help with a question please.

[justoneofmillion]

:salam2:Brothers and sisters what are you doing!some of you guys are really funny! (in good ways)Sister sarah affair!justify my desires through a fatwah! whose post are you reading,read my post again please would you please kindly do so.May Allah bless you.
I was talking about what the sister Mariami mentioned above,so i said" i think i know what you are talking about"and i also said that i did not like the idea eventough some scholars like ibn baaz rahimahou llah said it was okay!wish i could find a translation for you guys.i ll post it if i do.

Guys am not doing anything wrong,please refrain from throwing stones at me!Am still fasting let me at least finish the week,and regain my strength.:fighta:That is what she wants as she was the one that purposed the whole matter.
I have had a very difficult period this year,i was going to marry the woman that i really wanted to marry,but she is in another country,parents made things very hard for us...etc It s too complicated,but it hasn t been easy,on the other hands i don t have parents who could speak out for me they took advantage of that in the most cruel and inhuman manner,it deosn matter for me am used to it.But she is not even their daughter they were only her adoptive parents as hers died when she was a little baby still...so she must take care of their buisness ,stay there and god know what else they put on her.And until i finish my school am stuck in Europe,on the other hands her parents won t let her live where i am,they have turned her life into a living hell!
However thanks guys for responding eventough some of you deduced what i didn t mean.well maybe i did not express myself clearly enough so the blame is likely to be on my side.It is hard for a brother to talk about stuff like that,it was getting too heavy so i thought of asking your advices.Hope i did no wrong.

Appa you hit the nail as always.thanks
Akhi munawar ,right on jazakhallahu khair. a.All the others i love you too for the sake of Allah swt.

Hey look what i found as well there are alaming statistics given by brother khalid yassin take a look they are horrible i was n t even aware of this.

[vg]216944976405020501&hl=de[/vg]

 

[Aapa]

Salaam,


With all your intellect you are human. I wish I was near by to give you additional motherly love.
Just remember most of the members are young and have little or no idea of life. It is easy to be a Monday morning quaterback..however it is another thing to have the ball in your hand and a defensive team ready to attack on Sunday afternoon.
Pray and listen to the direction that Allah subhana talla directs you.

 

[justoneofmillion]

:salam2:here is what i was talking about in english.
Note this is not my view,i don t like the idea either, but i think this is what the sister was referring to

Misyaar marriage: definition and rulings
Question:
Misyaar marriage was mentioned on your website. What is this marriage? Is it halaal or ha (more)

Misyaar marriage: definition and rulings
Question:
Misyaar marriage was mentioned on your website. What is this marriage? Is it halaal or haraam?.

Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly:

Misyaar marriage is where a man does a shar’i marriage contract with a woman, meeting the conditions of marriage, but the woman gives up some of her rights such as accommodation, maintenance or the husband’s staying overnight with her.

The reasons that have led to the emergence of this kind of marriage are many, such as:

1.

Increase in the number of single women who are unable to get married, because young men are put off marriage due to the high cost of dowries and the costs of marriage, or because there is a high divorce rate. In such circumstances, some women will agree to be a second or third wife and to give up some of their rights.

2.

Some women need to stay in their family home, either because they are the only care-givers for family members, or because the woman has a handicap and her family do not want the husband to be burdened with something he cannot bear, and he stays in touch with her without having to put too great a burden on himself, or because she has children and cannot move with them to her husband’s house, and other reasons.

3.

Some married men want to keep some women chaste because they need that, or because they need variety and halaal pleasure, without that affecting the first wife and her children.

4.

In some cases a husband may want to conceal his second marriage from his first wife, for fear of the consequences that may result and affect their relationship.

5.

The man travels often to a certain place and stays there for lengthy periods. Undoubtedly staying there with a wife is safer for him than not doing so.

These are the most prominent reasons for the emergence of this kind of marriage.

Secondly:

The scholars differed concerning the ruling on this type of marriage, and there are several opinions, ranging from the view that it is permissible, to the view that it is permitted but makrooh, or that it is not allowed. Here we should point out several things.

1.

None of the scholars have said that it is invalid or is not correct; rather they disallowed it because of the consequences that adversely affect the woman, as it is demeaning to her, and that affects the society as this marriage contract is taken advantage of by bad people, because a woman could claim that a boyfriend is a husband. It also affects the children whose upbringing will be affected by their father’s absence.

