:salam2:
I have a girlfriend and she is going through a depression. I don´t know how to help her. I´m really confused. She says that she firmly believs in Islam but she can not live according it.... she starts praying and then she abandonents it... again and again... She is in a depression because she knows that she is comiting sins and she can not live acording Islam in long terms.... she is scared that she will never be succesfull in repenting with sincerity to Allah....
What would you advice to someone who wants to repent but just can not stop sinning. Especially because she is not living in an islamic environment.
Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, send this to her:
Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, my sister Allah is wanting to help and guide you that is why you came here for your problem to be resolved by the will and mercy of Allah and that is why you are feeling inclined in coming much more closer to Allah.
Allah's mercy, compassion and forgiveness are all encompassing and his mercy is one of his most important and significant qualities of the almighty in the Qur’an, as well as in the saying and teachings of Prophet Muhammad (Pbuh).
In a Hadith Qudsi Allah states: "My mercy prevails over My wrath."
The Prophet also once said:
Allah, the Almighty, says: Whosoever does a good deed, will have (reward) ten times like it and I add more; and whosoever does an evil, will have the punishment like it or I will forgive (him); and whosoever approaches Me by one span, I will approach him by one cubit; and whosoever approaches Me by one cubit, I approach him by one fathom, and whosoever comes to Me walking, I go to him running; and whosoever meets Me with an earth-load of sins without associating anything with Me, I meet him with forgiveness like that. (Sahih Muslim)
Approximately 113 chapters of the Holy Qur’an begin with: "In the name of Allah the Most-Compassionate; the Most-Merciful".
This is a constant reminder to all who read the Qur’an of the great mercy, compassion and forgiveness of almighty Allah. So do not despair my sister for whatever wrongs we have done if we repent sincerely with the intention to NEVER commit it again then Allah will forgive us.
My Sister if we don’t keep consistent with our deen then our imaan (faith) will decrease and we will be far from Allah and our deen.
If we don’t let go of our love for this world and worldly things then how can our imaan (faith) remain high? So we have to forsake the love for this world and realise that this world is just temporary and our life in this world can end at ANY second!
My Sister we should thank Allah so much everyday because firstly out of BILLIONS of people that he's created he chose US and gave US imaan(faith)!
He didn’t have to, he could of created us non believers and he could have created us in ANY time period in history like in the dark ages or in the medieval times or some other terrible time uncivilised time period but he created us in a relatively safe environment in one of the richest countries in the world with luxury, food on a plate everyday, anything we want and all we have to do is look at the unfortunate people who have NOTHING and we will truly realise how lucky we really are and that Allah has given us EVERYTHING!
Many times I have been to my native Pakistan and seen the poor there and I just feel SO lucky sister that what Allah has given us compared to these people. I saw a paralysed guy ROLLING around on the streets because he couldn’t walk or afford a wheel chair.
My Sister the amount of poverty that people are experiencing in this world and the position Allah has put us in we should constantly be in prostration to him and thank him SO much! We are SO lucky my Sister and we still complain about this and that and minor things but we should be ever thankful to Allah night and day!
We take for granted what he has given us! He could have created us paralysed or with a terrible debilitating disease but no my Sister he has given us health, wealth and best of all imaan (faith) and now he is wanting to guide us that is why were want to go towards him!
The ONLY thing stopping us from going towards Allah is ourselves because know that shaythan can just whisper but it is our choice whether we listen or not. We are given free will to choose which path we want to take and we HAVE to make the effort to go towards him and get into our deen.
Every single day we should try to imagine and contemplate the favours Allah has done for us and everything he has given us and only then we will ALWAYS remain so thankful and appreciative of Allah because my Sister SO many people are suffering in this world and all around us but were not always aware. We may look at some people around us and think to ourselves they look happy and content but only Allah knows the most terrible hardships that they are going through.
I know you may have been through a lot in your past my sister and so have many of us, but what we have to realise is that we are so such luckier compared to most people in this world! We should ALWAYS look at those who have less than us and we should NEVER at those who have more than us!
