to go to church. I told her no! . I wil not attend church i am not Christian so why should i have any buisness here. She said fine then you can move back to your mother...but i can't she is abusive! I can't be muslim in her home. She is Christian too!!What can i do..I need to find a family that my guardian can give custudy too...i spell alot wrong becuse i am in hurry!! I am girl. 15, this is too young but they put me in a situation.. I already talk to school guidance they tell me i have to find a family that guardian can transfer me to! Oh help me!

 

[GAZIJA]

My guardian that i am staying with wants to force me to do things that is haram~ and the other day she said to me under my house i will force you to go to church. I told her no! . I wil not attend church i am not Christian so why should i have any buisness here. She said fine then you can move back to your mother...but i can't she is abusive! I can't be muslim in her home. She is Christian too!!What can i do..I need to find a family that my guardian can give custudy too...i spell alot wrong becuse i am in hurry!! I am girl. 15, this is too young but they put me in a situation.. I already talk to school guidance they tell me i have to find a family that guardian can transfer me to! Oh help me!

Assalamu aleikum sister,

Nobody can't help you unless we know where u are living????

 

[Abu_Luqmann]

Sister, which country do u live in
there will be brothers and sisters here to help if u mention, geographically where u r
is there a mosque nearby


salam

 

[saloo]

Asalamu alikum sister i wish inshaallah will help u ? adn about u going to church , its not haram to go there but its haram to worship there . so the advice i can give u is that u go there but not with the intention too worship , let me say u about a man in the time of Prophet ( PBUH ) the man was a servent of a non muslim he was tortured so much to say that he belived in the idol, he was so in pain that he said it , but Prophet ( pbuh ) said was ur intention in saying that the man replied no . so the prophet (Pbuh ) it will not harm ur faith . the mans belive lies in his intention .
i hope it helped you inshaAllah
jazakallah ul khair

 

[OsMaN_93]

Asalamu alikum sister i wish inshaallah will help u ? adn about u going to church , its not haram to go there but its haram to worship there . so the advice i can give u is that u go there but not with the intention too worship , let me say u about a man in the time of Prophet ( PBUH ) the man was a servent of a non muslim he was tortured so much to say that he belived in the idol, he was so in pain that he said it , but Prophet ( pbuh ) said was ur intention in saying that the man replied no . so the prophet (Pbuh ) it will not harm ur faith . the mans belive lies in his intention .
i hope it helped you inshaAllah
jazakallah ul khair

+1
:salam2:

May Allah help you! tell us where are you from sister?

 

[ShyHijabi]

I already talk to school guidance they tell me i have to find a family that guardian can transfer me to! Oh help me!

Salaam,

This sounds....well frankly unbelievable. Guidance counselors are considered "mandatory reporters" which mean they are obligated by law to inform authorities when hearing about neglect/abuse. A counselor would not tell a child to find their own guardian without putting their job on the line. At this point you need to contact the social services in your area and let them know you are being threatened with being kicked out.

Your guardian is not breaking any laws by requiring you to go to church. Since you are legally still a child and have limited control over life, then there is no sin in going to church if your guardian forces it. It's not like you are participating in worship...you are just going into a building...by no fault of your own. If I were you, I would find a way to occupy myself while in the church....recite Quran in your head, try to review your school studies, pretty much anything.

Wasalaam

 

[nasiruyola]

Salam

try to explain to your guardian why don't want to go to church.
Also as other bros and sis have highlighted, it is essential to know the country you live in. this could help to determine the legislation that prevails in your country and whether or not you could have a legal backing.
Be patient with your guardian and explain to her in the most cordial manner. I PRAY THAT she understands and allow you to follow your choice.
ALSO Read sister sarah's (ShyHijabi) advice above. think could be of help to you.
MAY ALLAH HELP YOU OUT OF ANY DIFFICULTY. AMEEN

 

[island muslim]

