Weak Eeman.

[submitter2Allah]

:salam2:
As a young Muslimah who just finished med sch last year my eeman really goes down sometimes.especially when im hanging out with my girlfriends most of who dont cover up and discuss their exciting social lives how they meet new people and are constantly having fun.
Sometimes i feel like my life is dull and boring and Astaghfirullah i have thought about taking off my abayah and shayla.
I need help.

 

[Salem9022]

Choosing Your Friends




Humans have always been social creatures and in need of friends and companions. A good part of our lives is spent in interaction with others. For Muslims like us who are living in a society where we are clearly a minority, the issue of choosing the right companions is essential for preserving our Deen. Befriending righteous and virtuous Muslims is a necessary means for staying on the Straight Path.

In an authentic Hadith, the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "A person is likely to follow the faith of his friend, so look whom you befriend." [reported by Abu Dawood & Tirmidhee].

Mixing with followers of any way other than that of the Guidance results in a change in one's behaviour, morals and conduct. If we accompany such friends, then we inherit their habits, behaviour and perhaps even their religion. Such a Muslim would find himself in a situation where he is willing to hide his or her Islam in front of those who despise it (those whom he considers as friends) and to separate from the believers. When this situation occurs, a point is reached when there is a very slight difference between the Muslim and his wrong-doing companion. Many times a Muslim is encouraged by his friends to do evil and to forget his duties. The result is that Muslims themselves are often ashamed to leave them to perform prayer, their friends thus causing them to clearly deviate from the Right Path.

Instead of making friends with the misguided ones we should befriend the righteous but still treat everyone else in a gracious and just manner.

In another Hadith, Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "The example of a good companion and a bad companion is like that of the seller of musk, and the one who blows the blacksmith's bellows (respectively). So as for the seller of musk then either he will grant you some, or you buy some from him, or at least you enjoy a pleasant smell from him. As for the one who blows the blacksmith's bellows then either he will burn your clothes or you will get an offensive smell from him." [Bukhari & Muslim]

In his commentary of this Hadith, Imam an-Nawawi said that the Prophet (peace be upon him) compared a good companion to a seller of musk and spoke of the virtue of having companions who are good, who have noble manners, piety, knowledge and good culture. Such are those who grant us from their virtue. And he (peace be upon him) forbade us to sit with those who do evil, commit a lot of sins and other bad deeds, as well as with innovators, backbiters, and so forth. Another scholar said: "Keeping good company with the pious results in attainment of beneficial knowledge, noble manners and righteous actions, whereas keeping company with the wicked prevents all of that."

Allah the Exalted says in the Qur'an: "And (remember) the Day when the wrong-doer will bite his hands and say: Woe to me! Would that I had taken a path with the Messenger. Woe to me! If only I had not taken so- and-so as a friend! He has led me astray from this Reminder (the Qur'an) after it had come to me." [25:27-29].
He also says: "Friends on that Day will be enemies one to another, except al-Muttaqoon (i.e. those who have Taqwah)." [43:67]

In two authentic narrations of the Prophet (peace be upon him) we were commanded to keep company with a believer only, and told that a person will be with those he loves. So if we love and associate ourselves with those who are misguided, we should fear for our fate. The wise person is the one who prepares himself for the Hereafter, not the one who neglects his faith and falls into the trap of Satan who tells him that he will be forgiven and that he can do whatever he wishes. If we truly believe that the best speech is the Speech of Allah and that the best guidance is the guidance of Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him), we should act in accordance with them, lest we build a proof against ourselves.
From another perspective, a “believer is the mirror of his brother,” and if he sees any faults in the other believer, he draws his attention to it in an acceptable manner, helps him to give it up and to wipe away any evil that he may have.

We ask Allah to make us of the righteous ones and give us companions who will take us away from His wrath and lead us to His pleasure and Paradise.

Summary of Islam & The Concept of Friendship by Br. Isa Al-Bosnee at www.islaam.com

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[Salem9022]

Before I started to practise Islam, I used to hang around with bad company, and I mean really really bad company, they used to drink, fornicate-Zinaa, Drugs etc.. And I felt prey to Some of those things. And I felt that it was cool because my "friends" were doing it so I should live an exciting life as well. But subhan'Allah you will never feel satisfied in your heart and you never feel Satisfied if Allah who created you isn't Satisfied with you. If the creator Allah is pleased with you then you will always be happy and content.

