Tables Turned

Status
Not open for further replies.

Albint_Almuslima

Im Proud 2 B Me!
:salam2:

Ya noticed how the brothers in the site always have jokes to say on us Women, well lets turn the tables around this time!!LOL

The Silent Treatment
> >
> >
> > A man and his wife were having some problems at
> home and were giving each other the silent
> treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next
> day,he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM
> for an early morning business flight.
> >
> > Not wanting to be the first to break the silence
> (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please
> wake me at 5:00 AM " He left it where he knew she
> would find it.
> >
> > The next morning, the man woke up, only to
> discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his
> flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his
> wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of
> paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM ..
> Wake up."
> >
> > Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests
>
>
> >
> >
> WIFE VS. HUSBAND
> >
> >
> > A couple drove down a country road for several
> miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had
> led to an argument and neither of them wanted to
> concede their position.
> >
> > As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and
> pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of
> yours?"
> >
> > "Yep," the wife replied , " in-laws"
> >
> >
> >
>
WOMEN'S REVENGE
> >
> > "Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding
> items the woman wished to purchase.
> >
> > As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote
> control for a television set in her purse.
> > "So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked.
> > "No," she replied, " but my husband refused to
> come shopping with me,and I figured this was the
> most evil thing I could do to him legally."
> >

> > W O R D S

> >
> > A husband read an article to his wife about how
> many words women use a day. 30,000 to a man's
> 15,000.
> >
> > The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we
> have to repeat everything to men...
> >
> > The husband then turned to his wife and asked,
> "What?"
>


CREATION

A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be

so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.

" The wife responded, "Allow me to explain.


God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to

me;

God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!

WHO DOES WHAT

A man and his wife were having an argument about
who should brew the coffee each morning.

The wife said, "You should do it, because you get
up first,

and then we don't have to wait as long to get our
coffee."

The husband said, " You are in charge of cooking
around here and you should do it, because that is
your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."

Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides,
it is in the Bible that the man should do the

coffee."

Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me."
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New
Testament

and showed him at the top of several pages, that
it indeed says ..........."HEBREWS"


God may have created man before woman,
but there is always a rough draft before the
masterpiece.

SEND THIS TO SMART WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH AND TO
MEN YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT
 

rony

Junior Member
As-salam sister, it was really funny, specially the coffee brew. May Allah help you and protect you.
 

Bawar

Struggling2Surrender
after i read the last one:

"God may have created man before woman,
but there is always a rough draft before the
masterpiece."

and then looked in the mirror, I just couldn't stop laughing. so true hahahaha
 

justoneofmillion

Junior Member
assalam,thanks very funny thanks for sharing, so it`s muslim&feminist ! brothers we are in a real big trouble here Allah hafiz:) just kidding..lol
 

Sister_X

Junior Member
lol MashaAllah that was funny
here is more:

How are men and batteries different?
Batteries have a positive side.

How do we know men invented maps?
Who else would make an inch into a mile?

When does a man develop a brain?
The day he gets married.

What do you call a caring, considerate and gifted man?
A Myth.

How do you save a man from drowning?

Take your foot off his head

Men are like....Computers.
And a smart woman keeps a backup

Men are like.....High heels.
They're easy to walk on once you get the hang of it.

Husbands are like....Children
They're fine if they're someone else's.


If men got pregnant.... abortion would be available in convenience stores and drive-through windows.

There were 11 people hanging on to a rope that came down from a helicopter. Ten were men and one woman.

They all decided that one person should get off because if they didn't, the rope would break and everyone would die. No one could decide who should go. Finally the woman gave a really touching speech on how she would give up her life to save the others, because women were used to giving up things for their husbands and children and giving in to men.

All of the men started clapping.

With money a man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 dollar item she doesn't want.

In a bathroom a man has 6 items. A toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from Holiday Inn. A women has on average 337 items in her bathroom. A man would not be able to identify most of these Items.

In arguments a woman has the last word. Anything a man says after that is the beggining of a new argument.

Women love cats. Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking men kick cats.

A women worries about the future until she gets a husband. A husband doesn't worry about the future until he gets a wife.

A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, and read a book. A man will get dressed up for weddings and funerals.

A succsessful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful women is one who can find such a man.


Salaam
 

Abu Hannah

Slave of Allah
funny

Moderators, time to close this post :lol:

Just kidding ...... guys, we need to have comebacks for these.

Nice ones sister

:salam2:
 
lol MashaAllah that was funny
here is more:

How are men and batteries different?
Batteries have a positive side.

How do we know men invented maps?
Who else would make an inch into a mile?

When does a man develop a brain?
The day he gets married.

and etc..........

Salaam


ähmm sister in this post there is some dialouges which i think is not so much funny and a little bit ......

Anyway. jazakallah for your post
 
:salam2:

Ya noticed how the brothers in the site always have jokes to say on us Women, well lets turn the tables around this time!!LOL

The Silent Treatment
> >
> >
> > A man and his wife were having some problems at
> home and were giving each other the silent
> treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next
> day,he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM
> for an early morning business flight.
> >
> > Not wanting to be the first to break the silence
> (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please
> wake me at 5:00 AM " He left it where he knew she
> would find it.
> >
> > The next morning, the man woke up, only to
> discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his
> flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his
> wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of
> paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM ..
> Wake up."
> >
> > Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests
>
....
]


after a week i got something which bring me in laughing, really funny.
 

Libinette

Umm Zubayr
:SMILY335: These are really nice jokes....

the second sister, may have been just a little bit harsh on you men, but i'm sure she had good intentions and that's what counts..
 

justoneofmillion

Junior Member
:SMILY335: These are really nice jokes....

the second sister, may have been just a little bit harsh on you men, but i'm sure she had good intentions and that's what counts..
assalam.............................................................................................................
........................................................................................
........................................................................................
.....................................................................................
 

Libinette

Umm Zubayr
This thread is called: Tables turned...
the sisters didn't mean to be offensif, just a bit of fun and they stayed in the islamic 'borders', maybe the second sis went a bit far, but as i said i believe she had good intentions... :confused:
this is my opinion...
 

justoneofmillion

Junior Member
assalam,who said it was offensive sister libin? funny a little unislamic may be for the generale public however no big deal welcome to the west!

wassalam:)
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top