life really sucks....:(

[AmeliaJohnson]

:salam2:
I hope all members nd non members are in best of health. I know i havnt been on this website for a looong time...but there wasnt any time to leave a thread that i was going away. You see after that arranged marrige scene...my mom took me over to their house (the guy's house) to spend some time there. All i could do was protest....
Well sadly i say that i did all u advised me to do. I broke things throwed tantrums...told her i'll call the cops. But she said this is legal....i said where is ur proof of it? She called our lawyer and then told me that she was in debt from the guy's father...she couldnt pay them back the money so when i was young they made a deal that i would be married with his son and the debt be payed. My mom agreed and there were 4 lawyers present at the scene. They all signed it....so this is not illegel...
What could i say to all this. Well i spent time there.... And life is hard there. I mean how could i pray there?? i was away from tti and my muslim friends...no one to ask advise from...
The wedding is on my 17th birthday......
dont know where to go and what to do...........

lost girl in the cruel world....
Amina

 

[~Ali_]

Walaikumasalam - did you verify this lawyer and signed document business? It all sounds abit too... odd and illegal. I mean how can you settle a debt with human lives.. it all sounds abit like human trafficking to me

My best advice would be - go and grab a lawyer of your own sis.
... Its like.. how can you marry someone against their will no matter whos debt it is - it just doesnt make sense...and what kind of stupid law is that (if it is a law).

Remember your strongest weapon - dua.

Do these people know you are a muslim?
Does the guy your getting married to even care about you?? or is he forced into this matter also? If he doesnt like it.. then you guys should team up and knock on some lawyers office and annoy the goosebumps out of him to help you guys out.

Or ... if things are going from bad to worse - and your last resort could be something.. rather 'hollywood-like' be the worst person ever and hope they dont like you

no.. thats just bad advice.. um.. perhaps you could tell them that you are muslim as last resort (if you havnt alrdy) and influence them via your good character ... and hey who knows.. they all might become muslim???

All this stuff...is just pure madness.... makes my blood boil... if I was there and im pretty sure all of us are thinking this too - you would be outta there in a jiffy and we would make sure that this absurdity gets taken care of.

 

[safiya58]

:salam2:

you are in a difficult situation sister. but do not loose hope in Allah. there is a solution 4 everything inshaallah. in Islam it is not premissible to be married involuntarily. trust in Allah and He will show you a way out inshaallah.

God Answers the Prayers of His Servants when they pray like they should.

[2:186] When My servants ask you about Me, I am always near. I answer their prayers when they pray to Me. The people shall respond to Me and believe in Me, in order to be guided.

Wish you all the best inshaallah

 

[AmeliaJohnson]

brother ~Ali yeah she did show me the signed papers...and how can i get a lawyer??im only 15!...well about the guy liking me yeah i think he is interested...in a bad sense ...
He is already..ready for the wedding thing...So ..i guess im the only one against it. I dont know what will happen if i told them all i am muslim...i guess its the time i told them, pray all of u that everything goes fine....

thnx anyways for the advise bro...Allah Bless you and keep you happy always..Amin..


Amina

 

[q8penpals]

Salam

These people are all LYING to you! Your profile shows you live in the US - it is ILLEGAL to "sell" people in the US! It is called SLAVERY to buy and sell people! There is NO SUCH THING as a legal agreement to arrange a marriage to re-pay a debt!!!

Get yourself to a women's shelter and ask for advice for getting help! You NEED to get a lawyer (you are underage - try contacting the child protective services) to protect you! You need to get away from people who are lying to you and deceiving you and forcing you into a marriage you do not want!

You are under 18 - it can be considered child abuse to force you into marriage - get the child protective services - if you can't find them, go to a police station and (calmly) explain the situation and tell them you need help NOW from the protective services. (Don't go crazy with the police or they will just think you are maybe a kid who is mad at the parents and trying to make trouble - just calmly state the facts as you know them and ask them where you can go to get help).

May Allah watch over, guide, and protect you!

 

[AmeliaJohnson]

Sis is it really illlegel???!!! Well ok im soooooo glad told me that. I didnt know...well now i do...I'll do exactly as u say. Thnk u thnk uuuuuuuu!!

take care..
Amina

 

[~Ali_]

Ahoy! I knew it sounded odd and fishy- all the best sister!

 

[a_muslimah86]

You can rest *assured* it's 500% illegal..not just 100%!!!