2.

Some of those who said that it was permissible have retracted that view. Among the most prominent scholars who said that it was permissible were Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz and Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez Aal al-Shaykh; and among the most prominent scholars who said that it was permissible and then retracted it was Shaykh al-‘Uthaymeen; among the most prominent scholars who said that it is not allowed at all was Shaykh al-Albaani.

3.

Those who said that it is permissible did not say that a time limit should be set as in the case of mut’ah. And they did not say that it is permissible without a wali (guardian), because marriage without a wali is invalid. And they did not say that the marriage contract may be done without witnesses or without being announced, rather it is essential to do one of the two.

Thirdly:

Opinion of the scholars concerning this type of marriage:

1.

Shaykh Ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him) was asked about Misyaar marriage; this kind of marriage is where the man marries a second, third or fourth wife, and the wife is in a situation that compels her to stay with her parents or one of them in her own house, and the husband goes to her at various times depending on the circumstances of both. What is the Islamic ruling on this type of marriage?

He replied:

There is nothing wrong with that if the marriage contract fulfils all the conditions set out by sharee’ah, which is the presence of the wali and the consent of both partners, and the presence of two witnesses of good character to the drawing up of the contract, and both partners being free of any impediments, because of the general meaning of the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “The conditions that are most deserving of being fulfilled are those by means of which intimacy becomes permissible for you†and “The Muslims are bound by their conditions.†If the partners agree that the woman will stay with her family or that her share of the husband’s time will be during the day and not during the night, or on certain days or certain nights, there is nothing wrong with that, so long as the marriage is announced and not hidden. End quote.

Fataawa ‘Ulama’ al-Balad al-Haraam (p. 450, 451) and Jareedah al-Jazeerah issue no. 8768, Monday 18 Jumaada al-Oola 1417 AH.

However, some students of the Shaykh said that he later retracted the view that it is permissible, but we could not find anything in writing to prove that.

2.

Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez Aal al-Shaykh (may Allaah preserve him) was asked:

There is a lot of talk about misyaar marriage being haraam or halaal. We would like a definitive statement about this matter from you, with a description of its conditions and obligations, if it is permissible.

He replied:

The conditions of marriage are that the two partners should be identified and give their consent, and there should be a wali (guardian) and two witnesses. If the conditions are met and the marriage is announced, and they do not agree to conceal it, either the husband, the wife or their guardians, and he offered a waleemah or wedding feast, then this marriage is valid, and you can call it whatever you want after that. End quote.

Jareedah al-Jazeerah, Friday 15 Rabee’ al-Thaani 1422 AH, issue no. 10508.

3.

Shaykh al-Albaani was asked about Misyaar marriage and he disallowed it for two reasons:

(i)

That the purpose of marriage is repose as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “And among His Signs is this, that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy. Verily, in that are indeed signs for a people who reflect†al-Room 30:21. But this is not achieved in this kind of marriage.
(ii)

It may be decreed that the husband has children with this woman, but because he is far away from her and rarely comes to her, that will be negatively reflected in his children’s upbringing and attitude.

See: Ahkaam al-Ta’addud fi Daw’ al-Kitaab wa’l-Sunnah (p. 28, 29).

4.

Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) used to say that it was permissible, then he stopped saying that because of the negative effects, as it was poorly applied by some wrongdoers.

Finally, what we think is:

That if Misyaar marriage fulfils the conditions of a valid marriage, namely the proposal and acceptance, the consent of the wali and witnesses or announcement of the marriage, then it is a valid marriage contract, and it is good for some categories of men and women whose circumstances call for this type of marriage. But this may be taken advantage of by some whose religious commitment is weak, hence this permissibility should not be described as general in application in a fatwa, rather the situation of each couple should be examined, and if this kind of marriage is good for them then it should be permitted, otherwise they should not be allowed to do it. That is to prevent marriage for the sake of mere pleasure whilst losing the other benefits of marriage, and to prevent the marriage of two people whose marriage we may be certain is likely to fail and in which the wife will be neglected, such as one who will be away from his wife for many months, and will leave her on her own in an apartment, watching TV and visiting chat rooms and going on the inte. How can such a weak woman spend her time? This is different from one who lives with her family or children and has enough religious commitment, obedience, chastity and modesty to help her be patient during her husband’s absence.

And Allaah knows best.

Islam Q&A

http://www.islamonline.com/news/newsfull.php?newid=97148
wassalaam
jameel

 

[ShyHijabi]

Salaam,

Brother, my response about the affair was directed at brother Massi, not you.

I think I am confused as to what you are asking?

Are you speaking about marrying someone with the intention to divorce her in the future? PLease answer this in a straightforward manner.

Wasalaam

~Sarah

 

[justoneofmillion]

Salaam,

Brother, my response about the affair was directed at brother Massi, not you.

I think I am confused as to what you are asking?

Are you speaking about marrying someone with the intention to divorce her in the future? PLease answer this in a straightforward manner.

Wasalaam

~Sarah

:salam2:Yes but i did not try to justify it through a fatwa ukhti.
I know it is wrong,however this doesn t eliminate the fact that more awareness about such matters should be developed. Parents have to let their children marry as long as they are striving to be good Muslims, if the the man can provide and if they love each other and wanna do so.

They can not put their interests before their children's and the ummah s interest,because of race color,status , culture or anything other than takwa, less they would become a source of fitnah on earth.I dont mind being the lab rate in this case just call me Gerry .look at the video it gives some numbers about what is going on in a broader context in our communities. i couldnt believe it....Everybody is concerned about educating the youth but forgot to educate the parents about certain social dynamics their children are raised in,through the process.And this is not a minor problem ,we can try to ignore it but it is certainly not something that offers the option of being neglected.

wassalaam
jameel

wassalaam
jameel

 

[a_brother]

:salam2:Yes but i did not try to justify it through a fatwa ukhti.
I know it is wrong,however this doesn t eliminate the fact that more awareness about such matters should be developed. Parents have to let their children marry as long as they are striving to be good Muslims, if the the man can provide and if they love each other and wanna do so.

They can not put their interests before their children's and the ummah s interest,because of race color,status , culture or anything other than takwa, less they would become a source of fitnah on earth.I dont mind being the lab rate in this case,look at the video it gives some numbers about what is going on in a broader context in our comminities. i couldnt believe it....Everybody is concerned about educating the youth but forgot to educate the parents about certain social dynamics their children are raised in,through the process.And this is not a minor problem ,we can try to ignore it but it is certainly not something that offers the option of being neglected.

wassalaam
jameel

wassalaam
jameel

:salam2:

you right brother...

where some brothers end up getting married to non-muslim females since many marriage with muslim sisters is "harder/tougher" in the west!!!

I am tired of trying to "promote" marriage as been a very important part in our ummah!!!... *sigh*

wasalamo alaikom

 

[Maryam Sayyidina]

:salam2:
misunderstanding is it people?
actually our brother Jameel here try to asking or confirm the fatwa?or?
I just catch from his post he's asking the fatwa about mut'aa marriage and he considering whether he will do it because the girl seems agree with the mutaa marriage concepts.
Correction please if I misunderstood too:lol:

when this kind of things happen...
Originally Posted by ShyHijabi View Post
Salaam,

Brother, my response about the affair was directed at brother Massi, not you.

Maybe when someone want to reply post should direct tell which post they want to reply. I think is not hard just retype the person's name that we want to put reply or comment to.
e.g. To sister Maryam: I think bla bla...

 

[seeking_the_truth]

Ok i am not muslim and i have read everything on this post my question is why do u want to marry this woman? If you don't love her than it doesn't seem right to marry her just because she said that you should do it so that you can live together. If you are planning on marrying someone else later than you should wait and find that person that you want to spend the rest of your life with. I would think if you are thinking of divorceing this woman later that would be a sign in itself that you shouldn't do it.

 

[Shahzad]

no brother jameel, either completely adopt her, or leave her. Dont do wat u r thinking.

FEAR ALLAH

 

[justoneofmillion]

no brother jameel, either completely adopt her, or leave her. Dont do wat u r thinking.

FEAR ALLAH

:salam2:Akhi adopt her!she is about 8 centimeters shorter than me!about 1.82 which is huge for a woman

Thanks for the advice

wassalaam
jameel

 

[palestine]

it's allowed to marry from ahlul kitab. but my question to you is why go through all of this? why marry a woman whom you're planning not to spend the rest of your life with? brother why place yourself in the midst of a difficult situation. was the girl from your childhood muslim? if so and ur parents refused, how do you think they would react to a non muslim girl? brother if you truly loved the girl from your childhood, i would advice that you marry her. i know that in islam you must respect your parents, but there are two things you're allowed to do , refuse them if they tell you that you cannot worship Allah and refusing them in marriage. it's wrong to make someone lose their love. and you as a guy are allowed to go to an imam and get married to this childhood girl you mentioned. akhi i'm really sick of hearing and seeing muslim parents making their children miserable. you must respect your parents, but do not listen to them in that which they're wrong in. go back to that girl and marry her inshaAllah. but advice them one more time before you do so, and this time make it serious and clear to them. i would not advice that you marry this non muslim girl. why? firstly your just OK with her, you don't REALLY LOVE her from your words. and besides why all that hassle of marrying and then divorcing. what's the point of that. anyhow my advice to you: marry the girl from your childhood, because your first love is something you can never forget and you will regret in the future. akhi make istikhara, keep praying and making dua and talk to your parents even if they don't listen. you MUST marry the childhood girl. my heart is broken to hear such things as this. and what of my future? i'm afraid as well. asalamu alaykum wrwb.

 

[justoneofmillion]

it's allowed to marry from ahlul kitab. but my question to you is why go through all of this? why marry a woman whom you're planning not to spend the rest of your life with? brother why place yourself in the midst of a difficult situation. was the girl from your childhood muslim? if so and ur parents refused, how do you think they would react to a non muslim girl? brother if you truly loved the girl from your childhood, i would advice that you marry her. i know that in islam you must respect your parents, but there are two things you're allowed to do , refuse them if they tell you that you cannot worship Allah and refusing them in marriage. it's wrong to make someone lose their love. and you as a guy are allowed to go to an imam and get married to this childhood girl you mentioned. akhi i'm really sick of hearing and seeing muslim parents making their children miserable. you must respect your parents, but do not listen to them in that which they're wrong in. go back to that girl and marry her inshaAllah. but advice them one more time before you do so, and this time make it serious and clear to them. i would not advice that you marry this non muslim girl. why? firstly your just OK with her, you don't REALLY LOVE her from your words. and besides why all that hassle of marrying and then divorcing. what's the point of that. anyhow my advice to you: marry the girl from your childhood, because your first love is something you can never forget and you will regret in the future. akhi make istikhara, keep praying and making dua and talk to your parents even if they don't listen. you MUST marry the childhood girl. my heart is broken to hear such things as this. and what of my future? i'm afraid as well. asalamu alaykum wrwb.

:salam2:Her parents sister. It is the other way around...
jazakhallahu khair for your suggestions
wassalaam
jameel

 

[palestine]

oh my bad. her parents. my Allah. still i wish i was with you at the moment so i can slap you on the head to make you go and get her. lol. sorry but i hate seeing people losing their love. i just hate it. and i just feel that i can help people if i'm near them (yeah right). so just pretend i'm hammering you on the head and making you get up from my annoying words. lol. asalamu alaykum and hope all goes well. inshaAllah it will. don't lose hope(and you better not young man). this is grandma's time and you better listen.

 

[al-muslimah]

it's allowed to marry from ahlul kitab. but my question to you is why go through all of this? why marry a woman whom you're planning not to spend the rest of your life with? brother why place yourself in the midst of a difficult situation. was the girl from your childhood muslim? if so and ur parents refused, how do you think they would react to a non muslim girl? brother if you truly loved the girl from your childhood, i would advice that you marry her. i know that in islam you must respect your parents, but there are two things you're allowed to do , refuse them if they tell you that you cannot worship Allah and refusing them in marriage. it's wrong to make someone lose their love. and you as a guy are allowed to go to an imam and get married to this childhood girl you mentioned. akhi i'm really sick of hearing and seeing muslim parents making their children miserable. you must respect your parents, but do not listen to them in that which they're wrong in. go back to that girl and marry her inshaAllah. but advice them one more time before you do so, and this time make it serious and clear to them. i would not advice that you marry this non muslim girl. why? firstly your just OK with her, you don't REALLY LOVE her from your words. and besides why all that hassle of marrying and then divorcing. what's the point of that. anyhow my advice to you: marry the girl from your childhood, because your first love is something you can never forget and you will regret in the future. akhi make istikhara, keep praying and making dua and talk to your parents even if they don't listen. you MUST marry the childhood girl. my heart is broken to hear such things as this. and what of my future? i'm afraid as well. asalamu alaykum wrwb.

:salam2:
sister im so curious to know where does it say in islam that you can refuse your parents in marrige? plese refere to the quran or sunna. shukran!

 

[ShyHijabi]

:salam2:
sister im so curious to know where does it say in islam that you can refuse your parents in marrige? plese refere to the quran or sunna. shukran!

I am muslim. I have to ask a question about my friend who is being forced to marry someone by her parents. She wanted to marry someone else. The guy who she is being forced to marry is more educated and wealthy than the one who she wanted to marry. Her parents has disapproved of her choice and they are forcing her to marry that guy. The guy who she likes is also muslim and very much devoted into islam. But just because the society would not talk about them they don't like the guy who she loves. Any suggestions??


Praise be to Allaah.

It is not permissible for a woman to be made to marry someone she does not want. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “A previously-married woman should not be married without being consulted, and a virgin should not be married without asking her permission.” They said, “O Messenger of Allaah, how is her permission given?” He said, “By her silence.” (Reported by al-Bukhaari, 6455).

‘Aa’ishah reported that a girl came to her and said, “My father married me to his brother’s son in order to raise his social standing, and I did not want this marriage [I was forced into it].” ‘Aa’ishah said, “Sit here until the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) comes. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) came and she told him about the girl. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) sent for her father, then he gave the girl the choice of what to do. She said, “O Messenger of Allaah, I have accepted what my father did, but I wanted to prove something to other women.” (Reported by al-Nisaa’i, 3217).

So, both the guardian and the woman must agree to the marriage. With regard to your request for our advice regarding the problem mentioned in the question, so long as this marriage has taken place, it is better for the woman to try to keep it going as much as she can, and to try to accept this husband. She should seek reward through pleasing her parents and also try to reform her husband through a gentle approach and praying for guidance for him. And Allaah is the Source of Strength.


Islam Q&A
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

And for males..

I have got to know a girl who recently became Muslim (she was Christian before) and we have agreed to get married, but my family are strongly opposed to that.


Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly:

We hope that you will pay attention to the things you have done that go against sharee’ah, such as getting to know that girl who is a stranger (non-mahram) to you, talking to her, making friends with her and other shortcomings to which you have admitted. You should understand that these sins mean that you must give them up, regret doing them and resolve not to do them again, as well as praying a great deal for forgiveness and doing righteous deeds.

With regard to your relationship with this girl, it is not permissible for you to talk to her or see her, let alone make friends with her and be alone with her. It is good that you and she have thought of marriage, because it is the only legitimate shar’i way that you can be together, so do your best to attain that; but if that is not possible for you, then this relationship should be ended completely and perhaps Allaah will compensate you with someone better than her and will compensate her with someone better than you.

We have discussed the issue of correspondence between the sexes being haraam in the answer to question no. 26890 and 10221.

With regard to haraam infatuation and its effects, and marriage to the one with whom one is infatuated, please see the answer to question no. 47405.

Secondly:

With regard to your family’s objections to this marriage, you should note that the parents’ relationship to their son’s marriage may take several forms, such as the following;

1-

Not approving of any girl whom he chooses for himself as a wife.

2-

Not approving of a girl whom he chooses, but their objection is for legitimate shar’i reasons, such as if she has a bad reputation, or she is not Muslim – even though marriage to a Christian or Jewish woman is basically permissible.

3-

Not approving of a girl whom he chooses, but it is not for any legitimate shar’i reason, rather it is for personal or worldly reasons, such as if she is not beautiful or is not from a good family, and he is not infatuated with her and he does not fear any harm to himself if he does not marry her.

4-

The same scenario as that mentioned above, but he is infatuated with her, and fears fitnah for himself if he does not marry her.

5-

Forcing him to marry a girl whom they choose for him, even if she is religiously committed and of good character.

It seems to us from the rulings on the scenarios mentioned above that the son should obey his parents in the second and third cases, and that it is definitely obligatory for him to do so in the second case. In the second case the matter is clear and he has to obey them, because he is going to do something that is bad for their son and may also affect them.

In the third case it is permissible for him, but obeying them is obligatory, and what is obligatory takes precedence over what is permissible.

