Lets share Appropriate jokes

slaveofAllah88

slaveofAllah88

Slave of Allah (swt)
:salam2:

lets all share jokes im really bored lol :) just for laughs
make it appropriate

and please dont take any offence :) just joke
as Ahmed Deedat said, everyone can laugh at other a great person is the one that can laugh at themselves too cuz sometimes the joke is on us ;)

hehe :)

:):):):):) LOTS OF SMILES :):):):):)


hehe i thought this was funny
engrish-funny-laboretory-imad.jpg
 
K

Kakorot

Junior Member
:wasalam:

what is a fish's worse day?

answer: friday

why did the cookie go to the doctors?

answer: because it was feeling crummy.

:blackhijab: 'knock knock'

:hijabi: who's there?

:blackhijab: Boo!

:hijabi: Boo who?

:blackhijab: Oh sorry sister, I didn't mean to make you cry!
 
slaveofAllah88

slaveofAllah88

Slave of Allah (swt)
aslam o alikum :)
here is some

Dr. Smith recently got his doctorate in psychology and his first assignment was to visit the community loony bin retirement home for the patient’s monthly mental examination.

He sees his first patient and asks him, “Ralph, how much is six times six?” Ralph responds “74.” He asks the next resident, “Tim, how much is six times six?” Tom responds, “Thursday.” Expecting more of the same, he approaches Randy and asks him, “Randy, how much is six times?” “THIRTY-SIX” replies Randy. “That’s right Randy, well done! Now tell me how did you know that answer?” “Oh it was easy… I just subtracted 74 from Thursday!”


----------------------------------------------------------------------
 
K

Kakorot

Junior Member
how much did the psychiatrist charge the elephant?

answer: £100 for the consultation... £500 for a new couch :redface:
 
slaveofAllah88

slaveofAllah88

Slave of Allah (swt)
Q: What do you get when 100 rabbits stand in a row and 99 take a step back?

A: A receding hare line

----------------------------------------------
Why did the rooster cross the basketball court?
It heard that the referee was blowing fouls

------------------------------------------------
I hope I'm not poisonous, says the first snake.

"Why?" asks the second snake.

"Because I just bit my lip.
 
Muslimah16

Muslimah16

ServantOfAllah*
For all the sisters who think anything and everything is cute. :hijabi:

Question: What do you call a cute volcano?
Answer: Lava-ble

I am not really good with jokes akhi, hope this is ok enough. :)
BTW... kool thread mashaAllah.

Wassalaam~
 
slaveofAllah88

slaveofAllah88

Slave of Allah (swt)
Q: What did the elephant say when it saw a dead ant?

A: DEAD ANT, DEAD ANT, DEAD ANT.

Q: What did the elephant say when it saw a live ant?

A: It stepped on the ant and then said, "DEAD ANT, DEAD ANT
 
K

Kakorot

Junior Member
i got this joke from elsewhere..

Talking animals?

While riding one day, a cowboy met an Indian riding along with a dog and a sheep and he began a conversation. Cowboy: "Hey, nice dog you got there. Mind if I speak to him?"
Indian: "Dog no talk."

Cowboy: "Hey dog, how's it going?" :)

Dog: "Doin' alright." :SMILY149:

Indian: ( Look of shock ) :eek:

Cowboy:"Is this Indian your owner?" ( Pointing at the Indian ) :SMILY231:

Dog: "Yep." :SMILY126:

Cowboy: "How does he treat you?" :confused:

Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food, and takes me to the lake once a week to play." :jumpclap:

Indian: ( Look of disbelief ) :eek:

Cowboy: "Mind if I talk to your horse?" :)

Indian: "Horse no talk." :SMILY335:

Cowboy: "Hey horse, how's it going?" :)

Horse: "Good." :p

Indian: ( Extreme look of shock ) :eek:

Cowboy: "Is this your owner?" ( Pointing at the Indian ) :)

Horse: "Yep." :SMILY126:

Cowboy: "How does he treat you?" :confused:

Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often, and keeps me in a shed to protect me." :wavyarms:

Indian: ( Complete look of utter amazement ) :D

Cowboy: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?" :)

Indian: "Sheep liar." :SMILY286:
 
Al-Kashmiri

Al-Kashmiri

Well-Known Member
Staff member
shaheerpak said:
:salam2:

lets all share jokes im really bored lol :) just for laughs
make it appropriate

and please dont take any offence :) just joke
as Ahmed Deedat said, everyone can laugh at other a great person is the one that can laugh at themselves too cuz sometimes the joke is on us ;)

hehe :)

:):):):):) LOTS OF SMILES :):):):):)


hehe i thought this was funny
engrish-funny-laboretory-imad.jpg
Click to expand...

