Non-Muslim seeks guidance

[Clueless]

Hello my friends,

I am well aware marriage between a non-Muslim guy and a Muslim girl is strictly Haram, or forbidden. However, I find myself in this kind of situation. I have met this wonderful Muslim girl and have given up pork for over a year now, and I never enjoyed alcohol to begin with. I have no desire to return to these things. I have looked into Islam and have looked into becoming Muslim for our sake. I grew up with christian parents but was never baptized, and am chaste at the age of 21. However, Prophet Muhammad (may Allah honour him and grant him peace) has enjoined us to believe in five articles of faith, one of which is the belief of life after death. I can't simply believe that there is "life" after death, but I can't believe that death is the absolute end either. I'm not even sure if her parents, or relatives would even be happy even if I did become Muslim...

If Allah is all knowing, all wise, surely there is some sort of solution to please both her and her parents.

 

[ditta]

Hello and welcome to the forum.

After reading your post I thought, hmm, this is bit of a pickle. Do you firmly believe that there is no god worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) is the Final Messenger of Allah? Please do not allow your emotion with this Muslim lady to influence your belief regarding whether you affirm or reject the above testimony of faith. I say this because accepting Islam for marriage or any other reason shows a lack of completeness/full submission to the testimony (i.e., being Muslim because one affirms without doubt that there is only One God and Muhammad is His Messenger).

Regarding what happens after death then this links with one’s full submission in believing in what Allah revealed to the Prophet Muhammad with, the Qur’aan and his Sunnah. This is because when one fully believes that what the Qur’aan and Sunnah (the Prophet is the best example for us to follow) of the Prophet state is the truth, and then it reinforces our belief, in this instance, life after death.

Therefore a Muslim affirms what happens after death because Allah the Almighty has told us in the Qur’aan and the Prophet Muhammad has informed us of certain points. I suggest you refer to this thread titled ‘Death and the Grave’ which shows what the Qur’aan and Sunnah say regarding this.

http://www.turntoislam.com/forum/showthread.php?t=54305

This is the minor resurrection as outlined in the above linked thread. Belief in the actual Day of Resurrection is similar (i.e., the extensive proofs regarding this in the Qur’aan and Sunnah). If I have a chance I will try to post some unless another brother or sister posts such proofs.

The blunt truth is that you need examine deeply to what certainty you affirm what Allah has said in the Qur’aan and the Sunnah of the Prophet because otherwise if one is sure that it is the truth then there can be no doubt regarding life after death (because of what Allah has said regarding it in the Qur'aan and what the Prophet has informed us of).

The portion below is taken from here:

Denying the resurrection after death or doubting that it will happen is kufr which puts one beyond the pale of Islam according to scholarly consensus, because of the sound and clear evidence in the Qur'aan and Sunnah which speaks of the resurrection. Rather common sense and sound human nature also point to that.

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“The disbelievers pretend that they will never be resurrected (for the Account). Say (O Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم): Yes! By my Lord, you will certainly be resurrected, then you will be informed of (and recompensed for) what you did; and that is easy for Allaah”

[al-Taghaabun 64:7]

“And indeed We created man (Adam) out of an extract of clay (water and earth).

Thereafter We made him (the offspring of Adam) as a Nutfah (mixed drops of the male and female sexual discharge and lodged it) in a safe lodging (womb of the woman).

Then We made the Nutfah into a clot (a piece of thick coagulated blood), then We made the clot into a little lump of flesh, then We made out of that little lump of flesh bones, then We clothed the bones with flesh, and then We brought it forth as another creation. So Blessed is Allaah, the Best of creators.

After that, surely, you will die.

Then (again), surely, you will be resurrected on the Day of Resurrection”

[al-Mu’minoon 23:12-16]

“And the Trumpet will be blown (i.e. the second blowing) and behold from the graves they will come out quickly to their Lord.

They will say: ‘Woe to us! Who has raised us up from our place of sleep.’ (It will be said to them): ‘This is what the Most Gracious (Allaah) had promised, and the Messengers spoke truth’”

[Yaa-Seen 36:51-52]

“And he puts forth for Us a parable, and forgets his own creation. He says: ‘Who will give life to these bones after they are rotten and have become dust?’

Say: (O Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم) ‘He will give life to them Who created them for the first time! And He is the All‑Knower of every creation!’”