You may look at a person who you think has more than you but how do you know what they are going through in life? We don't because it is not always advertised what people are going through. They may be going through things we can never even imagine going through so do not let how a person looks on the outside decieve you into thinking that they are happy because only Allah knows best and a lot of people are going through MUCH tougher tests than we are.
So my sister let us feel so lucky because we truly are so so lucky! You still got through whatever happened to you in the past and you will continue getting through whatever life throws at you. You are the person you are today because of what has happened to you in life! Your a fighter and your struggled but with Allah's help you got through it so should we not turn to the one who created us and helps us through our lives?
Look at our poor brothers and sisters in war torn countries and those who are being oppressed by their governments who don’t even allow them to practise their deen, yet where we are our governments do allow us to practise our deen properly without any problems.
Even though we sin day in and day out our almighty creator still provides for us, nourishes us, sustains us and gives us EVERYTHING we need EVERYDAY OF OUR LIVES! He remains patient waiting for us to go towards him everyday but our luck can run out ANY second!
My Sister we are so lucky if ONLY we knew and realised how much so. Even after our imaan (faith) goes down, Allah is still trying to guide us and that is why we feel inclined in our hearts to go towards him and be the closest to him!
All we have to Sister is to make the little effort in comparison with EVERYTHING Allah has given us! But yet we still fail to do the little required of us to change and go towards Allah!
He gave us life, health and working limbs when there are people out there who have limbs missing or are deformed and retarded and look at us! He has given us EVERY SINGLE THING and yet we still struggle to give even a little back and thank him by praying to him for just a few minutes a day.
Even if we were to spend eternity trying to imagine what Allah has given us and the amount of favours he has done for us, we would NEVER be able to even begin to imagine!
My Sister happiness and contentment of the heart ONLY lies with Allah! Whether we gain this happiness and true contentment really depends on how obedient we are to Allah's commandments and how much we really strive to do what he asks of us!
Remember everything that is good comes from Allah and everything bad that happens comes from us and our own wrong doings! Also Allah tests his creations in MANY different ways!
He may test us in any aspect of our lives! He says in the Qur'an as well that do you think that you will not be tested? What is the point and purpose of life if we are not to be tried and tested by Allah?
Allah just wants to see how we will react when we are tested! Will we go closer to shaythan? or closer to Allah? So my Sister it is clear that Allah is testing you because he wants you can become closer to him. This is not a privilege that everyone has.
Why should we let shaythan win? For Allah tests a person so that he may see if the person will go closer to him or further away!
Who were the people who were tested the most? They were the prophets! Do you know why? Because they were the best of all creation! So the more Allah tests us the more he wants us to be closer to him and if we bare the tests with patience then know that Allah is with those who are patient and the reward for patience can only be jannah (Paradise)! Subhanallah
It is shaythan who wants us to become closer to him and will we let him? He ONLY wants our destruction!
He tries EVERYTHING in his power to try and keep us away from our deen by trying by distracting us with the deceptions of this world but will we let him?
He constantly tries to make us forget our purpose for It is shaythan who wants to make us lose faith in Allah and trying to make us give up hope and get depressed and confused!
He tries to mess with our minds and make us lose hope and self esteem and then tells us that our lives are pointless and worthless so why not give up?
It is shaythan who wants to see our destruction in this world and the next! Will we let him do this to us and let him win? Will we let him jeopardise our imaan(faith) and bring us to total destruction in this world and the next?
All shaythan can do is whisper in our ears and tell us to do something but it is upto us whether we will listen or not! we are beings with free will and free choice to do what we want. So will we follow our desires and the whispers of shaythan and be in loss forever? Or will we ONLY strive to listen to Allah and gain eternal success in this world and the next? Its logical who we should listen to but why don't we?
For us it is easier to sin that to do good, but that is because were in the habit of sinning so much that were used to it. Were in the habit of missing namaz day in day out so its a normal thing for us. We hardly think about Allah and what is to come in the afterlife but continue to think about our life in this world and our future. How do we know we have a future? How do we know whether our time will come now or later? If it does come now what have we got to show for what we have done in our life to try and please Allah?
We need to get into the habit of doing good deeds and praying ALL of our salat and then it will be easier for us to do good deeds and when we get so used to doing good deeds and sinning less then when we do happened to do a sin we would be much more guilty about it and strive not to do it again.