Your mother cannot do that!!!..if *she* has debt *she* has to pay it..she can't put you through the trouble of it..or worst yet make you part of its solution..like she's trying to do

Sister q8penpals gave you good directions about what to do..take them seriously..note them down on a paper and hide it well in your room or something..and *do* them as soon as you possibly can!

Your mom is doing something that can make her end up being a *headline* on CNN Headline News!!!..it's *that* serious!

I live in the U.S. like you do..and there's NO LAW allowing something of the sort to take place even if you're 18-years-old..if YOU don't want to get married..NO ONE can make you!..and certainly NO ONE can make a *debt payment* out of *you*..you're not living in a jungle in the depths of the Amazon...there are laws to protect you..so *know them* and take advantage of *their protection* dear sister!

May Allah Guard you and Bless you!!!..Ameen!

P.S. Please keep us updated about your situation as much as you can!

 

[a_muslimah86]

I forgot to ask you sister...has school started already in your state?

If it has..you should meet up with a school counselor and speak to him/her about the situation..if you feel that speaking to the cops might backfire or make you scared..I am sure a counselor can take care of the issue very quickly and effectively!

Sorry for the 2nd reply sister..but I'm REALLY concerned over your well-being!

 

[IbnAdam77]

:salam2:
I hope all members nd non members are in best of health. I know i havnt been on this website for a looong time...but there wasnt any time to leave a thread that i was going away. You see after that arranged marrige scene...my mom took me over to their house (the guy's house) to spend some time there. All i could do was protest....
Well sadly i say that i did all u advised me to do. I broke things throwed tantrums...told her i'll call the cops. But she said this is legal....i said where is ur proof of it? She called our lawyer and then told me that she was in debt from the guy's father...she couldnt pay them back the money so when i was young they made a deal that i would be married with his son and the debt be payed. My mom agreed and there were 4 lawyers present at the scene. They all signed it....so this is not illegel...
What could i say to all this. Well i spent time there.... And life is hard there. I mean how could i pray there?? i was away from tti and my muslim friends...no one to ask advise from...
The wedding is on my 17th birthday......
dont know where to go and what to do...........

lost girl in the cruel world....
Amina

wa'alaikumussalam warahmatullahi wabarakatuh sister Aminah

La Hawlawala Quwwata Illa Billah

O my dear sister! I can feel how hard it will be, for a 16+ old Muslimah to be in a situation like that. What we all need to understand is that this is the reality of this world. We (those who are under the umbrella of Islam) should always make Allah (subuhaanahu wata'aala) the dearest to us. He is The Oft-Forgiving, The Most Merciful.

The true fear in Allah (subuhaanahu wata'aala) is something which will surely lead us to success. NEVER lose HOPE in Allah (subuhaanahu wata'aala) my sister. Keep asking Allah (subuhaanahu wata'aala) to solve this problem for you. Surely He will accept the sincere Du'as of His servants. Please try to do as much Du'a as you can, especially in the 3rd part of the night, after Tahajjud Prayer. Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: Our Lord (glorified and exalted be He) descends each night to the earth's sky when there remains the final third of the night, and He says: "Who is saying a prayer to Me that I may answer it? Who is asking something of Me that I may give it him? Who is asking forgiveness of Me that I may forgive him?" (al-Bukhari also by Muslim, Malik, at-Tirmidhi and Abu Dawud).

Cry in front of your Lord when you are alone my dear sister. Indeed that will make our hearts pure and get closer to Allah (subuhaanahu wata'aala). The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said,

“There are two eyes that the Fire will not touch: eyes that wept in fear of Allah, and eyes that stayed up guarding in the way of Allah.” [Tirmidhi]

And he also mentioned (peace and blessings be upon him) seven people whom Allah will shade in His shade, on a Day when there is no other shade, and included among them,

“...and a person who remembered Allah when alone until their eyes flowed with tears.” [Bukhari and Muslim]


Even if the whole world left us alone, we will not be. Allah (subuhaanahu wata'aala) is there for His servants. He is Al-Hayy (The Ever Living).

Keep utmost trust in NONE BUT ALLAH sister. Our family may leave us and our friends and relatives may leave us. But Allah (subuhaanahu wata'aala) will NEVER leave us if we seek help from Him.

