Asalam alaikum
I'd be grateful if any of my Muslim brothers and sisters could help me out a bit. Maybe some of you have been in this position as well, so any sort of help i'd be happy for
I am really, really, really stressed out. To the point where I think i'm going to have a mental breakdown. With school, then with learning more about Islam and learning how to pray and with hiding this from my family it's getting really tough. I knew it would be tough, but I don't think I can handle it. And all the peace I felt when I became a Muslim is gone. In a way even I feel like i'm growing farther away from Allah Certain days I can go and do my prayers, but then today I just felt like I couldn't do it at all. With still learning how to do it on my own, I feel like there's really no point in doing it because I always think i'm doing it wrong or not giving it my all. I know I should take it one step at a time, but even though i'm doing that I still find it impossible for me to ever learn how to do it. Even doing it in my room, I still get inturrupted. Either by my mom or dad yelling at each other and cussing, or by them just knocking on my door. So when I don't do my prayers, I feel so bad and honestly get really sad about it. Then I have thoughts that being a Muslim is stressing me out even more, which I HATE to think. I'm really happy i'm a Muslim, I thank Allah for leading me to the straight path, but then I have thoughts that Islam is just adding more stress to my life. I'm the type of person who gets stressed way too easily and I never know how to handle it, or even to tell myself to calm down. I'd say pray and feel closer to Allah, but how can I when I don't even know how? When i'm doing my prayers too I don't feel close to Allah or that i'm accomplishing anything. Even if I do my 5 daily prayers I don't feel joy that I did them all.
Anyways, what I need is some advice on what I should do. I need to be more stronger when it comes to being a Muslim, but sadly I don't even know how to.
None that involve the masjid though, since i can't goto the masjid and get help from there like i've stated in previous threads.
I'd be grateful if any of my Muslim brothers and sisters could help me out a bit. Maybe some of you have been in this position as well, so any sort of help i'd be happy for
I am really, really, really stressed out. To the point where I think i'm going to have a mental breakdown. With school, then with learning more about Islam and learning how to pray and with hiding this from my family it's getting really tough. I knew it would be tough, but I don't think I can handle it. And all the peace I felt when I became a Muslim is gone. In a way even I feel like i'm growing farther away from Allah Certain days I can go and do my prayers, but then today I just felt like I couldn't do it at all. With still learning how to do it on my own, I feel like there's really no point in doing it because I always think i'm doing it wrong or not giving it my all. I know I should take it one step at a time, but even though i'm doing that I still find it impossible for me to ever learn how to do it. Even doing it in my room, I still get inturrupted. Either by my mom or dad yelling at each other and cussing, or by them just knocking on my door. So when I don't do my prayers, I feel so bad and honestly get really sad about it. Then I have thoughts that being a Muslim is stressing me out even more, which I HATE to think. I'm really happy i'm a Muslim, I thank Allah for leading me to the straight path, but then I have thoughts that Islam is just adding more stress to my life. I'm the type of person who gets stressed way too easily and I never know how to handle it, or even to tell myself to calm down. I'd say pray and feel closer to Allah, but how can I when I don't even know how? When i'm doing my prayers too I don't feel close to Allah or that i'm accomplishing anything. Even if I do my 5 daily prayers I don't feel joy that I did them all.
Anyways, what I need is some advice on what I should do. I need to be more stronger when it comes to being a Muslim, but sadly I don't even know how to.
None that involve the masjid though, since i can't goto the masjid and get help from there like i've stated in previous threads.