Backbiting

[Abdul-Raheem]

:salam2:

Major sins are indeed the cause for all misery, evil and torment in this world and the hereafter.

And the worst of all sins are those that are greatest in harm and danger to humanity. Among the destructive major sins are backbiting and slandering. These two sins are forbidden by Allah because they sow enmity, evils and discord among people and lead to destruction. They cause hostilities between people of the same household and between neighbors and relatives. They can decrease in good deeds and increase in evil ones and lead to dishonor and ignominy.

Backbiting and slandering are shame and disgrace. Their perpetrator is detested and he shall not have a noble death. Allah forbids these acts, as He says in the Qur'an:

"Backbiting and Gossiping are from the most vilest and despicable of things, yet the most widely spread amongst mankind, such that no one is free from it except for a few people."

Backbiting (gheebah) means mentioning something about a person (in his absence), that he hates (to have mentioned), whether it is about: His body, his religious characteristics, his worldly affairs, his self, his physical appearance, his character, his wealth, his child, his father, his wife, his manner of walking, his smile, it is the same whether you mention that about him with words, through writings, or whether you point or indicate him by gesturing with your eyes, hand or head.

As for the body, is when you make fun of how someone looks, or mentioning any bad quality in him, as saying: "he is blind", "he limps", "he is bleary-eyed", "he is bald", "he is short", "he is tall", "he is black", "he is yellow", "he's too thin", "he's too fat". As for his religious qualities, it is when you say: "he is a sinner", "he is a thief", "he is a betrayer", "he is an oppressor", "he doesn't pray", "he prays so fast", "he does not behave well towards his parents", "he does not pay the Zakat duly"." As for the worldly matters, then it is when you say: "he has poor manners", "he does not think that anyone has a right over him", "he talks too much" …etc

Allah says in the Qur'an:

"O you who believe! Avoid much suspicion, in deeds some suspicions are sins. And spy not neither backbite one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting). And fear Allah, verily, Allah is The One Who accepts repentance, Most Merciful" (Qur'an 49: 12)

In this verse, Allah strongly forbids backbiting, and he compares the backbiter to one who eats the flesh of his dead brother. If he would hate eating the flesh of his brother, he should also hate to eat his flesh while he is alive by backbiting and slandering him.

When one reflects deeply over this assimilation it will be enough to keep one away from backbiting.

Abu Hurayrah (May Allah be pleased with him) narrated that Prophet Mohammad (PBUH) said:

"Do you know what backbiting is?” They said, “Allah and His Messenger know best.” He then said, “It is to say something about your brother that he would dislike.” Someone asked him, “But what if what I say is true?” The Messenger of Allah said, “If what you say about him is true, you are backbiting him, but if it is not true then you have slandered him."

Backbiting is so widespread among people that it has become an issue of people’s meetings and an avenue for expressing their anger, misgivings and jealousy. Those who indulge in backbiting are hiding their own imperfections and harming others. They are oblivious of the fact that they are only harming themselves.

This is because the backbiter if the wrongdoer and his victim is the wronged, on the Day of Resurrection both the wrongdoer and the wronged will stand before Allah Who is the Just Judge and the wronged will appeal to Allah to avenge the wrong done to him, Allah will then give this wronged person from the good deeds of the person who wronged him in accordance with his wrong by backbiting his brother on a Day that no father will give his son any of his good deeds nor a friend to his friend. All will be saying, ‘Myself, myself.’

Ibn 'Abbas (May Allah be pleased with him) reported that Prophet Mohammad (PBUH) once passed by two graves and said:

"Verily, they (occupants of graves) are both being tormented and they are not being tormented for something major." In the report from Al-Bukhari:
"Rather, it is indeed something major. As for the first one, he used to go around spreading gossip (nameemah) and as for the other, and then he used not to protect himself from his own urine."
The scholars say the meaning of "and they are not being tormented for something major" is "something major" according to their opinion or "something major" for them to have abandoned doing.

Prophet Mohammad (PBUH) also said:

"Who protects his tongue from unlawful utterances and his private parts from illegal sexual intercourse; I shall guarantee him entrance into Paradise."