Salaam Alaiykum,

The sister lives in the USA -

:salam2:
I am sister from Usa. I reverted to Islam on February 4th. My mother was 100% against me becoming a Muslim. One day she yelled at me and told me to either give up this faith or find someone else to live with. I know she loves me and thinks she is doing best for me, besides the fact that she doesn't want a Muslim in her house. So now i live with my grandmother to practice my faith freely. She is also Christian...I figured she would accept me a little more since i haven't seen her in awhile...but now she is the same as my mother. This house hold is horrible. She treats me like crap, and she is always trying to argue about how i am wrong in my choice...she does so much haram...she doesn't let me use a phone to contact anyone or use a computer (I am secretly using from library) her and my mother keep in contact and talk about me and how i am, and if i am having second thoughts on Islam. I know this is the truth and they cant change me, and I treat them with respect even if they don't treat me that way, and i don't follow the haram that they do...so anyways..i go to a school here were i am living..one day i met this teacher she is also Muslim..and she asked me about my family and how i came to Islam and my living..I told her everything..So she takes me to her home a couple of times (secretly) and she introduced me to her family. This lady agrees that i have horrible living place..so she told her sister everything.. Her sister wants to take me into her family. They are such a wonderful family too and I think it would be best for me to live in a Muslim family..but i don't know how this process could be, and i know for sure that my mother is going to hate this idea...but how do i get it to happen????I know it's Allah's will..but how should i bring it up to my mother and grandmother? There Christian and this woman is Muslim of course there not going to like the idea having their daughter with someone they don't know.and is muslim...but how do i get them to agree to it?????? HELP! REALLY I CAN'T TAKE BEING DEPRESSED all the time and my real family treating me like crap!!!

Check all her posts... she has talked about her situation before.

 

[island muslim]

My guardian that i am staying with wants to force me to do things that is haram~ and the other day she said to me under my house i will force you to go to church. I told her no! . I wil not attend church i am not Christian so why should i have any buisness here. She said fine then you can move back to your mother...but i can't she is abusive! I can't be muslim in her home. She is Christian too!!What can i do..I need to find a family that my guardian can give custudy too...i spell alot wrong becuse i am in hurry!! I am girl. 15, this is too young but they put me in a situation.. I already talk to school guidance they tell me i have to find a family that guardian can transfer me to! Oh help me!

Sister, everyones waiting here anxiously for you to paste more info; so inshaallah some brother/sister from here will be able to help. In the meantime you will be in our du'as and thoughts.

 

[ShyHijabi]

Salaam,

According to this previous post http://www.turntoislam.com/forum/showthread.php?t=47457 she lives in the US. So no matter what she will not be homeless, the state is legally responsible for providing fostercare if she is kicked out of her house.

If her mother is abusive then they will have her brought up on charges. But forcing your child to attend church is not abuse in the states. AT this point I think she should worship in secret and simply attend church while focusing on her inner prayers and such. I still question that a school guidance counselor advised her to find her own gaurdian, that is illegal and could have that counselor fired and actually sued for not mandatory reporting.

Wasalaam

 

[xSharingan01x]

:salam2:

I'm not sure if I'm suitable to give advice, however Sister Sarah pointed out that untill you're 18 your guardian are legally binded to provide and care for you, and if they fail to do so the state would take your custody. That's probably the worst case scenario. Insha'Allah your probelm will be solved through other means.

Perhaps others brothers and sisters can give some advice as to what to do?
In the meantime if you want to call an Islamic counselor/advisor please refer to the following information.

Muslim Youth Helpline (USA & Canada)
1800- 550 - MYHL (6945)

More information at their website.
http://muslimmatters.org/2007/12/22/muslim-youth-helplines/

I pray that your situation improves. Also can you please give as an approximate estimate of your location (I'm not talking about city name or anything) so brothers and sisters in your locality can you refer you to appropiate places.
Example: If you live in Southern California I can give you referals to different masajids and organizations here.

