how do i gently break ties with people that are involved in the haram and kufr?

[nyerekareem]

:salam2:

i need some advice on something. how do you tell some of the people that you have grown up with that you can no longer associate with them because of their haram behavior and blatant kufr? these are people that i have known all of my life, and the more serious in my deen that i have become, the more repulsed i am by their haram behavior and obvious kufr. is there an easy way of saying it?

thank you

 

[sclavus]

Praise be to Allah,

Try to decrease the amount of time you spend with them, gradually; and find yourself a better friendship. If you can sit with them from time to time in order to advise them, do it, you'll get your reward for that. But if you feel in danger, just stay away from them.

I lost too many people because of my faith, but I don't mind. A couple of weeks and that's it, they belong to my blurry past. In reality, it's a gain that you're making when you quit that sort of people.

Your faith is the most important gain that you can make in this life, keep it intact and you'll be amongst the winners in this life and in the hereafter,

Aameen.

Take care, akhi.

:salam2:​

 

[alf2]

I had to do this myself and its not an easy thing to do at times. A friend of mine for 14 years, after I converted to Islam was VERY Anti-Islam and was constantly bringing me down and talking badly about our prophet peace be upon him.

I love her like my own sister and I was with her nearly everyday, but i had to break ties with her to show she cannot do that. I decreased my time with her, and one day over MSN messenger (lol) I told her i couldnt take it anymore and I need to associate with like minded positive people.

They're going to be hurt, you cannot avoid that. But they will be okay. All wounds will heal with time insha allah.

 

[Aapa]

Assalaam walaikum,

In the end they do not miss us and we do not miss them. Allah sends us others who are serious about faith.

We have to do this. There is a great pdf in the education section; it is under a thread on where to get a copy of the book. I downloaded and read it. It makes sense. There are three sections to it.

We leave the narrow path to walk on the wide Path. You will feel a sense of relief.

Besides if you get lonely or bored we are always here.

 

[sclavus]

I had to do this myself and its not an easy thing to do at times. A friend of mine for 14 years, after I converted to Islam was VERY Anti-Islam and was constantly bringing me down and talking badly about our prophet peace be upon him.

I love her like my own sister and I was with her nearly everyday, but i had to break ties with her to show she cannot do that. I decreased my time with her, and one day over MSN messenger (lol) I told her i couldnt take it anymore and I need to associate with like minded positive people.

They're going to be hurt, you cannot avoid that. But they will be okay. All wounds will heal with time insha allah.

Praise be to Allah,

Good for you sister, principles need sacrifice. But make sure she understands that you left her just because she doesn't like Islam and just because of that, nothing personal or worldly.

Otherwise, it would be great if you send her a message from time to time, telling her good words and maybe introducing her to Islaamic faith. Or others just like her, for that matter.

The right thing to feel is to pity those poor people for the state of disbelief in which they are drowning and never ever a feeling of pride because we're Muslims and they're not. The reason is that no one chooses their own destiny, Allah alone knows our futures.

People embrace the Islamic faith while others abandon it for something else, every single day.

This feeling of dependence upon our Creator increases our fear of disbelief and also our modesty and motivation in calling others to our faith.

That said, think about protecting your own faith before anything else. You'll never be punished if she doesn't convert to Islaam, you know what I mean. But if she converts, you'll get invaluable reward from Allah subhanah.

The Messenger peace be upon him said: "If Allah guides a person through you, it is better for you than all that is on the earth.” Narrated Al-Bukhari and Muslim.

I congratulate you for being a Muslima and I pray Allah to guide and protect you and all of us.



:salam2:

 

[B.H.]

That's a good idea. The woman who put down Islam may have done it ignorantly but with the best intentions. I would still care for her and drop her a line time from time to let you know you still care.


If Islam taught the things slanderously or ignorantly claimed by non-Muslims said about it I would have nothing to do with it either. Most of the time when people learn what Islam actually teaches they may not convert but will at least feel more at ease.

 

[Aapa]

Assalaam walaikum,

There comes a point where the kufr do not care. We have to be cognizant of that fact. They are the ones who chose not to listen. They are the ones who mock Allah. I am not saying do not be compassionate. I am saying use your sense. Why devote time to those who reject the facts.

Too many Muslims suffer from the disease of wishing to be accepted by kufr. Why? We need to please Allah. Something about the Path.

I recently read we are distracted by alluring elements while on the Path. Let it go and keep walking forward.

Attachments are sticky. They are emotional and we suffer from soft hearts. We have to make firm our hearts. We are the ones responsible for taking care of the Earth.

There is an old saying here: Why cry over spilled milk? It just spoils.

 

[nyerekareem]

thank you everyone. now i feel better about what to do.

 

[sclavus]

Assalaam walaikum,

There comes a point where the kufr do not care. We have to be cognizant of that fact. They are the ones who chose not to listen. They are the ones who mock Allah. I am not saying do not be compassionate. I am saying use your sense. Why devote time to those who reject the facts.

Too many Muslims suffer from the disease of wishing to be accepted by kufr. Why? We need to please Allah. Something about the Path.

I recently read we are distracted by alluring elements while on the Path. Let it go and keep walking forward.

Attachments are sticky. They are emotional and we suffer from soft hearts. We have to make firm our hearts. We are the ones responsible for taking care of the Earth.

There is an old saying here: Why cry over spilled milk? It just spoils.

One hundred per cent true, sister Aapa. But mind that I told the sister to protect her self before anything else, I think that's suite fair.

:salam2: