no friends

[newlight99]

This had me bothering for a while now, I used to hang out with some ppl but I realized they were not for me and I seem can't fit in to a certain kind of group of ppl. When I opened a myspace acct, I realized how much things I am missing out in my life, I don't really go out with other people since like i told you I don't have a group to hang on. I am also really introverted so that might be a liability but it hurts.

 

[Aapa]

Salaam,

Part of growing up is learning to deal with hurt and pain. You have a family here. Part of feeling lonely is being separated from Allah subhana talla. That is natural. We always have a little ping in our hearts. But you have us.

 

[Sonia88]

Salaam,

i agree with mirajmom, its part of growing up.. you will feel like this only for a while, trust me you wont feel like this forever and you'll make other friends, you lose some, you keep some, you make some...

dont get to down by it, and you dont need a group to go out, you can go with 1 or 2 people, duznt have to part of a group or you can go alone, or apart of another group.trust me soon enuf you'll have 1 of your own or apart of another..

personally i wudnt say im part of a group, i have friends, its best if you dont label yourself as a with a group, its not always a good thing, the rep of the group is labelled with you too and most often, its only happens when something bad happens...NO ONE wants a bad reputation its hard to get of....get to know people, do different stuff with different friends.

 

[newlight99]

The only thing I posted this ridiculous thing is because i am already 20 yrs old and i am way beyond the so called "Confusing age". I am still a stay at home type of guy and that really piss me off sometimes.

By the way I converted to Islam a year and a half ago alhamdulilah!

 

[Aapa]

Salaam,

Please do not belittle your post. It seems honest and sincere. I am well beyond my 20's ( sometimes it seems as if they were a dream). You are right on target about questioning life. Just talk to the brothers here. They are a good group and most are in your age range. The journey to Allah subhana talla is a very personal journey..however we meet other pilgrims on the Path. I am very pleased to be on the same path as you. I call my self aapa. I am the oldest female here and this is an Urdu word for older sister.
Your aapa.

 

[alkathiri]

By the way I converted to Islam a year and a half ago alhamdulilah!

Alhamdulilah :jumpclap::jumpclap::jumpclap:

 

[noor4ever]

Asalama alakum
My dear brother in islam its okay to feel this way. I felt this way many times. I have good friends now but it took a lot of pain, stress and lonelieness to finally achieve such good friends. Be patient and soon u will over come this. Read the book of allah, i promise u it is the best medicine. In life u face many obstacles but each one makes u stronger and a better person. Just be patient and allah will make it easy for u. You will find the right people to be with. I've been through this too.

Wasalam

 

[shaheeda35]

:salam2:
Its not easy to make friends these days, very difficult indeed. There is a brothers club here and you never know you might find that friend that you can relate to. I did not have many friends either, and now I have a couple that I can really trust, so dont give up and have faith in Allah.

 

[must91]

your remedy

Brother

I am going to give you a very good remedy for you situation. Please start attending your masjid for the daily 5-time prayers. If you do this sincerly and regularly you will no longer be lonely and you will have many friends and good ones. try to talk to everyone at your masjid even the old folks. and when there is no one to talk to then talk to Allah (SWT) - read Quraan. Your heart will become healthier and happier.

 

[newlight99]

I know its difficult especially with this faith, thats why sometimes I ve been really losing interest in this faith, i dont know cuz i think that I chose this faith out of ignorance when i converted. I use to be a Christian and back then I don't want to be integrated in my society but now I wanted to.

 

[newlight99]

Here just to be clear on things I will tell you guys a little bit about me.

So growing up as a kid back in the Philippines, I only developed friendships with like some few ppl. When i was 13 I moved to the States and my parents (non-muslims until now) told me that we just moved here in States to study and not to be anything else or whatever. So going to highschool, I was kinda conservative also a Christian. I never went to any dates or party with some ppl or you know the usual youth thing that develops your friendship with others.

After highschool, I decided that religion is just really causing me to be socially backward. It is keeping me from integrating and its causing me more isolation. I decided I will be a secular "Christian", I stopped going to church and I just lost interest with anything Christian. Then I saw a video about Sheikh Khalid Yasin about the Purpose of Life, and I converted to Islam after seeing some other videos by scholars such as Yusuf Estes and reading about the flaws of the Christian religion, so basically I converted because Christianity is theologically flawed.

Now in my 20th year I finally opened a Myspace (wow) and I saw my old schoolmates and realized how much I am missing out on such things. It hurts

 

[Faisal_01]

Here just to be clear on things I will tell you guys a little bit about me.

So growing up as a kid back in the Philippines, I only developed friendships with like some few ppl. When i was 13 I moved to the States and my parents (non-muslims until now) told me that we just moved here in States to study and not to be anything else or whatever. So going to highschool, I was kinda conservative also a Christian. I never went to any dates or party with some ppl or you know the usual youth thing that develops your friendship with others.

After highschool, I decided that religion is just really causing me to be socially backward. It is keeping me from integrating and its causing me more isolation. I decided I will be a secular "Christian", I stopped going to church and I just lost interest with anything Christian. Then I saw a video about Sheikh Khalid Yasin about the Purpose of Life, and I converted to Islam after seeing some other videos by scholars such as Yusuf Estes and reading about the flaws of the Christian religion, so basically I converted because Christianity is theologically flawed.

