Asalamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wabarakahu Sister, Insha'Allah you will be guided to the straight path and your inner struggle will be one of ease. As a recent Muslim revert Suban'Allah I know the struggles that comes with this change in life because is not just about belief but is the right way of life that needs to be followed or we get lost very easy and when we revert, depending on our lifestyle, Alhamdulillah, there is usually much inner and outer change that needs to be done, it takes one step at a time. Suban'Allah joining this forum to help in your support Insha'Allah will keep you guided and supported as we are all tested on our faith. I found the difference being a Muslim and a Non Muslim, the rewards as a Muslim are felt and appreciated the most because we are given the right guidance, knowledge and way of life. As Muslims we are also given the most strength in dealing with the ups and downs of life's tests. Suban'Allah we are taught how to heighten our spiritual needs instead of concentrating solely on physical desires and how to understand with knowledge why something is haram or halal. Islam is complete logic and reason and this is why the faith is so strong.
"
Forbidden unto you (for food) are carrion and blood and swineflesh, and that which hath been dedicated unto any other than Allah, and the strangled, and the dead through beating, and the dead through falling from a height, and that which hath been killed by (the goring of) horns, and the devoured of wild beasts, saving that which ye make lawful (by the death-stroke), and that which hath been immolated unto idols. And (forbidden is it) that ye swear by the divining arrows. This is an abomination. This day are those who disbelieve in despair of (ever harming) your religion; so fear them not, fear Me! This day have I perfected your religion for you and completed My favour unto you, and have chosen for you as religion al-Islam. Whoso is forced by hunger, not by will, to sin: (for him) lo! Allah is Forgiving, Merciful." Al-Ma'idah 3
Suban'Allah, when I first heard my call to Islam I spent a year studying and changing and began to read, read and re read the Qur'an daily. The Noble Qur'an is the only book read without end meaning when the last ayat is recited the first ayat is to begin again.
I am not sure of which hadith this is, Insha'Allah if any brothers or sisters know they can let me know, but I found this description of the way of the life of the Prophet
during the beginning of my journey and has helped me and continues to help me, Insha'Allah will also keep you focused on your journey, enjoy your journey, it is the best one you can ever experience and is truly a matter between mind, body and spiritual life and death.
Way of Life as described by the Noble Messenger
When asked by Imam Ali (May Allah be pleased with him) to describe his way of life, the Noble Messenger of Allah is reported to have said:
- Meditation in Allah is my Capitol
- Reason and logic are the roots of my Deen
- Love is the foundation of my Existence
- Enthusiasm is the vehicle of my life
- Contemplation of Allah is my Companion
- Faith is the source of my power
- Sorrow is my friend
- Knowledge is my shield
- Patience is my Garb and Virtue
- Submission to the Divine Will is my Pride
- Truth is my Salvation
- Worship is my habit
- And in Salat lies the coolness of my eyes and Peace of Mind.
Also I have to practise how to pray and do wudu it's very important,I know.I am happy to join thins site and good to meet you and help each other.Alhamdulilah I consider that I am half Muslim but I hope I'll become full Muslim soon.Inshallah.---O Allah,Guide me to the right and give me more strength and courage as You know what I have deep inside and You only knows the best.I need You severely and don't let me wander on my journey. Ameen---Wasalam.
O Allah I am so thankful to You and excuse me 'cause You know everything. 