We should NEVER give up hope and give in to shaythan! This is exactly what shaythan wants! He can only whisper but WE HAVE THE POWER OVER OURSELVES! We have FULL control over our mind and body so let us take back control and use our mind and body and focus it towards bettering ourselves as Muslims and going towards our deen and Allah! Let us NEVER give up hope in Allah and NEVER give into shaythan because you are STRONGER than him and you can overcome him it is in you!
This life is a test and what kind of test would it be if there was'nt evil and temptation around us? Life is full of hurdles for the path to Jannah is not an easy one and why should it be? We have to earn our place in Jannah just like we earnt our degrees. If we get closer to Allah then our journey to Jannah will be a very easy one because we would have Allah by our side and when we get tested we would bare it with patience and have full hope, reliance and trust in Allah! But if were far away from our deen and Allah then we will be on a very rocky road to knowhere and eventually destruction!
The problem is because were far away from our deen and Allah it is MUCH harder for us to do good deeds and pray to Allah with full commitment. That is why it is crucial that we get closer to our deen and Allah so that we find it easier to do good and feel more guilt when we do bad.
Even my parents weren't religious at all but when i started to get into Islam my mother also followed and started reading her namaz and then my sisters followed but when i started getting into Islam NO1 at all was practicing, so you should know that i only came into Islam from Allah's guidance and i made full effort because i really wanted to get closer to Allah and i really wanted to get into Islam because i know it is the ONLY truth and the ONLY way to eternal success!
Its never easy because we always have shaythan and our desires trying to get in our way but if we keep consistant in our deen and ALWAYS turn towards Allah then NOTHING can stop us! If Allah guides someone then NO ONE can misguide them but if Allah misguides someone then NO ONE can guide them.
Once you start praying properly and coming towards Islam then one wqill bring noor(light) and blessings into the household and other members of the household will also benefit from it, so will you not pray and read Qur'an so that your house gets full with this noor and blessings?
My sister Allah ONLY created us for one purpose and that is to worship him! He created us to provide for ourselves in this world but it is him who has given us the ability to work! He has given us the mental ability and capacity and he has given us the health and energy in our muscles so that we may work! He is our employer and he is our wage giver! He sustains and he has given us the ability to earn for ourselves. This does not mean that we should let this affect our actual purpose in this life! We should always keep a balance between what we do for this world and what we do for the hereafter.
My sister Its just about making a routine for ourselves! If we have a daily routine of work, praying remembrance of Allah, reading the Qur'an and learning about Islam then we are more likely to stick to it and implement it throughout our daily life.
When you get into the habit of praying my sister then everything will become easier for you. It is just right now shaythan is trying to make you think its impossible for you and he is trying to make you think that you can't do it and that it is not in your capacity to do it but he is just trying to knock your confidence in yourself! You have the ability to do ANYTHING!
Once you get into the habit of praying you will NEVER look back again and you will think why did'nt i start earlier! I believe in you sister and know you can do this for you are MUCH stronger than shaythan and you can get into the habit of namaz without any problems but you have to act NOW and NEVER put this off again and say soon or tmorrow because tomorrow or soon NEVER comes but NOW is the time my sister!
Shaythan tries EVERYTHING in his power to try and keep us away from our deen by trying by distracting us with the deceptions of this world but will we let him?
We should not pray Salah just when it is convenient for us but we should strive to pray it regardless of whatever were doing whether were at work, university, hospital or wherever we are.
Yes in some circumstances it may be a test for us to pray salah because we have to make that little bit more effort but if Allah has given us everything we can imagine then can we not make that little but of effort for him? Is he not the one who gave us that job in the first place? Is he not the one who created us and is providing sustanance for us every single day? So why can we not make the effort to pray to him whatever situation or circumstances were in?
Shaythan constantly tries to make us forget our purpose for It is shaythan who wants to make us lose faith in Allah and trying to make us give up hope and get depressed and confused! He tries to mess with our minds and make us lose hope and self esteem and then tells us that our lives are pointless and worthless so why not give up? It is shaythan who wants to see our destruction in this world and the next! Will we let him do this to us and let him win? Will we let him jeopardise our imaan(faith) and bring us to total destruction in this world and the next?