[Yaa-Seen 36:78-79]

And there are many other verses which speak of the resurrection and requital, followed by Paradise or Hell. And there are mutawaatir ahaadeeth which tell of how people will rise from their graves and be assembled in the place of gathering, and they will stand, barefoot, naked and uncircumcised, and the sun will be brought close to their heads, and there will be the reckoning and requital, and admittance to Paradise or Hell.

These are things which no Muslim has any excuse for not knowing; rather even non-Muslims such as Jews and Christians know them, so the one who denies them is undoubtedly a kaafir.

What you must do is explain to her how Allaah will honour those who obey Him, and will make the reckoning easy for them and admit them to His Paradise and the abode of His honour, and tell her about the punishment and humiliation that He has prepared for those who disobey Him and go against Him, and their miserable state at the time of death, in the grave and on the Day of Resurrection.

Tell her of Allaah’s perfect justice, wisdom and mercy, and that it is not befitting for Him to leave mankind with no resurrection or reckoning:

“ ‘Did you think that We had created you in play (without any purpose), and that you would not be brought back to Us?’

So Exalted be Allaah, the True King: Laa ilaaha illa Huwa (none has the right to be worshipped but He), the Lord of the Supreme Throne!

And whoever invokes (or worships), besides Allaah, any other ilaah (god), of whom he has no proof; then his reckoning is only with his Lord. Surely, Al‑Kaafiroon (the disbelievers in Allaah and in the Oneness of Allaah, polytheists, pagans, idolaters) will not be successful.

And say (O Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم): ‘My Lord! Forgive and have mercy, for You are the Best of those who show mercy!’”

[al-Mu’minoon 23:115-118]

And it is not befitting for Him ultimately to treat believers and disbelievers, righteous and evildoers, equally.

“Shall We treat those who believe (in the Oneness of Allaah __ Islamic Monotheism) and do righteous good deeds as Mufsidoon (those who associate partners in worship with Allaah and commit crimes) on earth? Or shall We treat the Muttaqoon (the pious) as the Fujjaar (criminals, disbelievers, the wicked)?”

[Saad 38:28]

“Or do those who earn evil deeds think that We shall hold them equal with those who believe (in the Oneness of Allaah __ Islamic Monotheism) and do righteous good deeds, in their present life and after their death? Worst is the judgement that they make”

[al-Jaathiyah 45:21]

 

[A-believer-25]

One has to accept Islam sincerely for the sake of Allah (SWT), not for the sake of marriage or for any other reason. If one accepts Islam for marriage or other wordly things, then it's not acceptable.

There are 6 pillars of faith a Muslim has to accept.

"Faith in the sense of belief is based on six principles, which are mentioned in the hadeeth of Jibreel (peace be upon him), when he questioned the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), who said: “Faith means to believe in Allaah, His angels, His Books, His Messengers, the Last Day, and the Divine Decree, both good and bad.” (Agreed upon).

Faith which includes good deeds of various kinds is that which has seventy-odd branches. Hence Allaah called prayer eemaan in the aayah (interpretation of the meaning):

“And Allaah would never make your faith [eemaan] (prayers) to be lost (i.e. your prayers offered towards Jerusalem). Truly, Allaah is full of kindness, the Most Merciful towards mankind” [al-Baqarah 2:143]

The mufassireen said: “your faith (eemaan)” means your prayers towards Bayt al-Maqdis (Jerusalem), because the Sahaabah used to pray towards al-Masjid al-Aqsaa before they were commanded to face the Ka’bah in their prayers."


source:

http://www.islam-qa.com/en/ref/10839/pillars of faith

Also, there are many proofs that Islam is the truth! Here is a series call "Proof that Islam is the truth":

http://www.youtube.com/view_play_li...971778&p=7F4B62A190046A64&src_vid=vTcEeBDgEc8

The rest of the episodes are on the side.

If you have more questions post them, inshallah.

May Allah (SWT) guide you, ameen!

 

[saifkhan]

Hello my friends,

I am well aware marriage between a non-Muslim guy and a Muslim girl is strictly Haram, or forbidden. However, I find myself in this kind of situation. I have met this wonderful Muslim girl and have given up pork for over a year now, and I never enjoyed alcohol to begin with. I have no desire to return to these things. I have looked into Islam and have looked into becoming Muslim for our sake. I grew up with christian parents but was never baptized, and am chaste at the age of 21. However, Prophet Muhammad (may Allah honour him and grant him peace) has enjoined us to believe in five articles of faith, one of which is the belief of life after death. I can't simply believe that there is "life" after death, but I can't believe that death is the absolute end either. I'm not even sure if her parents, or relatives would even be happy even if I did become Muslim...

If Allah is all knowing, all wise, surely there is some sort of solution to please both her and her parents.

If you think that the dunya is a place of justice, then I have nothing to offer you.

but if you don't, then imagine, you are 21 yrs old, a very good boy, help the poor, needy, always tell truth, do not hurt anyone, give charity, respect parents,elders and kind to them, love the younger.

and another guy on the other side, the most criminal-some guy, alcoholic, murderer, rapist, drug addict and business, kill numerous ppl every day, child-poor-younger-older all are same to him. he treat them all badly.

now in the middle of the road, may be he killed you, may be brutally, but he lives a normal life span and dies a normal natural death.

if there is no Judgement day, no life after death, then you and him, must be the same.

so where is the benefit in being good like u and where is the harm in being bad like him?

may be one will say, people will know, so what? may be a false news claims that you were also involved with them and they killed u for internal clash?

and may be people forgot what that guy did.

this life is test for us, if we ponder we'll surely gonna understand.
but if we dont, where is the harm in seeking pleasure in the lap of a strange beautiful seductive woman with a glass of wine in the hand.

however this is just common logic, and that doesnt need that much effort to proof or even think that way.

why dont we open our eyes, why dont we think about these things?
why dont these matters become more important to us like other study, job, life?

Allah said in Al Quran chapter 21:30 Do the Unbelievers not see that the heavens and the earth were joined together, before We clove them asunder? We made every living thing from water. Will they not then believe?

dont we see, we see but we dont ponder,
we think, but when it doesnt go with modern days, we leave it, for the sake of whom? these modernism is not going to ensure us eternity, neither they have come up with an alternative solution and indeed they will not be able.

however

may Allah subhanahu wa ta'la give us the ability, maturity, understanding to understand His religion, his wisdom behind creating us and the universe

may He forgive us for our sins and may He lead us not go ashtray

 

[mosabaig]

Guidance

Dear friend,

Almighty Allah the one God has created everything and every situation and every emotion. His ways are bringing someone near him are also many, sometime we go seeking something and we find our God.
Prophet Moses when returning back to Egypt with his wife went towards a light and thought there is some fire let me get it to warm up my family in the cold of the desert night but found God speaking to him...........this is a long story.
So whatever is happening to you or me it is signs from God Almighty avail it and look into it whole heartedly, you will find everything a happy, purposeful and satisfying life and life after death we all are unaware but the man God made final prophet is of very high morals and characters so his words and God's final book QURAN we all should trust in matters of unknown and dont depend on our limited knowledge of just this world.. Because that world is different.
To me you sound like a very special person may Allah help you in all of your matters also.. Amen

 

[nyerekareem]

Please forgive me if I seem to be harsh, because I don't mean to be. The sister shouldn't even be dating!! Does her parents even know about this? Do they not care about honor?

Young man, you have to accept Islam because you believe, not because of a girl. Her dating you is haram, so every time she is with you, she is sinning. Consider her afterlife. I know you don't believe in an afterlife, but isn't better to die with some belief than none at all. Forgive me if I seem harsh.

 

[Clueless]

Please forgive me if I seem to be harsh, because I don't mean to be. The sister shouldn't even be dating!! Does her parents even know about this? Do they not care about honor?

Young man, you have to accept Islam because you believe, not because of a girl. Her dating you is haram, so every time she is with you, she is sinning. Consider her afterlife. I know you don't believe in an afterlife, but isn't better to die with some belief than none at all. Forgive me if I seem harsh.

I wouldn't say we've been dating at all... I had happened to bump into her and I believe she holds a special place in my heart, and I believe the opposite is true. We have strictly maintained a friendship only and I respect her a lot, and I truly don't wish to hurt her, but it seems inevitable. At most we have held hands and she has told me she wishes that something more could come from us. I respect her a lot and have so far tried my best to prevent her from doing anything forbidden... I'm not really sure what more I can do.