Now in my 20th year I finally opened a Myspace (wow) and I saw my old schoolmates and realized how much I am missing out on such things. It hurts

If I understand your situation correctly, then hate to break it to you. The life you are missing isn't really all that is hyped up to be. Unlike you, I actually started backwards. I wasn't very religious in my HighSchool years (really ever) and I partied a lot. Need less to say, because of it I ran into some major obstacles in my life. I understand that since you "missed out" on all the socializing you want to experience it. Trust me bro. it's not worth it.

I'm 19, and as I get older, I start to realize the reality of things. If there is one thing I learned through out my life is this: No one will live you life for you, it's only you who can do it. No one can force you to do anything. That being said, once I realized that, I had two choices...do I keep doing what I'm doing, or actually grow up? Thats when I took the high road and turned toward Islam.

I'm not saying that I'm the biggest coservative muslim out there nor am I saying I have a lot of knowledge on Islam....that would be a lie if I did. However, I am making the effort to be more religious than I was before. Sure I hang out with my friends still and have large gatherings and such, but I know more about the limits than I did before which ultimately keeps me under control.

Friends will come and go, but Islam will never betray you.

 

[Faisal_01]

I know its difficult especially with this faith, thats why sometimes I ve been really losing interest in this faith, i dont know cuz i think that I chose this faith out of ignorance when i converted. I use to be a Christian and back then I don't want to be integrated in my society but now I wanted to.

Oh and I also wanna add that if you choose Islam out of ignorance and you are not sure about this faith anymore, then you should really sit down one day and really think through things. Back track and focus on why you converted to Islam in the first place. I'd hate to see someone convert to Islam just for the "sake of it" and without any knowledge of the logic behind the faith.

 

[newlight99]

Just that Christianity doesn't make any sense at all bro. Christianity is a big hoax never makes sense, never will.

Also, I also chose islam other than theological reasons, because I am not even planning to integrate with the whole western thing and just did it as a deterrent to what I am regretting now. But I am afraid to miss any prayer.

 

[Faisal_01]

Well it seems like you're on the right track. Just keep your chin up and your priorities straight.

 

[new-muslim]

:salam2:
I kinda know how you feel. Slowly my friends (non muslim) have drifted away slowly but surely. Just not so much in common now. We are at very different stages in life. I also feel that I have next to no friends. I have one or two that are closish.
I think as someone else suggested attend mosque or any other muslim organisations or perhaps a sport. You need to go out of your way to meet people, it won't just happen. I have a friend that got married to my husband's best friend. She moved from another country and she still has no friends really-that's 5 years now(APART FROM ME). It must be quite lonely. I need to make the effort myself to find new friends but gets hard when you have young kids. My advice is find out mslim organisations in your area.

 

[AliIbanez]

Here just to be clear on things I will tell you guys a little bit about me.

So growing up as a kid back in the Philippines, I only developed friendships with like some few ppl. When i was 13 I moved to the States and my parents (non-muslims until now) told me that we just moved here in States to study and not to be anything else or whatever. So going to highschool, I was kinda conservative also a Christian. I never went to any dates or party with some ppl or you know the usual youth thing that develops your friendship with others.

After highschool, I decided that religion is just really causing me to be socially backward. It is keeping me from integrating and its causing me more isolation. I decided I will be a secular "Christian", I stopped going to church and I just lost interest with anything Christian. Then I saw a video about Sheikh Khalid Yasin about the Purpose of Life, and I converted to Islam after seeing some other videos by scholars such as Yusuf Estes and reading about the flaws of the Christian religion, so basically I converted because Christianity is theologically flawed.

Now in my 20th year I finally opened a Myspace (wow) and I saw my old schoolmates and realized how much I am missing out on such things. It hurts

Assalamualaikum

Kumusta :shake: Marami rin pala akong kababayan dito. Same as you, I'm also a revert. May Allah swt guide you.

Assalamualaikum

 

[newlight99]

Kabayan Assalamualaikum w r w barakatuh!

 

[liaa]

Asalama alakum
My dear brother in islam its okay to feel this way. I felt this way many times. I have good friends now but it took a lot of pain, stress and lonelieness to finally achieve such good friends. Be patient and soon u will over come this. Read the book of allah, i promise u it is the best medicine. In life u face many obstacles but each one makes u stronger and a better person. Just be patient and allah will make it easy for u. You will find the right people to be with. I've been through this too.

Wasalam

i'm 16 and sometimes i fell like am losing many things too, i used to be in " a group" but after i saw what they actually do in group(drinking alcohol, smoking...etc..) , i said that i prefer only 1 good friend , it's so true that it takes so much time and stress to discover who your real friends are ... and even though u can never be sure ... but i don't know why i fell that this will go with the age , inshallah!

 

[liaa]

but pls don't blame islam for not having friends , cause if u would like in an islamic country, or at list u would be part of an islamic comunity with ppl of ur age , u wouldn't say the same. but when ur friends are all different religions and they can do things u can't , i think u fell uncomfortable , i'd fell too .. but think that if they would be muslims, everything would be different !and u wouldn't fell like if u are losing smth !