My Sister Allah has not asked much from us in this life compared to what he's got on offer for us in the hereafter! Allah has just asked us for full obedience to him for such a short amount of time- (70 years to the most) and in return for our obedience he has promised us ETERENITY of bliss!
So that's: Obedience to Allah for the duration of our very short lives = Eternity of bliss in the hereafter
Is that not the most amazing offer one can EVER imagine or comprehend? On top of that Allah has given us everything we need, life, shelter, wealth, food, clothing I can go on and on about the favours of Allah FOREVER because his favours unto us are infinite and we will NEVER be able to comprehend what he has done for us!
So not only has Allah provided us with everything we can imagine but he has asked us to do a little in return for an eternity of bliss and we still can't manage it? Were pathetic its as simple as that!
There is 1440 minutes in a day and on average all the salah if we add it up takes around 40 minutes in total a day so thats 40 minutes for Allah out of 1440 minutes in a day thats just 3% of our day that we need to pray to Allah and we still can't manage that! We are truly pathetic and we will truly regret it on the day of judgement FOREVER and by then it would have been too late!
My sister for EVERYTHING Allah has given us can we not even manage to spend 40 minutes out of 1440 minutes for him? He does'nt need us at all sister for we need him!
Allah just wants the best for us in this world and the next and he tells us in the Qur'an that righteousness and piety is the path to success in this world and the next! Simply following Allah's commands wholeheartedly will lead to success in this world and the next!
This life for us can end at ANY second Sister as we have seen for ourselves and still see on the news and all around us people dying and those people are not old at all they are people of ALL ages, ethnicities, backgrounds and religions! No matter who we are and what our situation or position is in life when our time is up then death will take us for death does not wait a second more it will take us when our time is up and NO ONE knows when that will be but Allah!
We know too well how temporary our life is and we should realise that if we waste our lives away more than we have already done then surely we will surely regret all the time we wasted on the day of judgement because ONLY then will we realise the true value of the time we had and the amount of GREAT opportunities we missed out on to do good and go towards Allah!
There will be MANY on the day of Qiyamat that will ask Allah for just one more chance and opportunity to have another shot at life and another chance to do things right this time but NO ONE will be given another chance for THIS is our ONLY chance! If we waste this opportunity then we WILL regret it FOREVER! That's a guarantee!
Allah will say have I not given you enough chances in this world to change and be obedient to me?
We wouldn't want to die at this point in our lives right now because we know that we have prepared NOTHING! What have we prepared to show Allah when he asks us what we did with our lives? We have NOTHING to show! We should be VERY worried indeed!
One time the Prophet (Pbuh) saw some people laughing out aloud and they were laughing a lot and the Prophet (Pbuh) said that if these people knew what was to come then they would NOT laugh at all!
This proves that the Prophet (Pbuh) knew what was to come and he knew that if we had the knowledge he did then we would be VERY worried indeed but we don't realise because were asleep and we by the time we wake up it will be too late! So we HAVE to wake up now! Otherwise if we die and have nothing to show Allah of our lives then we are doomed and we would not be able to handle a second of punishment.
My Sister my dear friend died this past Ramadan just gone and he was only 28years of age and my first cousin sister died recently she was only 26. My Sister life is just so uncertain. How do we know when our time is up? The thing is we don't know that is why we HAVE to prepare now! Otherwise there may not be a tomorrow!
If we CONSTANTLY remind ourselves of death then we will NEVER slack in our deen because we would know that the angel of death may take us ANY second!
We get SOO many chances from Allah everyday but yet again and again we don't take those opportunities for we keep letting them pass but what if at ANY second our last chance is up? Then we will not get anymore!
So it’s best for us to try and change ourselves now! Let’s do our best to abide by the commandments of Allah and go closer to him because he is our beloved creator and he knows what’s best for us we don't! Allah says in the Qur'an that we humans know not what is best for us but Allah does. We think we do but we clearly don't.
Surely our creator knows because he has created everything we see and imagine! So let us put our FULL trust in him and strive to get the closest to our beloved creator who gave us life!