 

[zinirah]

sorry i forget to mention

My guardian that i am staying with wants to force me to do things that is haram~ and the other day she said to me under my house i will force you to go to church. I told her no! . I wil not attend church i am not Christian so why should i have any buisness here. She said fine then you can move back to your mother...but i can't she is abusive! I can't be muslim in her home. She is Christian too!!What can i do..I need to find a family that my guardian can give custudy too...i spell alot wrong becuse i am in hurry!! I am girl. 15, this is too young but they put me in a situation.. I already talk to school guidance they tell me i have to find a family that guardian can transfer me to! Oh help me!

I live in United states in New Jersey. I dont know any mosque around were i live.

 

[zinirah]

+1
:salam2:

May Allah help you! tell us where are you from sister?

I live New Jersey near Burlington.

 

[zinirah]

thankyou for this.

 

[Zaynab123]

I live in United states in New Jersey. I dont know any mosque around were i live.

Asalamu alaykum

alot of members in here live in New Jersey, which is a good thing for you because they might help you with alot of info such as a masjid nearby. i hope they decide to help you. i wish i could but too bad, i live in Ohio. smile sis, don't make me feel bad by using this

wasalam

 

[zinirah]

:salam2:

I'm not sure if I'm suitable to give advice, however Sister Sarah pointed out that untill you're 18 your guardian are legally binded to provide and care for you, and if they fail to do so the state would take your custody. That's probably the worst case scenario. Insha'Allah your probelm will be solved through other means.

Perhaps others brothers and sisters can give some advice as to what to do?
In the meantime if you want to call an Islamic counselor/advisor please refer to the following information.

Muslim Youth Helpline (USA & Canada)
1800- 550 - MYHL (6945)

More information at their website.
http://muslimmatters.org/2007/12/22/muslim-youth-helplines/

I pray that your situation improves. Also can you please give as an approximate estimate of your location (I'm not talking about city name or anything) so brothers and sisters in your locality can you refer you to appropiate places.
Example: If you live in Southern California I can give you referals to different masajids and organizations here.

Asalamu alaykum

alot of members in here live in New Jersey, which is a good thing for you because they might help you with alot of info such as a masjid nearby. i hope they decide to help you. i wish i could but too bad, i live in Ohio. smile sis, don't make me feel bad by using this

wasalam

my city is Bordentown. I don't know of any mosque around here. I don't know..

 

[IHearIslam]

I am very sorry to hear about this sister, I wish I could help you but I really can't... I will make dua for you sister. May Allah SWT help you in this difficult time.Ameen

 

[helpinghumanity]

:salam2:

I am sorry to hear about this ukhti....

I am hopeful there were will be many sisters in New Jersy to help you out. Incase you do not find any sister, then inshallah you can contact me and i'll try my best to help you out within my limitation.

 

[Qur'an&Sunnah]

:salam2:

http://www.islamicity.com/orgs/

This is a website where you can locate a masjid near you. Insha'Allah I have helped in some way.

:salam2:

 

[GAZIJA]

Assalamu Aleikum,

Now sister more info; like adress or something, phone number toreach you. Write it to somebody on PM, in order to help you.

As far as I know, in order for her to be supported by the state a complaint has to be issued. She is still a minor and without serious charges, state will not help, because they do not have a case. A state has to have a reason; abuse in the family be it physical or mental, neglected by parents and so on. Without, good reason state will not interfear. Maybe if you press charges against your family(do not do it if you not have to) in order for DCFS to act.

I do not understand school case worker? what is wrong with that person?? If a case worker sees somebody scared it should help that person and assist her in any way.

State need a reason to get involved. That is what I know at leas here in Illinois, it may differ from state to state, Allah knows.

May Allah help you to overcome his test and become proud muslimah inshAllah. May Allah guide us all and gather us in jannah inshAllah.

wasalam