Also Abu Mousa Al-Ash’aree narrated that Prophet Mohammad (PBUH) said:

"I asked the Messenger of Allah: Who is the best Muslim? The Messenger of Allah replied, "He is the one from whom Muslims are safe from the evil of his tongue and hands."

And Abu Sa’eed Al-Khudree narrated that Prophet Mohammad (PBUH) said:

"When man wakes up in the morning each day, all parts of the body warn the tongue saying, ‘Fear Allah as regards us for we are at your mercy; if you are upright, we will be upright and if you are crooked, we become crooked."

So, Muslims, you should beware of slipping of your tongues and do not give it free hand to wreak havoc on you. For a too free tongue destroys its owner and causes him calamities and evils.

wasalam

 

[ShaheedU]

Jazakallaah bro for that reminder.

 

[hijabi_sis]

Proud 2 b a Muslim

JazakAllah khair for reminding us....i dont think many of us muslims realise that backbiting is a major sin...
May Allah guide us all

 

[Libinette]

:salam2:

I heard that the one who listens to the one who is backbitting is also sinning, Is this true?

Nice article by the way, thanks

 

[Albint_Almuslima]

:salam2:

Thanx for reminding us!!!

Everyone should know this and always keep it in mind because backbiting is done by everyone and sometimes unintentional.

 

[Happy 2BA Muslim]

:salam2:

Yes, the one who listens to backbiting is also sinning.

Jazak Allahu khayran Brother AbdulRaheem for the important reminder.

One may ask, ''How about backbiting non-Muslims?'' Some people think that just because they aren`t Muslims, we are free to backbite them. That is not true.

Ruling on backbiting about non-Muslims

Question:
Please inform us if the gheebah (backbiting) is the same for non-believers as it is for Muslims.

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly, it is not a Muslim characteristic to speak rudely. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:

“The Muslim does not slander, curse, speak obscenely or speak rudely.” (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, who said, this is a ghareeb hasan hadeeth; it was classed as saheeh by al-Albaani).

Whoever does a thing a lot, it will become his habit, so the Muslim should keep away from all the ways that lead to evil, whether minor or major. Whoever drives his sheep near the enclosure of the king is bound to cross the line.

Secondly, if your question is referring to backbiting about a kaafir by mentioning his physical defects, such as his having a long nose or a big mouth, etc., then do not do this, because this is making fun of the creation of Allaah. If it means talking about his bad characteristics which he flaunts openly, such as zina and immorality, or drinking alcohol, and warning against him, there is nothing wrong with that. There follow some of the comments of the scholars on this topic:

Zakariya al-Ansaari said: “Backbiting about a kaafir is haraam if he is a dhimmi [a non-Muslim living under Islamic rule], because that puts them off from accepting the jizyah and it is going against the treaty of dhimmah (agreement between non-Muslim subjects and the Islamic state) and the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him).

‘Whoever makes a snide comment to a dhimmi has earned Hell.’ (Narrated by Ibn Hibbaan in his Saheeh).

It is permissible (to backbite about a kaafir) if he is a harbi (one who is at war with the Muslims), because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to command Hassaan to lampoon the mushrikeen.”

(Asna al-Mutaalib ma’a Haashiyatihi, vol. 3, p. 116)

Ahmad ibn Hajar al-Haythami said in al-Zawaajir ‘an Iqtiraaf al-Kabaa’ir (vol. 2, p. 27): “Al-Ghazaali was asked about backbiting about a kaafir. He said: with regard to a Muslim, it is forbidden for three reasons: causing offence; criticizing the creation of Allaah, for Allaah is the Creator of the deeds of His slaves; and wasting time in something that is of no benefit. The first is haraam, the second is makrooh, and the third is not the best thing that one can do. With regard to the dhimmi, he is like the Muslim as far as not harming him is concerned, because the Lawgiver protects his honour, blood and property. It was said in al-Khaadim, the first view is correct. Ibn Hibbaan narrated in his Saheeh that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said,

‘Whoever makes a snide comment to a Jew or a Christian deserves Hell.’

The meaning of making a snide comment is to make someone hear something that will cause offence to him. There is no stronger evidence than this, i.e., it is haraam.

