Asja
Pearl of Islaam
**IN MEMORIAM**
**In memoriam to you my mother, father, my sister and brother.*
**In memoriam to your life, becouse you are stil alive.**
**The years have passed and the time is still passing so fast. Moment by moment, still is raining like befor or sky is crying for so many souls crashed in that day. If you would ask passengers they would say :” We do not know “or they do not want to say. I understand them it is better to hide yourselfe in yourselfe, to hide your tears in which you are chokeing yourselfe. To hide yourselfe in your pain that is unknown to others. World is living without stoping, hurrying somewhere but without knowing where. So far away you have hide yourselfe, behind that veil without a color, behind that veil with color of young tears. I am crying, you are crying but we do not see you, we do not see each others. Every where memories on that day. Again everything is starting again. I am running because I do not want to watch but I can not move myselfe and I am standing only on one place. I want to screanm but I have lost my voice. “Help, help” this is what you have said on that day but noone was there.
It is almost like I can hear your breathing. It is almost like I can see you craying, like I can feel all the pain that you have gone trough. It is hurting me so much that I can not explain it with words.
But our words why do we use them, when they can not help us to say all what we think. Why am I writing now if words can not help me, If I can not say everything that I feel. But I still use them, I still write. It is much more easier for my heart. I am doing it for you, becouse I can not forget you. Even that so many years had passed, so many springs, summers, winters. I still feel the same, I still see the same. The same picture in front of my eyes. I am watching, I am watching everything again.
**But I am not afraid, I am not. Do they here that? They do not know how Muslim heart is strong, and how they are weak. Forgive me my mother, forgive me for your tears.
I am so ashamed of myselfe when days pass and I forget on you. I know if that hapends it will be just like you have died again.
**My memory makes you alive and I want you to stay there. You are safe in my heart and they can not hurt you again. They said it is nothing personal. They said we did that only becouse you are Muslims, is that so hard to understand. To understand, to understand what. Now I dont have words, I have lost them. World has lost its words becouse they kept silent. They let you die on souch crul way. How painful this is for me, how painful are these moments.
**Tears in my eyes, they are like the light on your way. But I do not want to cry, they will think that I am weak and I am not. I am not weak dont you see that and they werent either. Do you know why, does your heart knows why? Becouse we are Muslims. Stronger than the stone, breaver than the lion, cleaner than the tear, prouder than the proud, silent like the night. We are there but you dont see us, we are there but you dont hear us, we walk but you dont hear our steps, we get close to you and you still say I dont see you.
**I remember**Sun appeard on the sky and morning has came. It wasnt different than the others, but it was we just didnt see that, or we didnt wanted to see They have gatherd all men and women, young and old. They have gathered all children and that was the last thing that you could see. After that you heard a scream, and than silent again. Night has came. Nothing hapened.
**And the morning again, only this time it was different. Sun appeard but is seamed like the night was still there. Everything was sleaping, nobody was there anymore. Nothing has left acept earth and the sky. Nothing else. One man climbed on the highest hill. He looked in the valley, it was full of beautiful flowers. They were all standing one to another. They were so proud, they were so beautiful. Man kept on watching its beauty and he asked himselfe when did they apear, they were not here the day before.
**The wind was blowing and it seamed that beautiful flowers are walking somwhere. They looked so happy, it was almost like you could here them smileing. Man called other people who lived there to see this miricule but nobody answered on his call. Than he stoped calling, he has lost his voice. Nothing he could say any more. Only one tear has gone down his face, fall on the beautiful flowers and than they disapeared.
**Sun brighted again just like the first day. Man was still standing on the hill, watching in the empty valley. He asked:"Who are they"??? And than one voice answerd to him."They are your brothers and sisters. They are that beautiful flowers that you had seen. They died on Allahs way."
"But do not say for those who died on Allahs way that they are dead. No they are alive, only you do not know that".
**IN MEMORIAM......................*
Written by;Asja
MasaAllah.. I was about to cry really ,I could hardly stop my tears.. May Allah rewards you for each letter that you wrote my dear sister