As for the first, fourth and fifth scenarios, it does not seem that he is obliged to obey them, because choosing a wife is the son’s right, not the parents’; they may intervene in some cases but not in all. Preventing him from marrying any girl he chooses, regardless of whether she is religiously-committed or not, is pointless and he does not have to obey them.

The same applies if he is infatuated with a woman and fears fitnah if he does not marry her. In this case he does not have to obey them if they tell him to leave her and not marry her, because that may lead to evil and fitnah that Islam came to prevent.

It is definite that he should not obey them in the fifth case, which is where they force him to marry a girl whom they have chosen. This is not a matter in which he is obliged to obey them. Rather it is akin to food and drink: he may choose whatever he wants to eat and drink, and they have no right to control that.

Ibn Muflih al-Hanbali (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:

The parents have no right to force their son to marry someone he does not want. Shaykh Taqiy al-Deen (i.e., Ibn Taymiyah – may Allaah have mercy on him) said: Neither of the parents has the right to force their son to marry someone whom he does not want, and if he refuses then he is not sinning by disobeying them, because no one has the right to force him to eat food he finds off-putting when there is food that he wants to eat, and marriage is like that and more so. Food that one is forced to eat is unpleasant for a short while, but a forced marriage lasts for a long time, and it harms a person and he cannot leave it. End quote.

Al-Adaab al-Shar’iyyah (1/447)

Based on this, we say:

If that girl has embraced Islam and become a good Muslim, and you are infatuated with her, and you fear fitnah if you leave her, then we think that you should marry her, even if your mother does not agree. That applies even more so if you fear that her religious commitment may be affected if she has no one to look after her.

We advise you to try to convince your parents so that you can combine two good things: obeying them and marrying the one with whom you are infatuated. You can get married without your mother’s knowledge, and try to guide her and advise her, and say du’aa’ for her and for your father.

You should remember that because it is permissible for you to marry whomever you want and you do not have to obey your parents (in this matter), you should not fear their du’aa’ against you or their being angry with you, because that is a sinful du’aa’ which Allaah will not accept from them, in sha Allaah, unless you are wronging them and transgressing against them. Because it is permissible for you to marry without adhering to their wishes, you will not be sinning or doing wrong.

See the answers to questions no. 82724 and 84052.

See also 21831 and 5512.

In those answers you will see more examples of that which we have discussed above.

See also the answer to question no. 5053 for a discussion on the rights that your mother has over you, and your rights over your mother.

Thirdly:

You should remember that it is not permissible for you to marry this girl without her having a wali (guardian). If she has a wali from among her family who is Muslim, then he must agree to the marriage – but a kaafir cannot be her guardian if she becomes Muslim. If there is no Muslim among her guardians then a Muslim should act as her wali, such as a shar’i judge (qaadi) or Mufti, or the imam of an Islamic centre. Whatever the case, it is not permissible for her to get married without a wali.

See also question no. 7989

And Allaah knows best.

To synopse, parents cannot force a daughter to marry someone she doesn't want to, and sons are permitted to pick their own wife and marry even if the parents dissaprove. (of course the partner must be acceptable in Islam)

 

[al-muslimah]

To synopse, parents cannot force a daughter to marry someone she doesn't want to, and sons are permitted to pick their own wife and marry even if the parents dissaprove. (of course the partner must be acceptable in Islam)

jazaki allah khayran

 

[zulfikar]

:salam2:Well here is the deal i wanted to ask you guys something,i was going to get married this year, but somehow it did not work out in the end because of the parents....i have lost the only person that i ever loved more than myself and anything else it was a huge drama for both of us, we knew each other since childhood ....However, Am still in school and working at the same time.alhamdulillah am doing good financially as well even though am still studying and living far away from my family ...etc .I still can provide thanks to my arms as well.

Is it allowed to marry a non Muslim women that i know until i finish my school?Because i have a friend of mine that would be fine with it,in fact she asked me if we could be together i said that it wasn t allowed in Islam for me to live with a woman unless married, so now she said that we should marry then.However i don t know if it is technically allowed in Islam.

Folks am going koukou i can not wait other two years to get married by telling some parents that i have a gold mine a bunch of hotels and 100 cows somewhere in the country side.
Eventough she is nice and pretty i just wanna marry her for a certain period of time and i would tell her that from the start, until am fully ready to marry a Muslim girl.Is this allowed or is it considered mutaa? eventough it is for a longer period maybe two to three years....