As-salaamu `alaykum.

That is what you call bad choice of words, combined with bad spelling. What's funny is comparing it to what the `Arabic says! It sounds like they are trying to sound sophisticated lol!

The receding hare line is my personal favourite so far lol.
 
slaveofAllah88

slaveofAllah88

Slave of Allah (swt)
Al-Kashmiri said:
As-salaamu `alaykum.

That is what you call bad choice of words, combined with bad spelling. What's funny is comparing it to what the `Arabic says! It sounds like they are trying to sound sophisticated lol!

The receding hare line is my personal favourite so far lol.
Click to expand...

:salam2:
:) i didn't get the arabic part but the english spelling and grammer was hilarious lol
 
B

BigAk

Junior Member
Brother Shaheer.... That photo you posted is from my country Syria ... hahahah.. here's another:

.
 

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allah is with me

allah is with me

Rabana Wa laqal Hamd
shaheerpak said:
Q: What did the elephant say when it saw a dead ant?

A: DEAD ANT, DEAD ANT, DEAD ANT.

Q: What did the elephant say when it saw a live ant?

A: It stepped on the ant and then said, "DEAD ANT, DEAD ANT
Click to expand...

OH! WHY DID HE SAY ' DEAD ANT, DEAD ANT' when he was a live...
 
Hard Rock Moslem

Hard Rock Moslem

I'm your brother
A tourist guide unfortunately was assigned a japanese couples who can't speak english and the guide can't speak japanese.

Tourists: "Ohayo-sama" (good morning)!!

Guide: "Oh no!! I don't understand!!"

Tourists: "Ohayo-sama"!! They repeated while bowing their head.

He paused for few seconds and thought they must be asking what is his name. So his said:

Guide: "Hi, I'm Ganda. Nice meeting you. I'm your guide. I will take you around".

Tourists: "ganda?!!"

Guide: Yes, Ganda. Smiling.

The next morning again the guide went to the hotel to pick-up them. This time he wanted to know what is their name, so he asked:

Guide: "Ohayo-sama"?

The couples looked at each other and answered while bowing their head "Ganda, ganda"

Guide: er????


NOTE: THE ABOVE JOKE JUST A FICTION, NOTHING DOING WITH ANYONE.
 
abu'muhammad

abu'muhammad

Junior Member
:salam2:



Father – advising to his son for exam,
write your paper neat and clean, be quick ! write fast ! check your answers again ! take as many supplementaries to write. Look at clock !........................
Son says after hearing long – you are better than me papa, for the exam!

One child to other - what disease happen when many bees stink on leg ?
Other child – I don’t know but ‘It’s elephantiasis later’.

Father was prompting his son to eat apples. Father – my son eat those slices of apples . It has lot Iron .. good for health, than strong man… Hhnnn
Son brought the hammer – what to do with this ! then , papa ?

After a whole day at zoo, the family is returning back. Father asks daughter – what you liked in the zoo ?
Daughter – icecreams and sandwiches

At the zoo, the lion came out accidentally from the cage. One man is making noise hoo, ha, hoo hoo , iya…. ! Zoo keepers came running. Saw man was inside who locked the cage and lion loitering outside.

The tourist guide brought people on the beautiful mountain and said,
what your views coming here to such a beautiful place?
An afraid tourist says : I will keep my eyes open !


Wife to her husband - I made saving of rupees 5000 buy purchasing things at discount. It was wonderful shopping ! see the bill.
Husband says – good ! very nice. where’s the money.
Wife – there were also some beautiful jewelleries and I bought with that.

two footballers are talking before the match.
First – I will make a goal today for sure.
second- but If you cannot make then ?
First – I ‘ll make own goal then !

Teacher asked a question : where most washermen live?
Student : It’s Washington. Is it ?!
 
fada_all

fada_all

Junior Member
a man go to a very expensive restaurant where he find the candel se says to himself :this is seems to be a very cheap one because they don't have the electricity......... he took a set and called for the servant and told him : 'i have 5 dollars what do you suggest for me to take " the servant was astonished and anserwed him : i suggest to go to another restaurant!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i hope it is undrestood!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
K

Kakorot

Junior Member
a story of four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody.

There was an important job to be done and Everybody was asked to do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that, because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. Consequently, it wound up that Nobody told Anybody, so Everybody blamed Somebody.
 
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