And also subhan'Allah when you look at these peoples lives who go out in night clubs and date and drink alchohol, commit Zina(fornication), etc and Have a good time. And Yes So-called Muslims do this as well who have only muslim names and not Muslims at all in Faith. Their lives are just a reck filled with filth and Hardship. They have hard time getting Married, they get divorced even if they find someone to Marry and Most of the Time the Person isn't even a Muslim who they get married to, they have children out of wedlock via Zinaa. They have no support from their families, At the end they get used and abused by their children and people who used to be around them and then they die and no muslim does the proper Islamic burial for these people. This is how these people live. And what a shamefull way to die, and their children at the end, end up in other beleifs and religions.

I don't know about your situation but the people I used to be with, One of them commited Suicide by over-dosing on Alchohol, the other Has his girlfriend Preganent who is also a Muslim wal'Azobillah and works in a Gas Station, the others have just ran away from their parents. This is the life which these people choose because they wanted to have a Good time and have fun.

At the end like I said, You will never be content until the one who created you is Satatisfied with you. And how is he Satisfied with you? By following the Quran and the Sunnaaah and holding on to it by your teeth. And if you don't follow Islam then Allah will make your life so horrible and disgusting and Hard that even in your grave you will be feel remorse.

 

[submitter2Allah]

Jazakallah Khayran for your replies.I guess its because deep down my fear is that I may never get married as a hijabi based on what i see happening in my city.But i will make lots and lots of dua.i love my deen and i understand life without Allah is useless.He will help me overcome this Inshallah.
Make Dua for me too please..

 

[ShyHijabi]

Salaam,

Never get married as a hijabi? Why is that? If anything the hijab should make it clear that you desire to marry a pious husband and not just someone with a Muslim name. I would be grateful that the hijab "advertises" the fact that I will not settle for someone who is Muslim in name only.

Given that you completed med school I am surprised you even have time to socialize as the first year of residency is the most time demanding. If possible I would surround myself with other pious women and not worry about the haram practices of other females. It's like envying a pig for wallowing in dung. The pig may enjoy it but I wouldn't desire to do the same.

Wasalaam

 

[warda A]

salam
We all have our ups and downs same to eeman, it goes up and down but as said above choose friends who will help you because most times we are identified by our choice of friends.

 

[Abu Hannah]

ups and downs

Your temptation comes from none other than our sworn enemy iblees. I too experience these 'whispers', but we must be steadfast. I understand where Salem is coming from because Astaghfirullah I too was in the same boat. Shaitan won't leave us alone till the day we breath our last. We have to continue to pray to Allah to give us strength of Iman. We can't be tempted by what the world around us is doing because we have to have a completely different yardstick to measure what is 'good' in life. If we slip and sin, we must make taubah sincerely and immediately.

 

[a_stranger]

:salam2: sister
Dear sister remember that death may come any moment then how will be the state of those who disobeyed and never cared about their creator , i think you need good company who make you remember Allah swt and Quran .....Try to strengthen you Emman it is the most important treasure you have, don`t loose it. May Allah help us all.

 

[alkathiri]

Jazakallah Khayran for your replies.I guess its because deep down my fear is that I may never get married as a hijabi based on what i see happening in my city.But i will make lots and lots of dua.i love my deen and i understand life without Allah is useless.He will help me overcome this Inshallah.
Make Dua for me too please..

Be strong and visit us here more often as it ,inshAllah, help you increase in eeman. Please choose your friends wisely....

 

[slaveofAllah88]

aslam o alikum sis, i use to get the same feelings but now i changed my friends ... some i do hang out with I try to avoid it when they tell those so called "KOOL" things, i used to be in the same position as Saleem9022 bro, i regret it till now ... its not worth it at all, you might feel like ur boring and this and that ... and then if you do the same thing then you become the same animal rolling in its own filth like sister shyhijabi said, pick good friends and inshallah Allah (swt) will make you feel closer to him