Advices appreciated any legal approach with references even more.




wassalaam
jameel

I am sorry for my late answer, because i had business so i am not often open this side for a while. in shiite, we allowed to have mutaa, (temporary wedding) especilly with non muslim girl. BUT in shiite we couldn't get mutaa with every girls. we could get mutaa only with three kind of`women which are christians, jews, muslim women or girls. we cannot marry with Hindus, Budha, Kong fu cianisme women or others religions.

you have i right decision. because we are forbidden to get permanent married with women except muslim women. WE ONLY COULD HAVE PERMANENT MARRIED WITH OUR MUSLIM SISTERS

Mutaa is hard to do so. women decides all of the clause in the contractual of mutaa, including number of money that you should pay to her. Commonly women ask a very huge number of`money for mutaa. and Women decides what kind of marry relationship between you and her. Is that allowed for you to have sex with him or you just companying her in the one place (home).

 

[IbnAdam77]

Hello brother!

I think you need to think again about your answer above!
You were right about it being allowed to marry the ahlil kitab but Inm my opinion and many of the imams and mujtahedin fil din you should marry someone eventhough for a short period of time as long as you accept and pay all the womans right!!!

So do you advise our brother to either go and marry the lady he mentioned above for good and hope for the best without even knowing her enough to start his life together with her

Or

Just be together without any marriage and out of Islamic law which Im sure neither way are recommended by whoever has a little knowledge about Islam and Allah and ofcourse human right (ISLAMIC WAY AND NOT WESTER WAY)

Please reply to me if Im wrong so me and everyone else who dont know as good as you know aswell and may Allah bless us with some knowledge just like you and all our brothers and sisters who work hard to make Islam as pleasant as it should be and has been.

Wan min allah toufiq

:salam2: dear sister mariami

first of all, i am very sorry for the very late reply...just now i saw it...

i didnt say the brother what to do in my answer...according to the ulama, it is permissible to marry a non-muslim woman...however, it is not appreciated by them...

i have tried to be straight on the point...i did not say to marry the non-muslim woman blindly...rather, i said what islam says about it...i did hope my other brothers and sisters will help that brother more...

as per your other question (or statment ishould say?), I am not a person who makes islam easier than what ALLAH (swt) and HIS messenger made it, inventing my own ways and rejecting what I wish to reject...it is very clear that a muslim man and woman also cannot be alone without a mahram...so how can i say to be alone with a non-muslim woman withiut marriage?...I guess you have taken your own meanings from my post sister...its not my intention to confuse my brothers and sisters but to mention al-haqq...so I am very sory if you are confused...read it again please...furthermore, i hope the following link will help you a little...

http://www.turntoislam.com/forum/showthread.php?t=19463&highlight=marrying+non-muslim

hope I made it very clear and if any brother or sister is offended by this, I am very sorry...

wassalam

-brother IbnAdam-

 

[al-muslimah]

I am sorry for my late answer, because i had business so i am not often open this side for a while. in shiite, we allowed to have mutaa, (temporary wedding) especilly with non muslim girl. BUT in shiite we couldn't get mutaa with every girls. we could get mutaa only with three kind of`women which are christians, jews, muslim women or girls. we cannot marry with Hindus, Budha, Kong fu cianisme women or others religions.

you have i right decision. because we are forbidden to get permanent married with women except muslim women. WE ONLY COULD HAVE PERMANENT MARRIED WITH OUR MUSLIM SISTERS

Mutaa is hard to do so. women decides all of the clause in the contractual of mutaa, including number of money that you should pay to her. Commonly women ask a very huge number of`money for mutaa. and Women decides what kind of marry relationship between you and her. Is that allowed for you to have sex with him or you just companying her in the one place (home).

akhi thats a shia' point of view!!..we are not here in this website to listen to such fatwa!! we do what our prophet mohamad saw used to do and we follow his sunna and hadeeth

 

[IbnAdam77]

akhi thats a shia' point of view!!..we are not here in this website to listen to such fatwa!! we do what our prophet mohamad saw used to do and we follow his sunna and hadeeth

:salam2:

100% agree with the sister al-muslimah...brother I respect you but that is not the way Islam deal with it...

bytheway, my advice to brother Jameel is to do Salatul Istikhaara as mentioned by sister palastine...is is a very clear issue...

wassalam

-brother IbnAdam-