I understand that I myself have to accept Islam myself, and not because of a girl but I can't help but bring up the case of a Muslim man marrying a woman of the book. Would the Muslim man not inevitably be pushing Islam onto his wife due to the fact that his wife will heed his words out of love?

 

[umm aisha1]

May Allah ( one and Only God)open your heart and except the true(islam)

welcome to tti, i think is the first step that Allah show your muslim friend and now you joy us and ask ?. I hope you will ask more about islam every one here are very kind, trust me, we will help you.... if you have any ?. and i am sure efter u see the light in islam,you will love and understand you friend more.

the miracle is in the Holy quran .pppp read

 

[esperanza]

welcome to tti, i think is the first step that Allah show your muslim friend and now you joy us and ask ?. I hope you will ask more about islam every one here are very kind, trust me, we will help you.... if you have any ?. and i am sure efter u see the light in islam,you will love and understand you friend more.

the miracle is in the Holy quran .pppp read

i agree ..by taking this step and coming here you show respect for this girl and for islam...and i hope you will ask and learn andthings work out for you

 

[Aapa]

Assalaam walaikum,

I want to invite you to Islam.

You are on a major discovery in your life. Take time and see if this is really what you want. It is a life changing decision so take all the time you need.

I welcome you with love to TTI.

 

[strive-may-i]

Hello my friends,

I am well aware marriage between a non-Muslim guy and a Muslim girl is strictly Haram, or forbidden. However, I find myself in this kind of situation. I have met this wonderful Muslim girl and have given up pork for over a year now, and I never enjoyed alcohol to begin with. I have no desire to return to these things. I have looked into Islam and have looked into becoming Muslim for our sake. I grew up with christian parents but was never baptized, and am chaste at the age of 21. However, Prophet Muhammad (may Allah honour him and grant him peace) has enjoined us to believe in five articles of faith, one of which is the belief of life after death. I can't simply believe that there is "life" after death, but I can't believe that death is the absolute end either. I'm not even sure if her parents, or relatives would even be happy even if I did become Muslim...

If Allah is all knowing, all wise, surely there is some sort of solution to please both her and her parents.

Greetings Clueless.

Firstly, its worth appreciating, your coming here and asking a very serious question, about life and death while in a spell of so called 'love'. You need to step back and see, Whats that which prevents you from neither denying nor accepting life in hereafter. You are on a journey here on earth, and now you also seem to be on a discovery of Islam (Submission to will of God)

I guess its mostly to do with thinking that life is with birth on earth and ends with death. Or possibly Is the very fear of punishment in hereafter for the wrongs here, making you shy away from truth. Almighty clarifies and makes a distinction here. Soul is on a test here, and the reward is in hereafter, for the outcome of test here. The life on earth is nothing but a temporal journey. A severe test of ones faith and submission to will of Allah.

Since you seem to agree there indeed exists a creator, then its a matter of accepting his design, and reconciling with purpose of living on earth.

Most muslims are firm in their belief . Their actions might at times slip, but most are clear on the judgement day. Am sure this lady too is.

I have a big doubt on how you think you will please her, when she herself is more into pleasing the Almighty. And how, being one who wishes good for her, make her deviate away from a fundamental belief, that gives her peace of mind. If she is like any other soul, she will long for her partner to win in the here , so that the hereafter can also be victorious.

Its a matter of not just two lifes but two souls. Go slow. Heed the other responses here too.

Your second post, is indeed a serious question, and you seem to mean it. And feel free to ask your questions.

 

[a_stranger]

Allah subhanahu wa taala :the creator of all has different ways to call people to the straight path: islam . I think that you are a good person, that is why your creator is calling you.....i hope you don t turn your face, please listen to the call.

 

[Clueless]

I have a big doubt on how you think you will please her, when she herself is more into pleasing the Almighty. And how, being one who wishes good for her, make her deviate away from a fundamental belief, that gives her peace of mind. If she is like any other soul, she will long for her partner to win in the here , so that the hereafter can also be victorious

Sorry if I had sounded presumptuous. What I meant was to find a way that both respects her, and respects her parents.

My biggest dilemma as of now is whether I am looking into becoming Muslim for my own sake, or for her. I understand that I myself must wish to become Muslim myself, but I am not certain whether it's for myself or for her. Hopefully everything will become clear.

 

[a_stranger]

Islam is very clear and simple
http://www.islamic.org.uk/I4WM/teaching.htm