He is Allah, the Lord of the worlds, who saved Ibrahim ('alaihissalam) from the flames of fire of Namrood (the king on that time who ruled over the world at that time), who saved Moosa ('alaihissalam) from the torture of Fi'awn, who saved Younus ('alaihissalam) from the belly of big Fish, who saved Yousuf ('alaihissalam) from the well and made him powerful in Egypt, who saved people of Cave from the torture of Rome Empire..........etc etc.

He is the same Allah who has power over all His creations. Let us all ask for His help in the times of Difficulties.

InshaAllah I will keep you in my Du'as sister. Never lose hope. He will show us ways to solve the problems we have. But with one condition. We should have utmost trust and hope, and believe none can help us except Him, the Lord of worlds.

Hope this helped you a little my dear sister.

wassalam 'alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh

 

[IbnAdam77]

Sorry. Just now I knew you are only 15+.

MashaAllah there are very good advices given by all. Always try to be neutral.

 

[a_stranger]

:salam2:
Dear young sister:

Don`t worry continue to pray ....and pray with a heart knowing that Allah swt our creator is hearing you , Try to pray some riqaats(prayer) before dawn and ask Allah with love and humbleness feeling that you are his slave ......I am sure everything will be OK. I pray that Allah give us all more faith and grant you a good muslem husband .

 

[fatima1994]

:salam2:
Sis Amina! hope ur fine. YES this IS ILLEGEL!!! Go to the cops at once! i agree with @q8penpals.... In the end just keep faith in Allah and make regular dua's ...Inshallah all will be fine.

take care!!!

 

[ummyasiin]

salaams, inshallah I am not to late, sister I only live 2states away from you which is only about 2-3hrs away!!!!!! this is absolutely ILLIGEL. call child protective services, thru the payphone at a 1 800 number, or look online for "human trafficking" and get outa this situation, I know you are young and your traveling is limited, so you have to tell your local police, otherwise, I would invite you here with me and my family, and Allah knows best. May Allah grant you ease....Ameen

 

[IHearIslam]

Assalamu Alaikum my sweet sister Amina
maann...life does suck!!! but you have Allah, and as the other brothers and sisters said....it's ILLEGAL for sure!!! so you can get ouuttta there.....inshaAllah.
I'll always keep you in my duas, you'll be fine as long as you have Allah by your side, you NEVER ALONE!!!
keep us updated inshaAllah!!!
love u lottss!

 

[zbhotto]

Serious

Isn't there any muslim nearby to the place of this sister? Sister why don't you go the imam of the mosque or the committee of the mosque and ask for help. There must be some service the mashjid (mosque) provided by local muslim community. There must be some trustworthy person. Ask help from them. Why don't you look for muslim in your community for marriage? Pray to ALLAH (SWT) for help. Inshallah He swt will help you. Do something, don't stay silent.

 

[massi]

Assalam Alaikom
May Allaah make things easy for you ...Ameen
I just want to remark that if you are a muslima and your husband is not muslim so the marriage is invalid and it'll be concern as an adultery !!!

 

[AZAM_SIDDIQUI]

how much impact hollywood has..
ur moher is entangling u in a hollywood movie like plot and some brothers r offering hollywood advice like behavebadly and all-lol-life is not hollywood.

just remember they plot and Allah plans and Allah is the best of planners.

as u will realize as u grow up in age and islam how weak and feeble and stupid is the planning of those who disbelieve.

 

[ShyHijabi]

As I advised you twice before, contact the authorities. Call CPS and explain your situation, this had gone beyond ridiculous. I don't even understand why these "Christians" are agreeing to an arranged marriage, they don't practice arranged marriage. Sister this seems frankly unbelievable in the US, a mother "arranging" her daughters marriage when she herself is a proclaimed atheist.

Call the authorities, NOW! I don't know how much worse this situation has to become for you to do the intelligent thing.

 

[GAZIJA]

Assalamu alaikum,

sister you have to notify Human services of your state. Call them and tell them your situation and I am sure they will come by and take you away. In this country that would be called "abuse" and since you are only 15 then you have good chance to get away. Visit this website; http://www.hsdcfs.utah.gov/ and look for the one in your state.
Call them up and tell them your situation or even better call Police and they will be automatically involved in your case.

wasalam

p.s. read this paper; http://www.scribd.com/doc/2302255/DCFS-and-Your-Rights

http://www.nyc.gov/html/hra/html/home/home.shtml

http://www.nyc.gov/portal/site/nycgov/menuitem.743f4d965e39ade6a62fa24601c789a0/