Al-Ghazaali said: with regard to the harbi, the former is not haraam, and the second and third are makrooh. With regard to one who commits bid’ah (innovation), if he is becomes a kaafir thereby, then he is like a harbi, otherwise he is like a Muslim, but speaking of him with regard to his bid’ah is not makrooh. Ibn al-Mundhir said, concerning the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him),

“It is your mentioning about your brother that which he dislikes,”

– this indicates that in the case of one who is not your brother, such as a Jew or a Christian or a follower of any other religion, or one whose bid’ah has put him beyond the pale of Islam, there is no backbiting in his case.”

Islam Q&A
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

 

[Bilal Ahmed]

Asalaam Alaykum,

So how does one stop him/her self from backbiting?

May Allah swt forgive me coz i know that i do it, its one of them thing that you dont know that your doing it.

 

[Jihan]

:salam2:

I heard that the one who listens to the one who is backbitting is also sinning, Is this true?

Nice article by the way, thanks

that is true when one listen to another being backbitten, they are both sinning equally. because what if once somebody starting speaking badly about another you turned your face, or told them I do not want to listen to you, or you walk away. then the person who is backbiting has no one to backbite to. it is sin by association.

ps: jazakAllah for the article happy2be muslim and abdul-raheem.

 

[justoneofmillion]

assalamu aleikum,jazakallahu khair backbitting to me is a weakness of iman yes and of personality also it comes i guess from ones own insecurity and lack of confidence a strong personality is someone who can repeat to a crowd of 1000 people what he`de say think between four walls ! no one need to search comfort by slandering others if you speak the truth then Allah swt is enough as witness!

wassalam
sindbad

 

[Happy 2BA Muslim]

A woman who is extremely shy is sitting in a place where people are backbiting – is there any sin on her?​

Question:
I am a girl who hates backbiting and malicious gossip. Sometimes I find myself in the midst of a group of people who are talking about people, and they engage in backbiting and malicious gossip. I myself loathe and detest this, but I am extremely shy and I cannot tell them not to do that, and there is no place where I can keep away from them. Allaah knows that I wish they would talk about something else. Is there any sin on me for sitting with them? What should I do?

Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.

There is sin on you in that case, unless you speak out against the evil action. If they accept that from you, then praise be to Allaah, otherwise you must leave them and not sit with them, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And when you (Muhammad) see those who engage in a false conversation about Our Verses (of the Qur’aan) by mocking at them, stay away from them till they turn to another topic. And if Shaytaan (Satan) causes you to forget, then after the remembrance sit not you in the company of those people who are the Zaalimoon (polytheists and wrongdoers)”

[al-An’aam 6:68]

“And it has already been revealed to you in the Book (this Qur’aan) that when you hear the Verses of Allaah being denied and mocked at, then sit not with them, until they engage in a talk other than that; (but if you stayed with them) certainly in that case you would be like them” [al-Nisa’ 4:140]

And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:

“Whoever among you sees an evil action, then let him change it with his hand (by taking action against it); if he cannot, then with his tongue (by speaking out against it); and if he cannot, then with his heart (by hating it and believing it to be wrong), and that is the weakest of faith.” (Narrated by Imam Muslim in his Saheeh). And there are many similar aayahs and ahaadeeth.


Fataawa al-Shaykh ibn Baaz in al-Fataawa al-Jaami’ah li’l-Mar’ah al-Muslimah, p. 1012

 

[JABRAN]

In the light of quran

:salam2:
importance of surah asar :
In this case it will be best to interpret chapter 103 of quran.this chapter/surah is at so high level that when 2 companions/sahabas used to meet each other , they used to recite this surah to each other before leaving.
the companions even said that if the quran had not been revealed ,only this surah was enough for us.

surah asar, translation :
1. By the time of the beloved (Prophet).

2. Undoubtedly, man is necessarily in loss.

3. But those who believed and did good deeds and stressed one another to accept truth and counseled one another to be steadfast

Conclusions :
We can see here Allah has told four things ,which are necessary for a person who doesnot want to be in 'loss'. note the stress 'necessarily'.
these four things are
1. to believe in Allah ,his messenger,angels........
2. do good deeds (all those decribed by our prophet ,here not to back bite)
3. say others to do good deeds ,
4. as we know 'truth is bitter' ,so people may get angry from you ,they can become your enemy as in case of Holy prophet, but the 4th point is that u have to be steadfast with the truth and should not retreat.
and this said to be necessary if u doesnt want to be in loss.