We should NOT keep dwelling on our past now or the bad experiences we went through because our past has made us who we are today! Let us take lessons from our past and learn from it and do things better now and the future!
It will do us absolutely no good by being down about what has happened in the past! Being depressed or down about the past and life I general and losing hope and faith will NEVER benefit us but cause our doom and destruction because that is what shaythan wants! He wants to mess our heads up and distract us ANYWAY he can!
If we think to ourselves that life is too short to be down or lose hope and faith and that i should spend most of my time working for the next life then this is the best way to live our lives because what is the point of investing time and efforts in this world when those efforts are for something that is temporary and could end at ANYTIME!
We should not waste a single second more being down or depressed for we should remember Allah as much as we can otherwise we will regret the seconds we did not spend remembering Allah.
Hadhrat Mu'az [RA] narrated Rasulallah (Peace be upon him) said: “The Inhabitants of Paradise will not be grief stricken or sorrowful about anything they did in the life of the world except for the time they spent without being in the remembrance of Allah” (Tabaraani)
We need to keep thinking to ourselves that EVERYTHING that happens around us and in our lives happens because of the will of Allah so whatever will happen will happen anyway so there is NO point of us being worried about it or down or depressed about it because we have NO control over it!
We cannot change it and it is not in our control so why should we not do the best we can in our own lives and accept that whatever happen then it is Allah's choice and he wanted it to happen because he knows best for us and we are just his creations so we do not know what is best for us in this life.
"I have no time to be down or depressed in this life because whatever will happen in life will happen and I have no control over it for everything happens from the will of Allah alone. I have to try and make the best of EVERY second of my own life because my life in this world can end at ANYSECOND!
So I need to do as much good as possible and try my best to please Allah as much as I can otherwise I will regret it forever! There is no time or need for me to be down or depressed because I rely on Allah for EVERYTHING and I depend on him and put my hopes and trust in him and I put my FULL FAITH in him because he created me and NOTHING will happen to me without his will so I’m FULLY reliant on Allah!"
Say this to yourself with FULL sincerity and conviction EVERY morning and every time you begin to feel down or depressed and inshallah you will realise that there is NO need to EVER get down or depressed and you will have no time to EVER be down or depressed.
Why not spend most of our time and efforts on the hereafter which is for ETERNITY? Any investment we put into the hereafter will benefit us forever and we will wreak the rewards for eternity! But if we put all of our efforts just into this world then how much will we really gain from it? Very little or nothing at all!
The person who chases this world will only get what is destined for him but the person who chases the hereafter will get more from this world and from the hereafter! So who is the winner?
We have all done mistakes in our lifetime and sometimes we wish that we can get hold of a time machine and do things differently! We wish we could go back into the past and change things so that things could have been different now but what is the point of thinking this way? Whatever has happened has happened and will NEVER change! Even if the world was to be created again whatever will happen will happen because it is ordained by Allah and his will!
We are wasting even more time thinking this way when we could be using this precious time in doing things better now and the future because that’s what really counts not what has already happened!
Let’s move on and NOT think and dwell about the past because our life experiences make us who we are and have made us wiser people when in the past we were inexperienced in life and naive!
Sometimes in life we have to learn the hard way because the hard way is the best way to learn at times and we have to just accept what’s happened and move on because life goes on but we don't know for how long! We have to realise how precious time is!
So lets forget the past now and move on and do the BEST we can now and the future in pleasing Allah and trying to be the closest to him and repenting our past sins because if we repent with full sincerity with the intention of NEVER doing it again then Allah almighty will forgive us Inshallah that’s how merciful he is!
Continued
say, "A servant committed a sin and he said, "O Allah, I have committed a sin, so forgive me." Allah said, "Does My servant know that he has a Lord Who forgives sins and helps him? I forgive My servant." After some time, the man committed another sin so he said, "O my Lord, I have committed another sin, so forgive me." His Lord said, "Does My servant know that he has a Lord Who forgives sins and helps him? I forgive My servant." After some time, the man committed yet another sin so he said, "O my Lord, I have committed another sin, so forgive me." His Lord said, "Does My servant know that he has a Lord Who forgives sins and helps him? O servant, do what you like. I have granted you forgiveness."