 

[zarah]

:salam2:

Jazzak-Allah Khair for sharing!

 

[alkathiri]

Some cases where backbiting is allowed

From Riyadhus salihin by Imam Nawawi RA

[Backbiting is permissible only for valid reasons approved by Shari`ah. These reasons are as follows:]

1. It is permissible for an oppressed person to speak before the judge or someone in a similar position of authority to help him or her establish his or her rights by telling him `so-and-so wronged me and has done such and such to me' etc.

2. It is permissible to seek somebody's assistance in forbidding evil and helping someone change his or her immoral conduct. One can say to the person who can offer such assistance, `so-and-so does such and such evil deeds. Can you exhort him?' etc. This is permissible as long as one intends to forbid evil. If, however, one intends something else apart from this, then this act becomes unlawful.

3. One who seeks legal verdict on a certain matter may point out the defaults of another person or relate something else. One in this case can say to the Mufti (religious scholar who issues verdicts): "My father or brother (for example) treated me unjustly. Can I get my right established?'' etc. This is permissible to say only if need be, but it is better to say `What do you think of someone who did such and such?' This does not mean, however, that naming the person in question is not permissible, Hadith No. 1535 makes this point clear.

4. One who criticizes those who openly commit acts of disobedience, such as drinking wine, gambling, engaging in immoral habits, fornication, hypocrisy, and making mischief.

5. It is permissible to call into question the narrators of Hadith, and witnesses in the court when the need arises. It is also permissible to mention the bad qualities of somebody for marriage purposes in case an advice is sought. Also, if one has noticed that a "seeker of knowledge'' frequently goes to the gatherings of an innovator in religion and one fears that this "seeker of knowledge'' may be affected by this so-called scholar, then he must in this case give counsel to the "seeker of knowledge'' by telling him about the "innovator,'' etc.

6. It is permissible to use names such as "Al-a`mash'' which means `the blear-eyed' to talk about people who are known by such names for the sake of identification and not for disparaging people and underestimating them. To identify them without resorting to such names is however better.



1531. `Aishah (May Allah be pleased with her) said: A man sought permission for audience with the Prophet (PBUH). He said, "Give him permission but he is a bad member of his tribe.''
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

Commentary: Imam Al-Bukhari has obviously justified the backbiting of wicked people to save people from being deceived from their appearance. If people are not informed of the real conduct of such persons, their religious as well as worldly life will be exposed to a grave danger. For this reason, the backbiting of wicked persons for the purpose of warning others is permissible.



1532. `Aishah (May Allah be pleased with her) said: The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, "I do not think that so-and-so understands anything of our Faith.''
[Al-Bukhari]

Al-Bukhari said: Al-Laith bin Sa`d, who is one of the narrators of this Hadith, said: The two men mentioned by the Prophet (PBUH) in this Hadith were hypocrites (i.e., they revealed Faith and concealed disbelief).

Commentary: Hypocrites are also people of mischievous and doubtful conduct. It is, therefore, not only permissible but necessary to make people aware of their real position so that people become cautious about them and their religious and worldly life may remain safe from their machinations.



1533. Fatimah bint Qais (May Allah be pleased with her) said: I came to the Prophet (PBUH) and said to him: "Muawiyah and Abul-Jahm sent me a proposal of marriage.'' The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, "Muawiyah is destitute and he has no property, and Abul-Jahm is very hard on women.''
[Bukhari and Muslim].

Commentary: We learn from this Hadith that it is permissible to mention the true facts, virtues and vices without equivocation, about the parties who intend to enter into wedlock provided one does it for their welfare.



1534. Zaid bin Al-Arqam (May Allah be pleased with him) said: We set out on a journey along with the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) and we faced many hardships. `Abdullah bin Ubaiy (the chief of the hypocrites at Al-Madinah) said to his friends: "Do not spend on those who are with the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) until they desert him.'' He also said: "If we return to Al-Madinah, the more honourable (meaning himself, i.e., Abdullah bin Ubaiy) will drive out therefrom the meaner (meaning Messenger of Allah (PBUH)).'' I went to the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) and informed him about that and he sent someone to `Abdullah bin Ubaiy. He asked him whether he had said that or not. Abdullah took an oath that he had not done anything of that sort and said that it was Zaid who carried a false tale to the Messenger of Allah (PBUH). Zaid said: I was so much perturbed because of this until this Verse was revealed verifying my statement:

"When the hypocrites come to you (O Muhammad (PBUH)), they say: `We bear witness that you are indeed the Messenger of Allah.' Allah knows that you are indeed His Messenger, and Allah bears witness that the hypocrites are liars indeed.'' (63:1) Then the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) called the hypocrites in order to seek forgiveness for them from Allah, but they turned away their heads.
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

Commentary: `Abdullah bin Ubaiy was the chief of the hypocrites at Al-Madinah. In the journey mentioned in this Hadith, which was undertaken in connection with the war with Banu Al-Mustaliq, he had used improper words against the Prophet (PBUH) and Muslims, which were overheard by Zaid bin Al-Arqam (May Allah be pleased with him). The latter informed the Prophet (PBUH) about this occurrence. This incident goes to prove that exposing the designs and conspiracies of hypocrites does not form backbiting. In fact, it is essential to keep people informed about them in the interest of Islam and Muslims.



1535. `Aishah (May Allah be pleased with her) said: Hind, the wife of Abu Sufyan, said to the Prophet (PBUH): Abu Sufyan is a niggardly man and does not give me and my children adequate provisions for maintenance unless I take something from his possession without his knowledge. The Prophet (PBUH) said to her, "Take from his possessions on a reasonable basis that much which may suffice for you and your children.''
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

Commentary: Hind was the mother of Mu`awiyah (May Allah be pleased with him). Along with her husband, Abu Sufyan, she embraced Islam in the year of conquest of Makkah.

We learn from this Hadith that:

1. In order to know religious injunctions, husband and wife can mention each other's shortcomings before a Mufti (a religious scholar who is in a position to issue verdicts on religious matters).

2. If a husband does not give his wife enough money to cover the domestic expenses, then it is permissible for his wife to take some of his money without his permission, provided the amount thus taken is for essential expenses not for superfluous matters.

 

[halah]

jazakallah khair for this reminder,

narrated Aishah may Allah be pleased with her I said to the prophet may the peace and the blessings of Allah be upon him describing Safiah his wife''it's enough she is short'' so he said'' you have uttered a word if it mix with the sea's water it would spoil it''
this hadith mentioned in the book of ''Riaad Al Salheen'':salam2:

`Aishah (May Allah be pleased with her) said: I said to the Prophet (PBUH): "Such and such thing of Safiyyah (May Allah be pleased with her) is sufficient for you.'' (She means to say that she was a woman with a short stature). He said, "You have indeed uttered a word which would pollute the sea if it were mixed in it.'' She further said: I imitated a person before him and he said, "I do not like that I should imitate someone even (if I am paid) in return such and such.''
[Abu Dawud and At-Tirmidhi].

 

[farhopes]

Assalamo alikom

I think that one of the things that help us to avoid backbiting is to train ourselves to keep silent. As the more we speak, the more we make mistake, and the less we speak, the less we make mistakes. Speaking too much is a sign of hardship of heart and if the heart turns to be hard and tough, it'll be easy for the slave tocommit wrongdoings.
thanks, brother i got much benefit from the article.:ma:

 

[Abdul-Raheem]

I think that one of the things that help us to avoid backbiting is to train ourselves to keep silent. As the more we speak, the more we make mistake, and the less we speak, the less we make mistakes. Speaking too much is a sign of hardship of heart and if the heart turns to be hard and tough, it'll be easy for the slave tocommit wrongdoings.
thanks, brother i got much benefit from the article.:ma:

:salam2:

That's why I find it best to shut my mouth when I'm angry or emotional, just in case I say something I might regret later.

wasalam

 

[alkathiri]

:salam2:

A very good book, more explaination on backbiting and when it is allowed

By Imam Nawawi RA, one of the greatest imam:

Riyadhus salihin:
http://www.witness-pioneer.org/vil/h...ad/default.htm